# Movies and TV shows that need Remakes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 22, 2002, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393 "2002-10-22T16:15:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ccd318/32.png) [@Paul\_in\_Qatar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_in_Qatar)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/1 "2002-10-22T16:15:13Z")
Fantastic Voyage (with new special effects) Miracle on 34th Street The Three Stooges (HBO did a movieo n the "real behind the camera Stooges. The actors were great and should reinvent the Stooges in the modern era.) any others? ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/2 "2002-10-22T16:22:49Z")
_Miracle on 34th Street_ was remade a few years back with the old dude from _Jurassic Park_ as Santa. ---
**Author:** ![brianjedi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@brianjedi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brianjedi)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/3 "2002-10-22T19:24:14Z")
“Why don’t they ever bring back or remake good shows, like ‘BJ and the Bear.’ Now there’s a concept I can’t get enough of, a man and his monkey.” -Brodie, Mallrats I want the Batman animated series back. That show kicked ass. -brianjedi ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/4 "2002-10-22T20:46:38Z")
“Memoirs of an Invisible Man.” Maybe this time, they could actually shoot the book that H.F. Saint wrote. ---
**Author:** ![Hodge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Hodge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hodge)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2002, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/5 "2002-10-22T23:59:36Z")
I wish that Hollywood wouldn’t waste so much time re-making good and/or successful properties. The results almost always suffer in comparison to the original. Of course, there are exceptions such as **The Fugitive** , that benefitted from a greatly expanded production and a knock-out performance by Tommy Lee Jones, or **The Brady Bunch Movie** which had a new spin on the material but I still think those are rarities. More often we see creatively bankrupt efforts like Gus Van Sant’s superfluous shot-by-shot remake of **Psycho** or the utterly banal remake of the utterly enchanting original **Miracle on 34th Street**. Instead, it would be much more interesting if the studios would re-visit more interesting but flawed movies. This would give them room to correct old mistakes and they would catch far less flack for taking liberties with the original. **Fantastic Voyage** is a perfect example of just such a movie. **Memoirs of an Invisible Man** is also a good choice. For years I wondered why people always dissed this movie. I’d always thought it was a good, not great, John Carpenter flick esp. in comparison with most of his recent output. Then, 2 years ago, I came across the novel at a used book sale and picked it up on a whim. Wow! The book was exciting, tension-filled, loaded with dark humour and far, far better than the movie. I’d _love_ to see a faithful adaptation of this up on the screen but I don’t know whether the story is well-suited for the medium. My own nomination would be **Omega Man**. The Chuck Heston movie had its own schlocky charm but it steadily grew worse as the film went on and the tension entirely dissipated with the ill-advised introduction of new characters. A faithful adaptation of the original Richard Matheson novel **I Am Legend** would make a bleak, taut thriller ecompassing deeper themes about the nature of society and what it means to be human. There are plenty of others I can think of, but this post is long enough as it is. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/6 "2002-10-23T00:00:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Annie-Xmas \* > \*\*“Memoirs of an Invisible Man.” Maybe this time, they could actually shoot the book that H.F. Saint wrote. \*\* You ain’t just whistlin’ Dixie. ---
**Author:** ![Roadwalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19b73/32.png) [@Roadwalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roadwalker)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/7 "2002-10-23T00:51:42Z")
Hawaii five-O as a feature film. Have it set in modern times with Tom Selleck playing Magnum. There could be a new thread to cast the rest. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/8 "2002-10-23T01:40:26Z")
How about a remake of **Theatre of Blood** with Kenneth Branagh as the murderous, over-the-top Shakespearean actor (and Kate Winslet or Helena Bonham-Carter as his daughter/accomplice)? ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/9 "2002-10-23T02:48:39Z")
> [@](#): > > How about a remake of Theatre of Blood with Kenneth Branagh as the murderous, over-the-top Shakespearean actor (and Kate Winslet or Helena Bonham-Carter as his daughter/accomplice)? Was an episode of the original _Star Trek_ based on this? > [@](#): > > My own nomination would be Omega Man. The Chuck Heston movie had its own schlocky charm but it steadily grew worse as the film went on and the tension entirely dissipated with the ill-advised introduction of new characters. A faithful adaptation of the original Richard Matheson novel I Am Legend would make a bleak, taut thriller ecompassing deeper themes about the nature of society and what it means to be human. They did, **before** Omega Man! With Vincent Price, and I think? it was entitled _The Last Man on Earth_. For some bizzare reason, I keep thinking about how one could make a **good** remake of the old Irwin Allen series _Land of the Giants_. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/10 "2002-10-23T02:59:31Z")
_The Swiss Family Robinson_ Only with more cursing. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/11 "2002-10-23T03:01:26Z")
> [@](#): > > ## quote: > > ## How about a remake of Theatre of Blood with Kenneth Branagh as the murderous, over-the-top Shakespearean actor (and Kate Winslet or Helena Bonham-Carter as his daughter/accomplice)? > > Was an episode of the original Star Trek based on this? “The Conscience of the King” ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/12 "2002-10-23T04:09:35Z")
