# Mr Quatro's "Things God Told Me" thread **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 2, 2018, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067 "2018-02-02T21:21:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/21 "2018-02-03T00:52:45Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > They are holes through which the glory of God can shine. You naughty, naughty person. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/22 "2018-02-03T00:53:11Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Everyone knows he looks like [this.](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/southpark/images/3/33/316.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20160413182429) I’m pretty sure [he looks like this](http://thehill.com/sites/default/files/styles/thumb_small_article/public/billboard_020118_twitter.jpg?itok=gVdehuwx). ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/23 "2018-02-03T01:25:39Z")
I have been led to believe that god looks and sounds a lot like [Joe Pesci](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlzbFxYy08c&t=1m55s) ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/24 "2018-02-03T01:42:07Z")
> [@eschereal](#): > > I have been led to believe that god looks and sounds a lot like [Joe Pesci](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlzbFxYy08c&t=1m55s) Well he does have all the answers–that’s why they call him a “whys guy.” ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/25 "2018-02-03T01:56:53Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Holy shit that’s funny. > > Other primates do it for fun, our entire human evolutionary lineage no doubt did it. > > Yes, people have sex just for fun. How horrifying and ungodlike. 😃 _You and me baby ain’t nuthin’ but mammals So let’s do it like they do it on the Discovery Channel_ ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/26 "2018-02-03T02:33:06Z")
**Mr Quatro** ’s appeal to a higher power [has been shut down](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=20764910&postcount=46). I think it’s a good bet that **Bone** is in for some divine retribution: And the Lord God said unto **Bone** , “Art thou the one who turned away from my servant the prophet **Quatro** in his hour of need, and declined to let him speak to the multitudes, that he might once more make many prophecies? Know ye that ye shall feel the wrath of the Lord thy God, for the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.” _– probably somewhere in the Bible. Try to find one without holes in it._ ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/27 "2018-02-03T02:50:12Z")
You better not mock God like this. If you do, he’ll send Satan to the White house disguised as a human, with beady red eyes, flared nostrils, orange hair and little tiny hands. You heathens want that in the White house? ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/28 "2018-02-03T02:51:33Z")
And the minor godling Chimera did retort, “Eh, if Mr Quatro can’t follow simple instructions, then fuck him”. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/29 "2018-02-03T03:16:23Z")
If Quatro \*really \*wants to earn his prophet cred, he needs to lie around in public for a few months cooking his food over burning poop. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/30 "2018-02-03T03:23:31Z")
The Old Testament Prophets, hell, even Jesus and Mohammed stood bravely in front of crowds and preached, even in the midst of opposition. Samuel may have constantly railed at God for giving him a job that he didn’t want to do, but he still did it. Mr Quatro whines that the mods won’t reopen a thread rather than actually making the effort of opening a new one, as several people, myself included, instructed him to do. He can’t be much of a True Prophet of God if he’s too lazy and stupid to do the job. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/31 "2018-02-03T03:24:50Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Wow, reminds me of another long time poster around here. Wish I could remember his name… Starts with a K I think. (Not Kayaker) Kanicbird made my ignore list for a while when s/he was in an excessively preachy period. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/32 "2018-02-03T03:37:56Z")
Speaking of the nutty, I mentioned a while back (I think maybe in OTRU thread?) that I had ran across someone who was banned before my time while browsing the archives who was constantly talking about the paranormal and his NDE, but couldn’t remember the name. I just did some searching and dug him up–it is [lekatt](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=16757148#post16757148), and he made Mr Quatro’s prophesies sound sane by comparison. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/33 "2018-02-03T11:44:50Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Wow, reminds me of another long time poster around here. Wish I could remember his name… Starts with a K I think. (Not Kayaker) > > > [@andros](#): > > > > **kanicbird** Thank you! That was driving me nutty! ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/34 "2018-02-03T14:18:34Z")
_One night in Bangkok and the world’s your oyster The bars are temples but the pearls ain’t free You’ll find a god in every golden cloister And if you’re lucky then the god’s a she I can feel an angel sliding up to me_ God lives in Bangkok. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/35 "2018-02-03T14:28:04Z")
So why is his username **Mr Quatro**? It means “Mister 4.” Wouldn’t he model himself after the Holy Trinity and be **Mr Tres**? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/36 "2018-02-03T14:29:37Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Speaking of the nutty, I mentioned a while back (I think maybe in OTRU thread?) that I had ran across someone who was banned before my time while browsing the archives who was constantly talking about the paranormal and his NDE, but couldn’t remember the name. I just did some searching and dug him up–it is [lekatt](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=16757148#post16757148), and he made Mr Quatro’s prophesies sound sane by comparison. I don’t know about anymore but lekatt used to have a pretty wide ranging internet presence. He always used the same name and he wrote the same type of posts everywhere. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/37 "2018-02-03T14:40:43Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > He can’t be much of a True Prophet of God if he’s too lazy and stupid to do the job. I agree, modern day prophets are just whiny and lazy. Moses spent forty years leading his people through the desert, Quatro finds clicking the ‘New Thread’ button to be too much work for him. I say this because it’s fun to joke about, but it really does weaken his case to be speaking God’s message. If I believed that God was personally handing me prophecies of the future, it would be the most important thing in my life. I’d be posting them everywhere that I could as often as I could get away with (getting banned for spamming would hurt me getting the message out), and telling them in person as much as I can while still keeping a job, unless I was able to get enough donations to spread them full time. From what I see of modern ‘prophets’, though, they don’t seem to have any drive, which makes me question whether they really believe it deep down or if they subconsciously realize that they just have a delusion or attention-seeking idea. ---
**Author:** ![Pantastic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3bc359/32.png) [@Pantastic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pantastic)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/38 "2018-02-03T14:50:37Z")
Also, by following this thread in addition to discovering that this is the guy who thinks that recreational sex is not currently legal, I learned that one Supreme Court justice had no known religious affiliation, which I find utterly fascinating. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/39 "2018-02-03T15:14:30Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > Thank you! That was driving me nutty! I thought you were making a subtle jab and really knew–who you meant was screaming obvious to me with one letter. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 3, 2018, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067/40 "2018-02-03T15:30:30Z")
> [@Walken\_After\_Midnight](#): > > I’d be interested to know what God sounds like. I think you’d find that God usually sounds exactly like the person claiming to speak on God’s behalf. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-quatros-things-god-told-me-thread/808067.md?page=3)