# Mrs. L.A. is in the hospital **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 3, 2017, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980 "2017-06-03T05:17:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Evan\_Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b487fb/32.png) [@Evan\_Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evan_Drake)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/41 "2017-06-04T01:39:02Z")
Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/42 "2017-06-04T01:41:01Z")
Hang tough !!! ---
**Author:** ![CannyDan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cannydan/32/548_2.png) [@CannyDan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CannyDan)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/43 "2017-06-04T01:51:53Z")
Wishing strength and healing to you both. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/44 "2017-06-04T03:23:46Z")
I called to check on her, and she sounded rather groggy. She said her blood pressure was back up. She has high blood pressure even when she’s not sick. I asked if they gave her medicine for it, and she said they did. She says she’s in good hands. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/45 "2017-06-04T03:31:36Z")
Hoping everything resolves soon. ---
**Author:** ![Gray\_Ghost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c0e974/32.png) [@Gray\_Ghost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gray_Ghost)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/46 "2017-06-04T03:34:40Z")
What Larry Borgia said, upthread. I hope everything turns out for the best, and from what you’re saying, it’s going as well as can be expected so far. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/47 "2017-06-04T03:37:25Z")
Hang in there Johnny. I hope she’s home and healthy soon! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/48 "2017-06-04T03:46:39Z")
> [@Gray\_Ghost](#): > > from what you’re saying, it’s going as well as can be expected so far. > [@TruCelt](#): > > Hang in there Johnny. She has called me a ‘fixer’; if there’s a problem, I try to fix it. I can’t do anything to fix her, and I don’t like this feeling. At all. ---
**Author:** ![stillownedbysetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/49 "2017-06-04T04:24:56Z")
Warmest wishes for a speedy recovery for your wife and a “stay strong” for you and the kitty kids. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/50 "2017-06-04T12:27:47Z")
Sorry to hear of your troubles, **Johnny**. I hope she heals up fast, and please take care of yourself in the meantime. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/51 "2017-06-04T12:47:10Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > She has called me a ‘fixer’; if there’s a problem, I try to fix it. I can’t do anything to fix her, and I don’t like this feeling. At all. Even if you can’t “fix” the specific problem, your very presence is more important and valuable than you will ever know. My late husband had many medical problems (hospitalized 20 times during our 10-year marriage). I stuck by his side, as you’re doing with the Mrs. I went through breast cancer alone after he died. A friend drove me to surgery and picked me up. I drove myself to radiation every day. Don’t for a second underestimate the importance of physically **being there**. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/52 "2017-06-04T13:22:55Z")
In addition to all the moral support \*\*ThelmaLou \*\*mentions, there’s a lot of practical good you can do. Be there when the doc comes through early in the morning. Ask questions. “What’s her status? What has changed? What do you intend to start, stop, or change? What stays the same?” Take notes of all of it. Understand what meds are ordered and why. Ensure he got a clear report from the overnight staff. Ensure the attending nurse(s) during the day are reading the orders right. Talk to your wife to ensure you’re understanding what she’s experiencing and make sure it’s being communicated clearly to the med staff. e.g,. They get used to the usual amount of whining from the generic patient. So they apply the usual discount. If she’s somebody who never whines, her legit complaints will be having a large discount applied. You can correct that. Folks who are ill or on drugs are crappy communicators. Be her envoy. I lived in the hospital for about 4 months with my wife a few years ago. As I said to everybody every day: “I don’t know beans about medicine, but I know a lot about finding and fixing failures to communicate clearly.” Most mistakes of omission and commission in a hospital are simple failures to communicate. Somebody means to write X, actually writes Y, then the next person does Z instead. Somebody sees something, means to write it down, then gets distracted and forgets. Then it’s shift change and the info is lost forever. Watching everything and blowing the whistle when it appears things are starting to veer off course is hugely valuable. That’s the kind of fixing you can do. Also speaking from experience, as somebody who works in a very real-time job the leisurely pace of medicine is very, very hard to take. Doc checks in once every 24 hours and makes a slight tweak to the medication or whatever every 48 hours. Meantime you’re thinking “Hell, this house is on fire and you’re diddling around wasting days between inputs. You oughta be here doing something every _second_!!!” Not really. The body heals slowly. Modern medicine can help greatly. But it can’t work much faster than the body’s natural pace. A lot of what they’re doing is simply keeping the patient alive, fed, and physically safe while waiting for (slightly augmented) nature to fix / repair / heal whatever. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/53 "2017-06-04T13:52:30Z")
Excellent post, **LSLGuy**. Hope all is well in your household these days. ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/54 "2017-06-04T15:24:58Z")
Best wishes, **Johnny**. Hope Mrs LA is out and about soon. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/55 "2017-06-04T17:06:56Z")
I was getting a little concerned this morning when Mrs. L.A. didn’t answer her phone, and the nursing station didn’t answer their phone. I LVM for Mrs. L.A. on her mobile, and she called me back after a while. She said her abdominal pain is getting better, and that her blood pressure is slowly coming down. She’s taken two walks this morning, and I told her we’d go for a walk when I get there. Maybe some light callisthenics. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/56 "2017-06-04T17:17:30Z")
Hoping to hear more good news soon. Best to you both. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/57 "2017-06-04T17:23:25Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > It would feel like a serious violation of ‘marital HIPAA’. First , I am stealing this line. Second, all the best and hope she recovers in good time. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/58 "2017-06-04T17:33:18Z")
Any updates that you can share? Continued best wishes. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/59 "2017-06-04T17:39:08Z")
Only what I posted half an hour ago. Continued thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2017, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980/60 "2017-06-04T17:46:37Z")
Crap - sometimes that “view unread” doesn’t work so well. I see it now and I’m glad she’s improving. I hope the trend continues. :o [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mrs-l-a-is-in-the-hospital/787980.md?page=4)