# Muad'Dib, Question: How thick is your skull?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [November 30, 2001, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048 "2001-11-30T01:23:19Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/61 "2001-12-01T01:04:22Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Oh, please… men have two feelings: Hungry and horny.

Exactly. If there is one main thing I have learn about men in all my 39 years, this is it.

> [@](#):
>
> like action movies, just nothing with Sylvester Stalone, **Antonio Banderas**. . .

:::GASP::: You don’t mean THE Antonio Banderas, do you? :eek: I would watch TV snow on channel 3 if he was the star.

> [@](#):
>
> I thought that liquid honey would be fun. Boy, did that turn out wrong.

Oh hell no!!! No!!! No!!! Honey and body hair DOES NOT MIX!!! Neither does Wesson oil and a bare waterbed matress, or at least when it comes time for clean up. Oh, and cherry pie filling stains your skin so you look like you have a weird rash.

Or so I have been told.

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**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/62 "2001-12-01T01:11:52Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Diane \*  
> \*\*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > Oh, please… men have two feelings: Hungry and horny.
> 
> Exactly. If there is one main thing I have learn about men in all my 39 years, this is it.\*\*

Nope, sorry **Diane** , you’re missing 1/3d the equation:  
Hungry  
Horny  
and one that’s not as easily summed up in one word: the enjoyment of explosions. Men like things that go BANG, like fireworks, dynamite, se…

oh

Carry on

Fenris

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**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/63 "2001-12-01T01:19:52Z")

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God, how could I have forgotten the big BOOM things. Oh, and bodily functions and noises. Can’t forget those.

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**Author:** ![KillerFig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/51bf81/32.png) [@KillerFig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KillerFig)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/64 "2001-12-01T06:50:08Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Xploder \*  
> \*\*Any burrito that contains beans is an abomination to the ghods. \*\*

[nerdyphilosophystudent]You know, you’re not the first to maintain such a position. The Greek mathematician and philosopher Pythagoras was (or was at least believed to be) the founder of a bizarre cult with a number of odd regulations, one of which was a prohibition on eating beans. Just to interject a bit of tangential trivia to the thread.[/nerdyphilosophystudent]

-KillerFig

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**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/65 "2001-12-01T10:55:24Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> and one that’s not as easily summed up in one word: the enjoyment of explosions. Men like things that go BANG, like fireworks, dynamite, se…

But that’s directly attributable to their “Hungry” thing. See, eating food causes gas. Gas causes loud noises. Explosions are just a subset of farts.

Man, I’m really drunk.

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**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/66 "2001-12-01T12:06:35Z")

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Exactly, if i want burritos, i will make my own. I would not eat at Taco Bell ever.

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**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/67 "2001-12-01T16:07:16Z")

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Wanna know something really scary SPOOFE? I understand exactly what you mean. :eek:

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**Author:** ![Verrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/46a35a/32.png) [@Verrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Verrain)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/68 "2001-12-01T17:21:26Z")

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Well with the wrangling over burritos I just wanted to share something we could all agree on.

Mango brie quesadillas are just wrong!

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**Author:** ![Truth\_Seeker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5fc32e/32.png) [@Truth\_Seeker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truth_Seeker)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/69 "2001-12-01T20:56:50Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Verrain \*  
> \*\*Well with the wrangling over burritos I just wanted to share something we could all agree on.
> 
> Mango brie quesadillas are just wrong! \*\*

Hah! That’s what you think! _ **Nothing** _ is beyond debate at the SDMB!

[Champagne Mango Brie Quesadilla](http://www.mangosonline.com/recipes/quesadilla.html)

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**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\
**Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/70 "2001-12-01T21:34:53Z")

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Hey, that sounds pretty good…considering that it came from a West Hollywood chef.  
I strongly disagree with the pico de gallo garnish, however.

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/71 "2001-12-03T03:15:18Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by sturmhauke \*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by some wolf with a big head \*  
> > \*\*Fenris, Arbiter of Food \*\*
> 
> I thought that title belonged to Zenster. Are you an usurper now? \*\*

While I certainly appreciate the laudable concern upon your own part, **sturmhauke** (after all usurping is ever so hideous, no?), evidently I am the [Lord High God of Food](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=1757785#post1757785)™. So let’s all make up and agree that **Fenris** can be the Arbiter of Food.

