# Movies with blatantly stupid premises **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 7, 2006, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823 "2006-09-07T19:51:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/161 "2006-09-11T00:19:55Z")
[QUOTE=Push You Down] Who knows! [/QUOTE] The problem is that the “who knows” response can be used to defend any and all stupid movie premises ever. Try it. ---
**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/162 "2006-09-11T00:51:35Z")
Creature from the black lagoon-scarry when I was a kid. In creature 3 the creature wears a suit. ---
**Author:** ![Push\_You\_Down](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/push_you_down/32/9095_2.png) [@Push\_You\_Down](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Push_You_Down)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/163 "2006-09-11T01:34:03Z")
[QUOTE=Priceguy] The problem is that the “who knows” response can be used to defend any and all stupid movie premises ever. Try it. [/QUOTE] Except it can’t. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/164 "2006-09-11T02:18:58Z")
[QUOTE=Push You Down] Except it can’t. [/QUOTE] Sure it can. How does it work? Who knows? ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/165 "2006-09-11T02:19:44Z")
[QUOTE=Push You Down] Except it can’t. [/QUOTE] Name a premise that can’t be defended by “who knows”. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/166 "2006-09-11T02:26:38Z")
[QUOTE=Push You Down] Except it can’t. [/QUOTE] Sure it can. “Is Verhoeven a hack, or just an idiot?” Who knows? “Is Carrot-Top the anti-Christ?” Who knows? “Are M. Night Shanana movies stupid, or just lazy?” Who knows? ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/167 "2006-09-11T02:30:53Z")
[QUOTE=Priceguy] I think **Push You down** meant to say “Kindly explain how _Last Action Hero_ and _True Lies_ share the same concept, would you?”. It’s certainly what I wanted to ask. [/QUOTE] Oh. Basically both are supposed to be spoofs of the action genre. Last Action Hero spoofing the Schwartzeniger/Lethal Weapon/Die Hard type films and True Lies being a send-up of Bond-style spy films. Basically Harry Tasker lives this normal home life and goes off to work to become this ridiculous characterature of James Bond. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/168 "2006-09-11T02:54:29Z")
Okay, I just had a thought about _Signs_. We hear on the radio that people in a Middle Eastern town had found “a primitive way to fight” the aliens. Then we see that one of them is damaged by water from one of the little girl’s many glasses that she leaves all over the house. Maybe it’s not the water – it’s _little girl spit!_ You get enough little girls to spit on one of those ugly bastards and he’s down for the count! (And believe me, I’ve known some tantrum-throwing little girls that could do the job.) (I can’t help wondering whether something in the nature of a _gun_ might have worked, too.) ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/169 "2006-09-11T15:40:33Z")
A water pistol, surely. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/170 "2006-09-11T16:17:01Z")
> [@](#): > > Okay, I just had a thought about Signs. We hear on the radio that people in a Middle Eastern town had found “a primitive way to fight” the aliens. Then we see that one of them is damaged by water from one of the little girl’s many glasses that she leaves all over the house. > > Maybe it’s not the water – it’s little girl spit! You get enough little girls to spit on one of those ugly bastards and he’s down for the count! (And believe me, I’ve known some tantrum-throwing little girls that could do the job.) > > (I can’t help wondering whether something in the nature of a gun might have worked, too.) You know, the logical extension of this (ways to fight monsters who are vulnerable to water) showed up in one of Jack Chalker’s _Well World_ novels. Basically, people _peed_ at them. I can just see a drunk bunch of guys coming out of a bar and exercising their public duty. Not as efficient as fire hoses, but more _personal_. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/171 "2006-09-11T16:22:18Z")
[QUOTE=Push You Down] If the movie had tried to give explanations tht didn’t make sense THEN people have room to argue but since we are told nothing about them and we see very little of them, poo-pooing that aspect of the movie is just arrogant “I’m so fucking smart I can poke holes in a movie” posturing. Hate the movie because it sucked not because you want to show how smart you are. [/QUOTE] Um, I don’t feel like I had to exercise my intelligence particularly hard to notice the huge, gaping holes in the premise of the movie. I don’t think that noticing how poorly thought out the film was makes me smart. The holes in the movie were obvious. They were gaping. Small children have fallen into them and died. They’re the only man-made structure that can be seen from space! ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/172 "2006-09-11T17:01:44Z")
[QUOTE=msmith537] Con Air - An Airborne Ranger goes to prison for seven(?) years for accidently killing one of a gang of drunken knife wielding rednecks while defending himself and his pregent wife? And then prior to his release he has to be transferred via a plane full of hardened psychopaths? [/QUOTE] Not that it saves the movie, but the prisoner plane was Cage’s only flight home. ---
