# Movies that should never be rebooted **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 8, 2010, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852 "2010-11-08T01:35:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![WarmNPrickly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@WarmNPrickly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WarmNPrickly)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/41 "2010-11-08T19:24:04Z")
> [@Capitaine\_Zombie](#): > > Sasha Baron Cohen. What were they thinking casting an American as Clouseau? Only a Brit can properly mock French pompousness, it’s an earned thing. You nailed it in one. I remembered Martin Short doing some great french impressions, but Sasha Baron Cohen even looks like Peter Sellers. ---
**Author:** ![Scubaqueen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c0e974/32.png) [@Scubaqueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scubaqueen)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/42 "2010-11-08T19:28:58Z")
> [@Fried\_Dough\_Ho](#): > > _Casablanca_ > > /end thread totally. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/43 "2010-11-08T22:25:43Z")
\*True Grit. \* The Coen Brothers can suck it. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/44 "2010-11-08T22:35:09Z")
> [@digs](#): > > How about as a RomCom? > > _ **“When Brad met Janet”** _! what, a prequel? zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz The thirteenth and final episode: They get into the car and set off for a trip…“Brad, it looks like it’s going to rain really hard!” ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/45 "2010-11-08T22:39:15Z")
> [@Alessan](#): > > _Star Wars._ > > By which I mean refilming the the original trilogy with a new cast or, preferably, no cast at all. > > And don’t tell me Lucas hasn’t thought of it. He’s always said- I don’t know how tongue-in-cheek- that his goal is to ultimately shoot movies without actors, just synthetic images and synthetic voices. He also said that STAR WARS was only a percent of what he wanted it to be. If technology ever progresses to where he can accomplish the 100% digital movie that’s at all watchable then I’m sure he will. [QUOTE=BrotherCadfael] Looking at IMDB, they did it again in the eighties, with Harry Anderson as Dowd. I never saw that one. [/QUOTE] Be glad, it was D-R-E-A-D-F-U-L. Anderson substitutes wacky and “getta load of me playing a crazy guy who sees invisible giant rabbits” mugging for Stewart’s innocent charm, plus IIRC they made him far less of a drinker due to changed sensibilities. There were several musicals remade for television that didn’t need to be: _Gypsy_ with Bette Midler was the best of the lot but was basically just a scene for scene remake of the Rosalind Russell- the sets when they were in the desert for example were just as hokey and obviously soundstage as the ones in the original. They remade _Bye Bye Birdie_ into something unwatchable and _Annie_ into a boring version in which Daddy Warbucks comes across as a scary perv- one scene he wants Annie gone and the next he loves her with no explanation other than they sang a showtune togeter and it’s kind of creepy. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/46 "2010-11-08T23:42:54Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > He’s always said- I don’t know how tongue-in-cheek- that [Lucas’s] goal is to ultimately shoot movies without actors, just synthetic images and synthetic voices. He also said that STAR WARS was only a percent of what he wanted it to be. If technology ever progresses to where he can accomplish the 100% digital movie that’s at all watchable then I’m sure he will… So, given George’s girth, genetics, and lifestyle (lounging in a hot tub all day while he shouts editing instructions to underlings … and plays “Naboo Submarine War” with his over two hundred JarJar action figures)) … … how soon are we safe from him remaking evrything he’s done? Do you think he has heirs who’ll inherit a sealed envelope marked “Mandate to Remake _Eps. I-6_, and _American Graffiti_”? ---
**Author:** ![DWMarch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dwmarch/32/1010_2.png) [@DWMarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DWMarch)\ **Post date:** [November 8, 2010, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/47 "2010-11-08T23:58:34Z")
> [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](#): > > _The Terminator_. It needs Arnold. I respectfully disagree. I think The Sarah Connor Chronicles showed us that many actors can play a decent T-888. Garrett Dillahunt in particular but there were several good Terminators of the week. > [@](#): > > a terminator who relentlessly googles his victims and tracks them via GPS just seems geeky. Obligatory XKCD: > **[More Accurate](https://xkcd.com/652/)** ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/48 "2010-11-09T01:07:02Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > **Planet of the Apes** Marky Mark and the Monkey Bunch ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/49 "2010-11-09T01:14:07Z")
> [@Fried\_Dough\_Ho](#): > > _Casablanca_ > > /end thread “Philistines. I mean how can you re-make _Cassablanca?_ The one starring Myra Dinglebat and Peter Beardsley was definitive.” ``` - Lister ``` ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/50 "2010-11-09T01:17:05Z")
> [@zamboniracer](#): > > Remake it, but come at it from a different point of view, say, Laslo’s or Strasser’s or Renault’s. That might be interesting. Better idea: I saw on PBS or something that they shot _Casablance_ with 3 or 4 different endings before deciding on the one we’re all familiar with. Maybe you could go with one of the others: Ilsa goes with Rick; or, Ilsa goes with Laszlo but it’s **her** decision. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2010, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/51 "2010-11-09T01:19:42Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > Better idea: I saw on PBS or something that they shot _Casablance_ with 3 or 4 different endings before deciding on the one we’re all familiar with. Maybe you could go with one of the others: Ilsa goes with Rick; or, Ilsa goes with Laszlo but it’s **her** decision. Or Doctor Jones shows up, says “Nazis… I hate those guys,” and blows up the gin joint with a supernatural weapon. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2010, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/52 "2010-11-10T23:20:23Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#): > > Or Doctor Jones shows up, says “Nazis… I hate those guys,” and blows up the gin joint with a supernatural weapon. Cut to rubble-strewn ex-gin joint. Ingrid Bergman crying “Reeck, Oh, Reeck…” “Dass okay, Miz Ilsa…” intones Dooley Wilson. But then… Humphrey Bogart steps out of the refrigerator. ! ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2010, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852/53 "2010-11-11T01:08:35Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Because even if you “market the heck out of it,” only so many people are going to pay to leave the house and see a movie they already own on DVD and can watch at home, possibly on a hi-def flatscreen with surround sound. By definition rereleases are a niche thing even if you really enjoy the experience of seeing a movie in the theater. I hate most remakes, but a release is not going to make as much money as a financially successful remake. It would only work for something like 2001 if you could show it in Cinerama again. I saw it several times that way and it is far superior to any other format. Anyhow, 2001 would be an awful reboot, since no one else would have the guts to pace it the way Kubrick did, and to not show the aliens. 2010, on the other hand, could have been done better. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-that-should-never-be-rebooted/559852.md?page=2)