# Movie Romances You Found Extremely Disturbing (though they weren't supposed to be) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 27, 2006, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053 "2006-03-27T06:08:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/61 "2006-03-28T04:37:18Z")
> [@Robot Arm](#): > > You’re setting the bar pretty high, aren’t you? The opening of _Dr. Strangelove_ is one of the greatest sex scenes of all time. The unmanned midair refueling from _Stealth_ had more passion, too. (Actually, it was more like some weird rape scene, wasn’t it?) ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/62 "2006-03-28T04:41:47Z")
Hell, I nearly forgot…it’s not a movie, or even a “romance,” but did anyone else catch that last episode of “Ghost in the Shell” on Saturday night? If you did, you know the scene I’m thinking of. :dubious: 😕 :eek: One of those situations where you cast your eyes heavenward and say, “I mean…just…seriously, what the _Hell_, man?” ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/63 "2006-03-28T04:48:09Z")
> [@Cervaise](#): > > No, not the Conrad Birdie subplot. The Albert/Rosie story. That was “creepy” only because Albert’s Jewish mother kept meddling in it. And what’s remarkable about that? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/64 "2006-03-28T04:50:18Z")
> [@Case Sensitive](#): > > I’m not sure it qualifies as a relationship, but the ending of **Revenge Of The Nerds** is pretty queasy: nerd screws jock’s girlfriend by pretending to be jock in costume. When he reveals his true identity, instead of calling the cops she is touched and delighted because the sex was better than with her boyfriend. I’m pretty sure that would qualify as rape, actually. As a nerd, I found that less creepy than inspiring. And somehow, I think most Dopers would agree, for some reason or other. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/65 "2006-03-28T04:57:31Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > The unmanned midair refueling from _Stealth_ had more passion, too. (Actually, it was more like some weird rape scene, wasn’t it?) I haven’t seen it, and the reviews were not kind. I think I will probably watch _Dr. Strangelove_ many more times before ever watching _Stealth_. ---
**Author:** ![JoeSki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b487fb/32.png) [@JoeSki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JoeSki)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/66 "2006-03-28T05:19:49Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > As a nerd, I found that less creepy than inspiring. > > And somehow, I think most Dopers would agree, for some reason or other. I predict this is going to end up as a seperate thread in IMHO sooner or later ---
**Author:** ![Talon\_Karrde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Talon\_Karrde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Talon_Karrde)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/67 "2006-03-28T05:59:18Z")
> [@JoeSki](#): > > I predict this is going to end up as a seperate thread in IMHO sooner or later There was a discussion about it some time ago. IIRC, most of the people didn’t think it was a big deal. ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/68 "2006-03-28T06:08:58Z")
> [@WordMan](#): > > A bit of a hijack, but kinda not: One that kept trying to creep me out but surprisingly did not was **Beautiful Girls** and specifically the relationship between Timothy Hutton’s lost yuppie and Natalie Portman’s old-soul kid. She’s what - maybe 13 in the movie? And yet their dialogue - sorry can’t remember specifics - just works. I completely buy their chemistry - perhaps the fact that they keep a good distance away from each and there is never a sense (that I can recall) that they ever intend to do anything about it beyond talking is what allowed me to buy it… That could have so easily been off-the-chart creepy, but it was played perfectly. You just want to give your heart to Natalie Portman in that movie. > [@Loach](#): > > [Michelle Johnson](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001400/) . Michelle Williams was probably still in diapers. :smack: > [@](#): > > Sometimes Credited As: > Michelle Williams ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 7:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/69 "2006-03-28T07:04:40Z")
**Sixteen Candles**. Michael Anthony Hall sheds his virginity with a girl who’s drunk to the point of unconsciousness, and videotapes it. Am I missing any mitigating circumstances here? Disney’s **Tarzan**. When he replaces his stepfather as king of the apes, Tarzan inherits dad’s harem. The movie glosses over that part, but that’s how an alpha male ape stays in position. ---
**Author:** ![DataZak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ea666f/32.png) [@DataZak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DataZak)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/70 "2006-03-28T08:31:29Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > Pretty much any rom-com movie penned by Nora Ephram (_When Harry Met Sally_, _Sleepless in Seattle_, _You’ve Got Mail_) is full of manipulative, decieving, self-absorbed sociopaths that make the characters in a Neil LaBute play look like exemplars of benevolence \ Ok, could you explain why you think _Harry Met Sally_ qualifies? IIRC, they share a ride to New York after graduating, stay friends for like 10 years or thereabouts, they have sex one night, she thinks it’s serious, he doesn’t, they fight and on New Year’s Eve Billy Crystal realises that Meg Ryan is **the one**. Where’s the disturbing part? Mind you, the last time I watched this was when it first came out on video so I may have forgotten something. Please enlighten me. Thanks. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/71 "2006-03-28T14:38:14Z")
**Sixteen Candles** Michael Anthony Hall sheds his virginity with a girl who’s drunk to the point of unconsciousness, and videotapes it. Am I missing any mitigating circumstances here? Exactly what I wanted to comment on, except I was more grossed out for her waking up in the arms of a wimpy geek. Of course seeing Anthony Michael Hall today, I sure wouldn’t kick him out of bed for wearing his headgear! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/72 "2006-03-28T14:42:43Z")
[QUOTE=WOOKINPANUBOf course seeing Anthony Michael Hall today, I sure wouldn’t kick him out of bed for wearing his headgear! :p[/QUOTE] Where’s EC when you… yada yada yada. ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/73 "2006-03-28T14:57:12Z")