**Author:** ![Rocketeer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocketeer/32/4437_2.png) [@Rocketeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rocketeer)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/173 "2006-09-11T17:28:29Z")
What I’m thinking is that the two thread topics most likely to result in a flamefest are tipping and **Signs**. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/174 "2006-09-11T17:38:31Z")
[QUOTE=Rocketeer] What I’m thinking is that the two thread topics most likely to result in a flamefest are tipping and **Signs**. 🙂 [/QUOTE] What about indoors versus outdoors cats? > [@msmith537](#): > > The Rock - The only way to resolve a hostage dispute on Alcatraz is to dig up some 70 year old commando who escaped from there? How would you do it? > [@](#): > > Con Air - An Airborne Ranger goes to prison for seven(?) years for accidently killing one of a gang of drunken knife wielding rednecks while defending himself and his pregent wife? And then prior to his release he has to be transferred via a plane full of hardened psychopaths? He pled guilty and was judged harshly due to his military skills. Besides, the long sentence isn’t part of the premise. What’s so strange about him being flown to his original prison on a plane used for transporting prisoners? > [@](#): > > Gone on 60 Seconds - Dude has to steal 50 exotic cars in one night or they kill him and his brother? Unrealistic? Sure. Stupid? How? > [@](#): > > First of all how the hell do five guys steal 50 of ANYTHING in one night? Why wouldn’t one guy be able to steal ten cars in one night? Besides, weren’t there more than five of them? Besides, this isn’t part of the premise either. > [@](#): > > And they have to kick that mobsters ass anyway so they might have saved themselves the trouble. Sure, but not part of the premise either. > [@](#): > > The One - There are multiple dimensions and whenever you kill yourself in one of those other dimensions you get stronger? Except Jet Li is a big pussy in all dimensions except two? Stupid. I don’t remember anything about him being a pussy in the other hundred-odd dimensions. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/175 "2006-09-11T17:55:52Z")
I dont’ think it qualifies as a premise, really, but the movie “THe Green Mile” did not require a suspension of disbelief because of the mystical and magical aspects, it required a suspension of disbelief for this: the fact that a the year is 1933 or something, it’s the Deep South, a posse of locals with guns has found a giant black man holding the dead and bloodied bodies of two tiny white female children and he makes it to prison??? Yeah, right. Sure. Trust me, “Speed” is more believable. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/176 "2006-09-11T18:02:42Z")
[QUOTE=Baldwin] Okay, I just had a thought about _Signs_. We hear on the radio that people in a Middle Eastern town had found “a primitive way to fight” the aliens. Then we see that one of them is damaged by water from one of the little girl’s many glasses that she leaves all over the house. Maybe it’s not the water – it’s _little girl spit!_ You get enough little girls to spit on one of those ugly bastards and he’s down for the count! (And believe me, I’ve known some tantrum-throwing little girls that could do the job.) (I can’t help wondering whether something in the nature of a _gun_ might have worked, too.) [/QUOTE] I’m a fan of Signs, as I’ve stated in other threads, a _big_ fan–yet even I think the movie is an excellent argument for personal gun ownership. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/177 "2006-09-11T18:11:44Z")
[QUOTE=DrDeth] Not only that, but even with every polar cap melted, it doesn’t even close close to submerging all the land except the top of Mt Everest. [/QUOTE] Ah, it’s much worse than that. Remember that the Mariner makes a precarious living by diving to the bottom of the ocean and salvaging crap. He even takes the girl down on a pleasure expedition to see some ruined city. OK, but Mt. Everest, the only remaining dry land, is 29,035 feet high. Denver is famously one mile high. So the Mariner was apparently diving down 4+ miles to do his scavenging. Not hardly. Not even once. For 20 minutes. In 2060. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/178 "2006-09-11T18:29:34Z")
[QUOTE=jsc1953] I like how the plot required a conspiracy involving an air marshall, a flight attendant, and a German mortician.. What, did they just happen to bump into each other in a bar, and hatch a plot? [/QUOTE] Of course, the mortician wasn’t necessary (I’m sure with all the other stuff the Marshal managed he could have stuffed some explosives in the coffin), and if you cut out Mother and Daughter you don’t need the flight attendant either! -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/179 "2006-09-11T18:37:57Z")
[QUOTE=Lok] You would include all kinds of stuff to avoid losing air by accident. [/QUOTE] This reminds me of some shitty Y2K distaster movie. The plot was that the hydroelectric plant would revert to 1900, and would freak out because it would think it hadn’t been filled with water yet. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2006, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823/180 "2006-09-11T19:39:49Z")
[QUOTE=Finagle] OK, but Mt. Everest, the only remaining dry land, is 29,035 feet high. [/QUOTE] Is it ever stated outright that the Dryland they reach is in fact Mount Everest, and that it is in fact the _only_ remaining dry land? I mean, how would they know either for a fact? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movies-with-blatantly-stupid-premises/371823.md?page=10)