# Mr. Happy & The Revenge of the Jilted Valentine Balloon. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 16, 2008, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925 "2008-02-16T22:40:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2008, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/61 "2008-02-18T21:41:26Z")
I think I found her [birthday gift…](http://www.prankplace.com/fun_scarygiftbox.htm) . ---
**Author:** ![hawksgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ed655f/32.png) [@hawksgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hawksgirl)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2008, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/62 "2008-02-18T21:46:48Z")
Do you have a death wish? ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2008, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/63 "2008-02-18T21:47:47Z")
Or you could get her a balloon made up like a [clown](http://www.bomb.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/pennywise.jpg). 😃 Just don’t tell her who suggested it! ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2008, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/64 "2008-02-18T22:01:13Z")
> [@](#): > > Go back to the store and buy two more! 1. She is my kinda gal. Paper shredder disposal. She rocks. 2. I think if you go on vacation, you should have a Mr. Happy greet you at the hotel room and then at some pre-arranged restaurant. 3. Personally, I smell some kind of photoshop competition. 4. For your anniversary I have three words: [scary clown painting.](http://www.bartersauce.com/ViewOffer.aspx?id=326) ---
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2008, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/65 "2008-02-18T22:23:51Z")
[QUOTE=meek] I think I found her [birthday gift…](http://www.prankplace.com/fun_scarygiftbox.htm) . [/QUOTE] Just a side note- I noticed on that site that they have ‘exploding cigarette loads’. No joke… These caused my mom to stop smoking because they burned her face pretty badly. Just a warning for those who consider such things to be ‘fun’. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2008, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/66 "2008-02-18T23:59:35Z")
[QUOTE=ArrMatey!] Just a side note- I noticed on that site that they have ‘exploding cigarette loads’. No joke… These caused my mom to stop smoking because they burned her face pretty badly. Just a warning for those who consider such things to be ‘fun’. [/QUOTE] I always split those loads the long way before inserting them in my husband’s cigs. They were easier to load, AND he never got a burn. Why yes, he HAS stopped smoking. Before he stopped, though, I’d gotten him to the point where he’d take his pack with him wherever he went. Otherwise, he’d find it in a different position, and he never knew whether I’d loaded that pack or not. 😃😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![bbs2k](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e495f1/32.png) [@bbs2k](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbs2k)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/67 "2008-02-19T01:02:49Z")
[QUOTE=meek] She heads to the shower, pulls back the curtain and is - (her words) “TOTALLY FREAKED OUT” by Mr. Happy jumping out at her. She grabs Mr. Happy and stomps him flat. She then heads ten steps to the office room, folds up Mr. Happy and puts him between two sheets of printer paper, and stuffs him down the paper shredder like a scene from the Movie “Fargo.” This paper shredder is sitting right here on the office floor, not 3 feet away from my feet as I type this sentence. [/QUOTE] Umm. Umm. May the good lord protect you. And if this isn’t threadspotting material, then nothing is. ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/68 "2008-02-19T01:15:37Z")
awesome. the paper shredder. there is no coming back from the shredder. ---
**Author:** ![Tenar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/35a633/32.png) [@Tenar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tenar)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/69 "2008-02-19T02:49:10Z")
See, that’s what dangerous about this place. I just spent the last hour and a half googling phrases like “Gacy clown painting,” “Clown parade balloon” and “Harry Potter Prisoner of Azkaban clown jack-in-the-box” looking for something appropriate for **meek** ’s lovely bride. I got nothin’. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/70 "2008-02-19T02:59:46Z")