**Eve** , thank you for mentioning _Bringing Up Baby_. I have _never_ enjoyed that movie because I can’t stand to see Katharine Hepburn acting like such an idiot. Actually, there are a lot of screwball comedies I just can’t get my head around. How about Carole Lombard in _My Man Godfrey_, featuring _the_ most dysfunctional family on Park Avenue? It ends with her and William Powell getting married apparently almost against his will. “Hold still, darling, this’ll only take a minute…” ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/74 "2006-03-28T18:12:40Z")
> [@Stranger On A Train](#): > > The whole love triangle (rhombus?) in _Casablanca_ was kind of disturbing; Ingrid Bergman really needs to grow a spine and just stick with someone rather than bouncing back and forth like the neighborhood bicycle. And Captain Renault seems way too interested in Rick. (Renault’s conquests–played for laughs–are also pretty disturbing, but that’s a whole 'nother thread.) I agree with Renault’s conquests being icky. Sex with women who are desperate to get an exit visa is questionable, at best. But I strongly disagree with this characterization of Ilsa. She didn’t “bounce” back and forth. In Paris, she was with Rick. She fell in love with him, believing herself a widow. She left Paris with no chance to tell Rick what had happened or to get any closure at all. In Casablanca, she’s with Victor, but still has feelings for Rick. Her decision in the end (well, really, HIS decision in the end) was more in line with duty than with doing what they wanted. To trivialize Ilsa’s confusion – confusion that arose through no fault of hers – is to miss the whole point of the film. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/75 "2006-03-28T18:50:22Z")
> [@a35362](#): > > How about Carole Lombard in _My Man Godfrey_, featuring _the_ most dysfunctional family on Park Avenue? It ends with her and William Powell getting married apparently almost against his will. “Hold still, darling, this’ll only take a minute…” Plus, Lombard’s character in that film is borderline retarded–how long is William Powell going to find her charming? Then, there are the doormat martyr, passive/aggressive women of [An Affair to Remember](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0050105/) (1957) and [Random Harvest](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0035238/) (1942). Deborah Kerr doesn’t tell love-of-her-life Cary Grant she’s been hit by a car because _it might upset him!_ Greer Garson doesn’t tell her amnesiac husband Ronald Colman that they’re married because _it might upset him!_ Idiots. ---
**Author:** ![Carnac\_the\_Magnificent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Carnac\_the\_Magnificent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carnac_the_Magnificent)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/76 "2006-03-28T19:37:16Z")
The 1994 flick **“The Professional.”** That skeevy interaction between assassin Leon (Jean Reno) and rebelious 12-year-old Mathilda, played by Natalie Portman. Ick raised to the 9th power. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/77 "2006-03-28T20:59:01Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > But I strongly disagree with this characterization of Ilsa. She didn’t “bounce” back and forth. In Paris, she was with Rick. She fell in love with him, believing herself a widow. She left Paris with no chance to tell Rick what had happened or to get any closure at all. In Casablanca, she’s with Victor, but still has feelings for Rick. Her decision in the end (well, really, HIS decision in the end) was more in line with duty than with doing what they wanted. To trivialize Ilsa’s confusion – confusion that arose through no fault of hers – is to miss the whole point of the film. I’m being a little bombastic here. I know that the Rick/Elsa/Victor relationship is supposed to be a metaphor for isolationism versus involvement in the war, and that the resulting decision represents the noble sacrifice ("…the problems of three people don’t amount to a hill of beans…") over detached self-interest (“I stick my neck out for no one,”) but just inside the story, Ilsa strikes me as being…well, not too bright. If I were Bogie I’d give her the heave and not be sorry to have that dead weight hanging around my neck. Give me herones played by Lauren Bacall or Grace Kelly any day over Ilsa Lund. It’s a great movie, by the way, but in spite of it’s manifest problems. The supporting cast (Peter Lorre, Syndey Greenstreet, Conrad Veldt, the staff at Ricks, and of course, Claude Rains) and the great, quoatable dialog (“We musn’t underestimate American blundering. I was with them when they blundered into Berlin in 1918,”) make the film. Being the cynic that I am, though, I prefer the anti-_Casablanca_, _The Third Man_, which has it’s own screwed up love triangle…but it’s one with which I can personally relate. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![saoirse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@saoirse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saoirse)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/78 "2006-03-28T21:16:03Z")
Geex, I can’t believe I forgot this. It was only 11 days ago that it was all over the cable. How about **The Quiet Man** with John Wayne proving his love for Maureen O’Hara by dragging her home from the train station. Just as yucky is the reprise of the sequence in **McClintock** ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/79 "2006-03-28T21:50:49Z")
> [@a35362](#): > > Actually, there are a lot of screwball comedies I just can’t get my head around. How about Carole Lombard in _My Man Godfrey_, featuring _the_ most dysfunctional family on Park Avenue? It ends with her and William Powell getting married apparently almost against his will. “Hold still, darling, this’ll only take a minute…” I can see what you and **Eve** are getting at, but I really enjoy this movie so I’m willing to cut it a lot of slack. I guess I can see past the tantrums and manipulations and still enjoy the open-hearted eccentricity. And I still think that’s the funniest closing line in movie history. ---
**Author:** ![well\_he\_s\_back](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3ab097/32.png) [@well\_he\_s\_back](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/well_he_s_back)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053/80 "2006-03-28T21:54:48Z")
oh my gosh - saorise posted the ones I was going to mention. I think “McClintock” is the where John Wayne spanks her in front of the whole town. I saw that as a young girl and it almost made me physically ill. In the movie it’s played “cute.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-romances-you-found-extremely-disturbing-though-they-werent-supposed-to-be/350053.md?page=5)