I want to see someone make a true-to-the book version of _Chitty Chitty Bang Bang_. Anyone who has ever acquired an old sporty-luxury car and put love and money and blood into it and found themselves constantly rediscovering the amazing car they’ve got on their hands would be able to relate to Ian Fleming’s _Chitty Chitty Bang Bang_. Commander Caractacus Pott, the inventor, finally has a hit on his hands and is making money hand over fist and by jove he and his family are going to own a motorcar. But they all look rather uninspiring until they see the old wreck. Quite sad. The only one left of its type. An eight litre, twelve cylinder, supercharged _ **Paragon Panther** _. They prod the ancient seats (dust flies out). “We’ll take it.” Into the garage it goes. Equipment arrives in boxes and goes into the garage where the professor tinkers. At the moment of truth, he calls the family together and fires it up for the first time. Actually it misfired the first time, making the funny sound that gave it its name (chittychitty BANGBANG) but the second time around it leveled off into a powerful purr, and they climbed in and he pointed it down the road and easily attained the touring speed of 100 miles per hour. The car was a dark oily green, with mud flaps and running boards and a mixture of elegance and sporty performance (and eccentric aged and obscure features that no one knows about, as you know). The inventor is no Dick Van Dyke. The car is no stupid candstriper model T Ford for people to sing doofy songs on. This car is full of buttons that make things clatter and clank mechanically and its powerful engine is believably up to the job of hoisting it into the air once the cooling fan is extended out the front and undergoes a few little changes. Not little fans perched on the candystripe mud flaps, turning around leisurely while the cast sings some stupid musical number, but a lean mean green oily machine blasting up into the air and over the astonished heads of motorists stuck in traffic below them, cutting the air at several hundred miles per hour. A willfully imperative car that flashes instructions on the dashboard like “PULL”, and if you don’t comply and pull the peculiar knob, it becomes “PULL, IDIOT!” When the movie is over, no one is gonna rush out to buy the sound track, but everyone’s going to wish they could buy their own eight-litre, twelve-cylinder, last-of-its-kind, self-converts-to-air-or-ocean-travel, lightning-fast, supernaturally intelligent _Paragon Panther_. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/13 "2002-10-23T04:30:11Z")
_Metropolis_, the Fritz Lang film, not the anime which apparently only has the name in common. The original is a wonderful piece of work, with effects that are realistic looking even to this day, however, it’s a silent movie, and not too many folks these days will watch a silent film. A remake, done in a _Bladerunner_esque style (or should we say that _Bladerunner_ was done in a _Metropolis_esque style) would stay faithful to the original film’s feel and make it more accessable to audiences. Now if we could just find a way to keep Hollywood from screwing it up. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/14 "2002-10-23T12:58:30Z")
**Fletch** was butchered by Chevy Chase; the book deserves another chance (especially since it’s practically a film script as written). > [@](#): > > “Memoirs of an Invisible Man.” Maybe this time, they could actually shoot the book that H.F. Saint wrote. God, I hope not. The hero of the book was a moron and a half. I didn’t bother with the movie, but the book was so stupid that I don’t blame them for changing it. I see absolutely no need to remake classic films like “Miracle on 34th Street” or “Metropolis.” The original is available, and any remake is bound to be worse. Why bother just because some people are too shallow to want to see color or a silent film? ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/15 "2002-10-23T17:57:05Z")
How about **The Blair Witch Project**? I thought the premise of the movie was brilliant (we found film from three students lost while searching for a witch), but the execution was terrible. Suggested changes for the remake: 1. Hire a less annoying female lead. 2. Give us more background on the witch legend. 3. When some local townsperson starts to say something interesting about the witch, tell the female lead not to cut them off and not to talk over them. Let them finish their own stories, for crying out loud. 4. The characters had a book about the Blair Witch, right? Let them read from it at night in the tent. Use that device to give us more backstory. Helps intensify the fear if we know more about what the witch might be capable of doing. I think just those minor changes would have made this a much better film. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/16 "2002-10-23T18:11:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Roadwalker \* > \*\*Hawaii five-O as a feature film. Have it set in modern times with Tom Selleck playing Magnum. \*\* Actually, I was just thinknig that Selleck is about the right age to do justice to playing Travis McGee… ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/17 "2002-10-23T18:50:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ethilrist \* > \*\* > Actually, I was just thinknig that Selleck is about the right age to do justice to playing Travis McGee… \*\* I agree. It makes so much sense it will not happen. Mine, Star Wars, The Phantom Menace with Joss Weldon at the helm, or any other decent set of writer/director types. The best Star Wars movie, the Empire Strikes Back did not have that self important hack Lucas screwing things up. [http://us.imdb.com/Name?Whedon,+Joss](http://us.imdb.com/Name?Whedon,+Joss) ---
**Author:** ![JohnGalt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johngalt/32/184_2.png) [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/18 "2002-10-23T19:10:40Z")
How about doing Grease right once? Have real singers, and actors who are closer to high-school age, and get rid of the hammy acting and poor editing. Who would you cast in the leads? ---
**Author:** ![Binarydrone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Binarydrone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Binarydrone)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/19 "2002-10-23T19:30:48Z")
I would like to see a movie made of the **Six Million Dollar Man** with suitable modern special effects and the like. Admittedly, the title might need to be adjusted due to rampant inflation and invoice padding government bureaucracies 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Saltire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saltire/32/553_2.png) [@Saltire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saltire)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2002, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393/20 "2002-10-23T19:46:31Z")
**Starship Troopers** with the jumpsuits and sensible military missions this time. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-and-tv-shows-that-need-remakes/133393.md?page=2)