# Movies that insult your intelligence. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 29, 2002, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499 "2002-12-29T13:38:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/41 "2002-12-30T05:51:07Z")
Yeah. He’s pretty crappy, especially compared to his cousin, Spielberg. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/42 "2002-12-30T08:01:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Drastic \* > \*\*I felt something akin to awe during **Armageddon** at several points. The first point was when they nonchalantly decided to start spinning Mir–_Mir_–to get rid of the hassle of weightlessness. By the time one of the shuttles crash-landed on the Armagederoid, and sent the flight crew smashing through the window just like a non-seatbelted car crash, I was giggling madly and waiting for it to end. > \*\* I hated the film until I decided to watch it as a comedy rather then anything remotely serious. Made it much more fun. ---
**Author:** ![Geek\_Mecha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecae2f/32.png) [@Geek\_Mecha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Geek_Mecha)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/43 "2002-12-30T11:56:46Z")
How about science and technology-related errors? I know there have to be some pretty awful distortions of scientific and technological facts in movies. The stuff’s too good for Hollywood to resist. ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/44 "2002-12-30T13:00:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KKBattousai \* > [BWhat the logic is behind this…is beyond me. > > The Core makes Fear-dot-com look like frickin’ Shakespeare. \*\* I won’t argue that it’s not bollocks. But I think the logic goes: 1. The spinning iron-rich core creates the earths magnetic field. 2. This deflects the solar wind of charged particles around us, creating the magnetosphere. 3. If it didn’t the atmosphere would be eroded by reactions with these particles. 4. Some get to earth, bang around being electrically charged and cause the Aura Borealis. 5. Hey, electric charge… lightning’s caused by this too, right. 6. So… no spin = lots of solar wind = lightning storms AFAIK 1-5 are true, but I couldn’t find a good cite. We could ask GQ. I still say 6 is a plausible (if wrong) conclusion from them. ---
**Author:** ![Monkeyman367](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Monkeyman367](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monkeyman367)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/45 "2002-12-30T13:06:55Z")
Ssssssssss! The scientist is actually named Dr. Stoner. Dr. Stoner!!! Oh man, I am still laughing at that! ---
**Author:** ![Spudo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@Spudo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spudo)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/46 "2002-12-30T13:14:16Z")
Reign Of Fire I mean, really now. ---
**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/47 "2002-12-30T13:48:11Z")
Is it just me, or is **Johnny** a tough crowd? Does anyone remember his review of [Magnolia](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2764455#post2764455)? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![asterion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4da419/32.png) [@asterion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/asterion)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/48 "2002-12-30T14:30:12Z")
Of course, when the core of the Earth stops spinning, what happens to all that angular momentum? I shall harass everyone connected with the movie with that question until I get a satisfactory answer. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/49 "2002-12-30T14:44:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Johnny L.A. \* > \*\*But one film that _really_ insulted my intelligence was _Wargames_. At the very end the computer says – over, and over, and over, and over – “The only correct move is not to play the game.” Okay, I’m a reasonably intelligent person. I _was_ able to pick up on the message without _being hit over the head with it_. I hate it when the filmmakers say, “Our audience is stupid. Let’s make The Point so clear that _no one_ will have to do any thinking to figure it out.” \*\* I don’t know what movie you think you saw, but in **Wargames** with Matthew Broderick, the computer only said that one time. > [@](#): > > Ishtar - I know, I know, before most of your times…but in this film the audience is supposed to believe that Dustin Hoffman is the babe magnet and Warren Beatty is the nerdy comic foil. Wrong. Hoffman **claimed** to be a babe magnet, but it was absolutely clear that he was lying (remember when he was on the ledge?) and was a loser with women. And Beatty as the nerd was casting against type – it was a joke, son and was _supposed_ to be unbelieveable. ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/50 "2002-12-30T14:45:23Z")
Transfered to whatever stopped it. The rest of the earth? A magnetic braking effect from somewhere? Hang on a minute, does it stop spinning relative to the earth, or relative to the sun? I’ve got a headache. I should have done a physics degree or not tried to defend really stupid movies for a hobby. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/51 "2002-12-30T14:46:23Z")
Remember _Gremlins_? The cute furries who couldn’t touch water without agonizing pain, but happily romp through the snow with no ill effects? :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Mikahw](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Mikahw](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mikahw)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/52 "2002-12-30T14:56:55Z")
