# Movies, theme park rides - come up with your worst ideas **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 16, 2011, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152 "2011-11-16T18:39:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2011, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/21 "2011-11-16T23:00:12Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Book-to-movie: _Flatland_ In 3-D! that is a very intersecting idea. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2011, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/22 "2011-11-16T23:26:39Z")
Much as I love this movie: The 2001: A Space Odyssey Trip to Jupiter ride. Sleep. Eat. Jog around the compartment. Do it some more. An hour and a half later they flash some colored lights in your eyes and kick you out the door (monolith shaped, of course.) ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2011, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/23 "2011-11-16T23:46:31Z")
Saw: The Experience ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2011, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/24 "2011-11-16T23:50:36Z")
Fasten your seat belts, I’m moving this from MPSIMS to Cafe Society. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/25 "2011-11-17T00:08:08Z")
Donnie Darko, the Ride. _Is_ is a ride? Are you really at home, dreaming? Are you slowly regaining consciousness in a hospital burn ward after losing your arms and legs in a car crash? Are you reliving the moment of your birth while experiencing the death of the universe? Are you choking to death on a carnival hot-dog? Is it only a carnival of the mind? Will you ever know for sure as your existence dissolves into the mire of the yellow silhouette of an indifferent razor’s edge on the cusp of awareness? ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/26 "2011-11-17T00:22:26Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Saw: The Experience Hypercube: The Discovery. ---
**Author:** ![Trick\_Rider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Trick\_Rider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trick_Rider)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/27 "2011-11-17T00:40:54Z")
Driving Miss Daisy: The Ride. Now **you** get to see what it’s like to drive Miss Daisy! Merry-Go-Round: The Movie. Epic low-speed horse chases circling a city block until everybody involved decides to stop. **And nobody is brought to justice!** ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/28 "2011-11-17T00:57:00Z")
> [@tdn](#): > > That Lame Little Horse Outside of the Supermarket That You Put a Quarter in and it Vibrates for Three Seconds: The Motion Picture > [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > As the parent of a toddler I regret to inform you that those are a dollar now. As a Michigander, I am happy to inform you that they are still a penny at all Meijer’s supermarkets. [LINK](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-27xkfmvkQ&feature=related) mmm ---
**Author:** ![Anamorphic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/anamorphic/32/3057_2.png) [@Anamorphic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anamorphic)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/29 "2011-11-17T01:00:42Z")
The Battleship Potemkin Bumpy Baby Carriage Down The Steps Ride Actually, that could be kind of fun… ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/30 "2011-11-17T02:18:26Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > Much as I love this movie: > > The 2001: A Space Odyssey Trip to Jupiter ride. > > Sleep. Eat. Jog around the compartment. Do it some more. An hour and a half later they flash some colored lights in your eyes and kick you out the door (monolith shaped, of course.) Is there a separate line for Daves vs Franks? i.e. breathing or nonbreathing 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/31 "2011-11-17T03:12:26Z")
Movie-to-ride: _Joe’s Apartment_. It starts with a ride through a filthy apartment with dirty dishes and clothes all over the place. Then the ride moves on to a giant urinal with a urinal cake manufactured by Phil I. Smith Systems (P.I.S.S.) A jet of yellow water shoots on you from above. At the end of the ride, you slide into a big fat full of live cockroaches. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/32 "2011-11-17T03:38:18Z")
The Big Lebowski Ride: You have to avoid people pissing on your rug, random marmots being dropped on you, having your johnson cut off with a pair of giant scissors, getting KO’d by a bowling ball, having your new car be smashed by a belligerent Viet Nam vet, losing a toe, or just falling victim to a plain old heart attack in a parking lot. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/33 "2011-11-17T03:43:21Z")
Naziworld, where you can ride through ghettoes and gas chambers and the like. ---
**Author:** ![alphaboi867](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alphaboi867/32/3898_2.png) [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/34 "2011-11-17T04:05:29Z")
> [@Sunspace](#): > > I suspect a horrifying experience could be created from the comic linked in [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=631262). From the viewpoint of any of the characters, really. Wow, :eek:. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/35 "2011-11-17T04:34:57Z")
> [@](#): > > Moby Dick: A new log-flume ride, ending in the whale’s stomach. OK, that one might be fun if the entrails aren’t too realistic. No joke – A “Moby Dick” ride already exidsted at the now-defunct **Pleasure Island** in Wakefield, MA, which was open from 1959 19 1969, built by Cornelius Vanderbuilt Wood, who was responsible for the original Disneyland (and had a falling out with Walt) and Freedomland (the short-lived amusement park located _inside_ New York City, and was larger than Disneyland). While it was open, Pleasure Island was the largest amusement park in New England. Here are some pictures from the ride.: > **[Pleasure Island Wakefield Massachusetts 1959-1969](http://friendsofpleasureisland.org/attractions/moby-dick-ride-0.htm)** > > Do you remember Pleasure Island in Wakefield, MA. What a great time. Pleasure Island. Wakefield, MA 01876. Friends of Pleasure Island Organization. > **[What Happened to Moby Dick? | Pleasure Island, Wakefield, Massachusetts,...](http://friendsofpleasureisland.org/attractions/moby-dick/dick.htm)** > > Do you remember Pleasure Island in Wakefield, MA. What a great time. Pleasure Island. Wakefield, MA 01876. Friends of Pleasure Island Organization. https://www.youtube.com/embed/hLnGJro4iz0?feature=oembed&wmode=opaque > **[Ghosts of Pleasure Island](https://marksardella.net/2010/08/31/ghosts-of-pleasure-island/)** > > The dry summer of 2010 lowered the water levels of the ponds at Edgewater Office Park in Wakefield, Massachusetts, revealing 50 year old artifacts from the Pleasure Island amusement park (1959-1969… [http://www.jinglebelle.com/news/102504.html](http://www.jinglebelle.com/news/102504.html) ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/36 "2011-11-17T05:52:47Z")
