# Mr. Socko, get your stupid ugly ass in here! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 10, 2000, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004 "2000-04-10T15:55:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/1 "2000-04-10T15:55:00Z")
I’m sick and tired of you. You keep bumping all your inane threads to the top (a practise frowned upon around here). Otherwise, you seem to have nothing to add to this board. Just the occasional verbal masturbation about how great a lover you are (I’m sure your chihuahua agrees, however). Who the fuck do you think you are? If you have something to tell us in anyway or another, do it here and do it now. But I hope the mods are able to see you for the fucking troll you are and ban your ass faster than you can say “dud3”. Sockfucker. * * * **Defect borg: _“Refutile is sistance. Your ass will be simulated”._** * * * **WallyM7** on Coldfire: _ **"Yeah, he knows a little about everything because they have a good prison library."** _ ---
**Author:** ![Mullinator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@Mullinator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mullinator)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/2 "2000-04-10T16:16:00Z")
Always a fun spectator sport when Coldfire’s dander gets fluffed up. But, did you think about your target? Do you really think you can take on Socko in the pit and live to tell about it? After all, his demonstrated and proven skills with money and lovin’ are sure to woo all of the women to his side. Plus, his verbal skills rank somewhere in the realm of a poet laureate. This is stiff competition. * * * We went right out there and refused to do accoustical versions of the electrical songs that we had refused to record in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![ultress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/7c8e57/32.png) [@ultress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ultress)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/3 "2000-04-10T16:25:00Z")
Just go back and re-read all the Michael Masterson posts and you should have socko downpat. He can’t even come up with any original posts, he’s using the same topics he used under MM. I mean geesh, if I was gonna troll at least I’d have come up with a different personality and original topics when I changed my name. * * * \*\* _Sigh_. So many men, so few who can afford me \*\* _Original by Wally_ _I’ve learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live so that no one will believe it._ ---
**Author:** ![Squee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@Squee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squee)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/4 "2000-04-10T16:29:00Z")
Mr Socko: Wilt u alstublieft uw penis uit mijn berggeit halen! * * * “Penises don’t belong in the mouth, girls and boys. You’ve got the wrong hole there. Just like you wouldn’t shove pizza up your nose.” -From the **Brother Jed** flyer- ---
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/5 "2000-04-10T16:33:00Z")
**Hey!** Lay off. Mr Sock is our new sig master. He’s doing a fine job with the custom original sigs. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/6 "2000-04-10T16:55:00Z")
(hijack) Hey, **Squee,** I’m totally confused. Brother Jed is an evangelist as well as a band from Carbondale? How does he find the time? And how does God feel about him playing in a rock band? 😕 (/hijack) * * * “Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast!” - the White Queen ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/7 "2000-04-11T05:13:00Z")
Oh I dunno, I find him amusing and a little bit entertaining in the same way we laugh at the sloppy-ass drunk stumbling across the bar with his fly open, toilet paper stuck to his shoe, and trying to pick up women. ## A little pathetic, but still good for a cheap laugh. Pardon me while I burst into flames. ---
**Author:** ![Squee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@Squee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squee)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/8 "2000-04-11T05:17:00Z")
**Notthemama** - When I was in college, an evangelist named _Brother Jed_ came to the campus to lecture about “deviant sexual practices” among the student population, including oral sex. He did his preaching in the University Union, so many walking to and from class would stop by an heckle him. I still had a copy of his flyer: retained for it’s comedic value. I doubt very much he is the same man from Carbondale. 🙂 Back to the Mr Socko weenie roast, already in progress… * * * “Penises don’t belong in the mouth, girls and boys. You’ve got the wrong hole there. Just like you wouldn’t shove pizza up your nose.” -From the **Brother Jed** flyer- ---
**Author:** ![SINsApple](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb8c5e/32.png) [@SINsApple](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SINsApple)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/9 "2000-04-11T00:29:00Z")
I don’t find this guy the least bit amusing. And Wally, the guy doesn’t even come close to your sigs. Yours are generally one liners I haven’t heard much or that you seem to have made up on your own. Mr. Sucko’s are the same ones that circulate in every “George :rolleyes: Carlinisms” email I have ever gotten. Yours are funny, his are old! He brags that he is a good lover, eh? I have personally heard him brag that he is rich and bought his own home and car with cash. Yet the guy talks like the least mentally developed guy in this year’s high school freshman. I agree…this guy reeks so bad of Michael Masterson, he musta just had his head pulled out of the guy’s ass. The only thing is, if this is a reincarnation of MM, the new persona is even stupider. But atleast his threads haven’t only been about masturbation and anal sex. * * * Rather, I was in the position of a spore which, having finally accepted its destiny as a fungus, still wonders if it might produce penicillin. –Ayi Kwei Armah ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/10 "2000-04-11T00:36:00Z")
So where is our little sockfucker? I mean, my knowledge on Troll Psychology is limited, but wouldn’t it be normal for a troll to react to provocations? Perhaps he’s scanning the dictionary for new cuss-words such as phlegm and degenerate. ---
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/11 "2000-04-11T00:38:00Z")
Well, you’re right, SINsApple. Our friend is MM in a thinly veiled diguise. He’s about 14 years old and will soon run out of steam. We hope. ---
**Author:** ![Byzantine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@Byzantine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Byzantine)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/12 "2000-04-11T06:29:00Z")
sockfucker? God! Thank you Coldfire for the giggle! I couldn’t help but think of Mark Serlin, fucking all of his sock puppets! ---
**Author:** ![Minxsmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Minxsmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minxsmom)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/13 "2000-04-18T22:55:00Z")
Big haired, perfumed sock puppets? Great image. Thanks, Byz. I don’t think I’ll be sleeping tonight. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2000, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/14 "2000-04-20T05:16:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Coldfire: > \*\*So where is our little sockfucker? I mean, my knowledge on Troll Psychology is limited, but wouldn’t it be normal for a troll to react to provocations? > > Perhaps he’s scanning the dictionary for new cuss-words such as phlegm and degenerate.\*\* Perhaps his posting privileges have been revoked. Lynn ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mr-socko-get-your-stupid-ugly-ass-in-here/6004/15 "2000-04-19T22:13:00Z")
Lynn, I love you. In the appropriate, hateful Pit Way, of course.