I believe the angular momentum was used by Mr. Burns. See, he used the core’s energy for cheap power. (hey, he tried to block the sun, he’ll do anything.) _sigh_ too bad my computer’s so bad that I can only make out a four or five picture slideshow of The Core trailer. Am I missing anything? Hmm, I’m thinking about **Bruce Almighty**. God must be a sick fucker if he let a person like Jim Carrey have his powers for a minute, let alone a week. What? you mean that movie’s not supposed to be taken seriously? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![sbic56](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@sbic56](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sbic56)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/53 "2002-12-30T15:01:29Z")
Signs Even bigger disappointment cuz I kinda liked Mel in his day. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/54 "2002-12-30T15:10:52Z")
**What Women Want** …such a promising title…such a promising plot… then it becomes again a chick flick and all goes down. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/55 "2002-12-30T15:37:59Z")
Larry Mudd: > [@](#): > > Titanic. > > The Atlantic ocean is nice and warm when it flows into the sinking vessel, and it doesn’t matter how long you’re submerged/wading through it. That whole hypothermia thing only becomes an issue when you’re in the water outside the ship. Of course. Not quite. Hypothermia isn’t a problem unless you’re immersed in freezing water for a while. Running through freezing water isn’t confortable, but it sure won’t cause you to freeze to death. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/56 "2002-12-30T15:44:00Z")
Benny and Joon Only movie I’ve ever walked out of. Absolutely horrible. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/57 "2002-12-30T16:28:46Z")
Guys… looks like The Core may be better than we hoped. Got the science-guy for the movie over here at enworld… [http://enworld.cyberstreet.com/showthread.php?threadid=4912&perpage=40&pagenumber=8](http://enworld.cyberstreet.com/showthread.php?threadid=4912&perpage=40&pagenumber=8) And he says that, pretty much, it’s all possible, except for parts of the ship. ---
**Author:** ![Sofa\_King](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/58956e/32.png) [@Sofa\_King](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sofa_King)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/58 "2002-12-30T16:32:13Z")
I’d like to give the finger to two hopeless turds I had the misfortune of seeing in recent weeks. First off is **K-19: The Widowmaker**. It’s “inspired by actual events,” which is sort of like saying that the wedge of partially digested peanut that I fished out of this morning’s faeces was “inspired by the baked croaker I had last night.” Harrison Ford was obviously sleepwalking through most of the film; you can tell when he’s awake when his shitty accent disappears entirely. Oh yes, and the dog-tired misconception that a nuclear reactor can somehow magically transmute itself into a nuclear bomb is perpetuated. But that film had some charms, even if it was insulting to my intelligence. The _other_ film I had to watch left me a quivering, gelatinous mass of incandescent hatred. Here’s a big “f— you” to Jennifer Lopez and her latest throwaway opus, **Maid in Manhattan**. Oh, but don’t let me spoil the complete lack of fun for you: There isn’t jack shit to spoil in this tired Cinderella rip-off. You know J-Lo is gonna bang Ralph from the moment the damned film actually gets around to a semblence of a plot, which is about a half an hour into the picture. It’s a paint by the numbers picture, done by Jackson Pollock after a drinking a fifth of Senator’s Club. But, as my girlfriend pointed out before I went to the film, “at least you get to see J-Lo’s hooters.” No, you don’t. That was just one of the several deceptions my girl employed to entice me to see the film. You don’t get a blow job after it’s over, either. ---
**Author:** ![Legomancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/779978/32.png) [@Legomancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legomancer)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/59 "2002-12-30T16:37:17Z")
Most of them. My brain doesn’t have an ‘off’ switch, so the phrase, “turn your brain off” doesn’t make any sense to me. I’m also strange in that I don’t consider a movie to be good if I went in expecting it to be twelve miles of dog poop and it turned out to only be eight miles of it. However, I’ll defend ‘Starship Troopers’, or why I don’t mind it. First, i haven’t read the book, so I have no idea how it compares other to how it actually is. Second, I take it as broad satire - I interpet the movie as a propaganda film made during the war with the bugs. Yes, the earth tactics are stupid and the people are idiots, which is why we’re actually getting our asses handed to us, but for jingoistic purposes, the film is trying to convince us otherwise. I think it’s great satire, and I think that’s totally accidental, since I think Verhoeven isn’t nearly clever enough to do it on purpose. I also think it’s great that even if it is on purpose, none of the actors are in on the joke except for Doogie, who knows exactly what’s going on. The other are acting their little hearts out, bless 'em. It’s not a great movie, by any stretch, but I think there’s something more than it gets credit for. I could just be deluding myself. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2002, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499/60 "2002-12-30T16:52:27Z")
Mine would be _Turbulence_. I saw that somebody mentionend the sequel before me. [spoilers] For those who haven’t seen the movie, It’s about a serial killer (Ray Liotta) being escorted from New York state to California by plane and who manages to gain control of the plane by killing his escort and the crew[/spoilers] They wanted us to believe that a flight, on Christmas Eve, from the East coast to LA has only a handful of passengers on board. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-insult-your-intelligence/145499.md?page=4)