I actually had a dream last night where Disney had significantly upgraded the railroad ride around a Disney park (it might have been an entirely new park) into a sort of flume ride—the bit where you passed through Splash Mountain was truly impressive, as the ride had been made into a sort of massive, swirling Art Nouveau masterpiece the size of a skyscraper, but the next part wasn’t so fun. You passed through an intricate, anamatronic diorama from Disney’s latest award-winning, animated adaptation… …_Maus_. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Bakhesh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3da27b/32.png) [@Bakhesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bakhesh)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 9:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/37 "2011-11-17T09:48:42Z")
Think I would think twice before getting on a ride called Deliverance, particularly if it had the tag line “You will squeal like a pig” ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/38 "2011-11-17T12:39:06Z")
The Human Centipede Experience might be interesting. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/39 "2011-11-17T12:54:52Z")
Actually, as I think about it, attractions in Cornelius V. Wood’s amusement parks frequently were based on REALLY unpromising premises. **Moby Dick** was downright warm and friendly compared to some of the others. Consider: **The Wreck of the Hesperus** – what could be more fun than a ride based on the Henry Wadsworth Longfellow poem about a tragic shipwreck in which not only is the entire crew killed, but also the captain’s flaxen-haired young daughter, tied to the mast for safety? But that was one of the attractions at New England’s _Pleasure Island_\* > **[The Wreck of the Hesperus](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wreck_of_the_Hesperus)** > > "The Wreck of the Hesperus" is a narrative poem by American poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, first published in Ballads and Other Poems in 1842. It is a story that presents the tragic consequences of a skipper's pride. On an ill-fated voyage in winter, he brings his daughter aboard ship for company. The skipper ignores the advice of one of his experienced men, who fears that a hurricane is approaching. When the storm arrives, the skipper ties his daughter to the mast to prevent her from being Th... > **[WRECK OF THE HESPERUS Pleasure Island Wakefield Massachusetts 1959-1969](http://friendsofpleasureisland.org/attractions/wreck-hesperus.htm)** > > Do you remember Pleasure Island in Wakefield, MA. What a great time. Pleasure Island. Wakefield, MA 01876. Friends of Pleasure Island Organization. **The San Fancisco Earthquake** – at New York’s _Freedomland_ one of the rides in the California section was “The San Fancisco Earthquake” [http://www.dafe.org/articles/parks/freedomland.html](http://www.dafe.org/articles/parks/freedomland.html) st’ve been on this ride. It was so popular that, when Freedomland closed in the early 1960s, this ride ggotr transported to the Lake George NY amusement park, where it continued to run for decades. I think it’s finally closed now. **The Civil War**. According to this site (but not in my recollection), the South in Freedomland featured a Civil War camp, complete with derailed trains and burning houses! What fun! [http://www.junipercivic.com/LatestNewsArticle.asp?nid=346](http://www.junipercivic.com/LatestNewsArticle.asp?nid=346) When you come down to it, an awful lot of attractions feature pretty dismal things that have lost their sting through distance. Viewed objectively, who would’ve thought that _Pirates of the Caribbean_ – a ride depicting naval warfare, imprisonment, marooning, implied rape, torture of the Town Fathers, and rampage and pillaging would make for a proper amusement? \*The titular _Hesperus_ was wrecked on the rock called _Norman’s Woe_ , a reef off Gloucester, MA. I finally got to see it from Hammond Castle in Gloucester several years ago, and was really amazed. Not only is it pretty small, it’s amazing close to shore. It looks as if a ship would be courting disaster to approach it, because it’d risk coming aground as much as striking the reef. Moreover, it seems close enough that, it you struck it, you could just walk to safety. But I’m sure things look a lot different in as storm. have a look: > **[Norman's Woe](http://newenglandtravels.blogspot.com/2007/10/normans-woe.html)** > > Small and uninhabited and unlikely Norman’s Woe unaccountably looms large in New England maritime history, and also in literature. Often l... ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2011, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152/40 "2011-11-17T13:13:33Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Donnie Darko, the Ride. _Is_ is a ride? Are you really at home, dreaming? Are you slowly regaining consciousness in a hospital burn ward after losing your arms and legs in a car crash? Are you reliving the moment of your birth while experiencing the death of the universe? Are you choking to death on a carnival hot-dog? Is it only a carnival of the mind? Will you ever know for sure as your existence dissolves into the mire of the yellow silhouette of an indifferent razor’s edge on the cusp of awareness? At least we know how the ride ends. Why aren’t there any people coming out of the exits? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-theme-park-rides-come-up-with-your-worst-ideas/603152.md?page=3)