**Tenar** , would [this](http://www.hauntedmemories.com/ttud.htm) perhaps be a start in the right direction? ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/71 "2008-02-19T03:15:03Z")
**meek** , you must fight back. You can’t let her win. She must get hell for this. She must find another evil balloon, but then she also must face the wrath of a couple of clowns you hired to make breakfast. In the spring, I suggest putting clear, flavorless rock candy in the showerhead. When she showers, she’ll be covered with sugar water. She’ll walk around all day with bees following her and paper and dirt sticking to her. Then she’ll come home and take another shower. **meek** , for mankind, you must win. ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/72 "2008-02-19T03:18:22Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] **meek** , you must fight back. You can’t let her win. She must get hell for this. She must find another evil balloon, but then she also must face the wrath of a couple of clowns you hired to make breakfast.\ [/QUOTE] How about a bouquet of evil balloons delivered by clowns ? ---
**Author:** ![Starving\_Artist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/aeb1de/32.png) [@Starving\_Artist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Starving_Artist)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/73 "2008-02-19T03:18:28Z")
[QUOTE=Starving Artist] Or you could get her a balloon made up like a [clown](http://www.bomb.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/pennywise.jpg). 😃 Just don’t tell her who suggested it! [/QUOTE] Never did understand that hotlinking thingie, but apparently the link above does it. Just Google Pennywise, [thusly](http://images.google.com/images?as_q=&hl=en&output=images&btnG=Google+Search&as_epq=pennywise&as_oq=&as_eq=&imgtype=&imgsz=&as_filetype=&imgc=&as_sitesearch=&safe=off&as_st=y), and you’ll see who I mean. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/74 "2008-02-19T11:47:00Z")
> [@](#): > > How about a bouquet of evil balloons delivered by clowns ? This is GENIUS!!!1111!!! You need to Trademark this idea. The perfect anti-valentine gift for those who are tired of the hallmark holidays ( yeah, I know, it isn’t really a Hallmark holiday, but it’s been totally taken over.) and you get to put some clowns to work. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/75 "2008-02-19T15:36:09Z")
I would suggest that you do what she asks. After all there is another holiday coming up on [March 14th.](http://www.steakandbjday.com/) ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/76 "2008-02-19T16:04:56Z")
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki] **Tenar** , would [this](http://www.hauntedmemories.com/ttud.htm) perhaps be a start in the right direction? [/QUOTE] Jeez. Are you trying to give us ALL nightmares? ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/77 "2008-02-19T16:36:49Z")
[QUOTE=Rick] I would suggest that you do what she asks. After all there is another holiday coming up on [March 14th.](http://www.steakandbjday.com/) [/QUOTE] I dunno **Rick** , I don’t think she has Steak & a BJ Day marked on the calender. And - At the rate I’m going, I’d be lucky to get tofu and a handshake. AGAIN! Dang - you people are vicious! Now **I’m** scared of clowns. **LOUNE** , I can’t Buddy, I made a deal. She didn’t win. It was a tie. We had a lot of laughs talking about it though. And later she kissed me and told me it was her most memorable V-Day in her life. So - I \*think \*I am out of the doghouse for now. . ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/78 "2008-02-19T16:48:29Z")
[QUOTE=meek] Dang - you people are vicious! Now **I’m** scared of clowns. [/QUOTE] You should be grateful for that, having lived your life in dangerous ignorance of the evil that clowns are. (nodnodnodnodnod) ETA: You obviously missed [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=435487) thread, which made it all clear. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/79 "2008-02-19T16:55:09Z")
[QUOTE=OtakuLoki] You should be grateful for that, having lived your life in dangerous ignorance of the evil that clowns are. (nodnodnodnodnod) [/QUOTE] Especially clowns with **cigarette loads!** (nodnodnodnodnod) [sub] (Delivering balloons.)[/sub] . ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2008, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925/80 "2008-02-19T16:56:32Z")
[QUOTE=Rick] I would suggest that you do what she asks. After all there is another holiday coming up on [March 14th.](http://www.steakandbjday.com/) [/QUOTE] Everyone knows that is Pi day… I don’t know where you get your information 🙂 Bring her a floating pie of death! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-happy-the-revenge-of-the-jilted-valentine-balloon/437925.md?page=5)