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**Author:** ![musicguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@musicguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/musicguy)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/72 "2001-12-03T04:17:25Z")

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This talk of what goes in a burrito from people all over the country makes me groan. Cauliflower? Red Rooster Sauce?

Folks, I live a mere 40 miles from the mexican border. When I eat burritos, they come not from an american abomination like taco bell. I go where the mexicans go for mexican food. The **true** burrito that I know and love has meat (your choice), **pinto** beans, cilantro, onion, and salsa. No cotton candy, asparagus, BBQ sauce or whatever other horrendous concotion you can think of. It’s pretty damn simple. Wrap whatever you want in a tortilla and enjoy it to your hearts delight, but please don’t call it a burrito.

Damn, I’m hungry!

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/73 "2001-12-03T05:47:48Z")

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Simmering on my stove is:

[li] Four pounds of cubed pork shoulder[/li]  
[li] Three white onions, diced and sweated[/li]  
[li] _Twelve_ (count them), twelve large cloves of garlic, minced[/li]  
[li] One can of chicken stock[/li]  
[li] The juice from a 28 oz. can of Herdez Salsa Casera[/li]  
[li] Two 6 oz. cans of Ortega fire roasted green chiles, minced[/li]  
[li] Three teaspoons of oil[/li]  
[li] One teaspoon of ground cumin[/li]  
[li] One teaspoon of salt[/li]Waiting for the meat to become tender is:

[li] A pot of freshly cooked cranberry red beans[/li]  
[li] A large bowl of freshly cooked Spanish rice[/li]  
[li] The strained Herdez Salsa Casera[/li]  
[li] A dozen welcome mat sized white flour tortillas (+14" in diameter)[/li]  
[li] A flawless brick of Monterey Jack aged for an extra **five months**![/li]  
This is otherwise known as _Zenster’s Burrito Factory_.™  
The only debate is whether to add the tin of tomatillos. I know they belong in a proper _Chile Verde_, but what I have going tastes so perfect I am really hesitant to add anything else to it.

[sup]BEFORE ANY OF YOU TRY TO RAG ON ME ABOUT USING CANNED INGREDIENTS, MY KITCHEN IS BEING REMODELED SO I AM RUNNING ON A MAKE-DO BASIS.[/sup]

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**Author:** ![Zenster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/cdc98d/32.png) [@Zenster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zenster)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/74 "2001-12-03T07:45:47Z")

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To hell with the tomatillos, this is one of the best green chile stews I have ever made. I can’t wait to see what this tastes like after marrying up overnight. Them’s gonna be some damn fine burritos!

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**Author:** ![Truth\_Seeker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5fc32e/32.png) [@Truth\_Seeker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Truth_Seeker)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/75 "2001-12-03T08:20:06Z")

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GREEN CHILE STEWS?!? Ok, this has gone on long enough. You guys just aren’t getting it.

A proper burrito is a mechanical marvel as well as a culinary masterpiece. A proper burrito must be capable of being eaten with the hands.

Some hold that a burrito should be eaten with both hands. That, however, is a minority position. The better view is that the burrito should be well-filled, but capable of being eaten with one hand, the other being used for your beer.

**Zenster** , no doubt your concoction is tasty, however, things like Chile Verde burritos and Chile Colorado burritos are the creation of fancy-pants restaurants. They are way too wet and you could never pick them up. Why, you’d have to eat them with a knife and fork! They are, therefore, not “true” burritos at all.

This explains why pico de gallo is the salsa of choice and why such extreme care must be taken when applying gaucamole and sour cream. Pushing the envelope risks a “burrito blowout” and that’s something no one wants to see happen.

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**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/76 "2001-12-03T14:20:51Z")

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Taco Bell anywhere in the _world_, **Scylla**? This raises an almost interesting question - **is** there, in fact, any other country in the world crass enough to allow Taco Bells to proliferate? I certainly had never seen one until I ventured to Seattle.

pan

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**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/77 "2001-12-03T14:27:35Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> This talk of what goes in a burrito from people all over the country makes me groan. Cauliflower? Red Rooster Sauce?

You do realize when I mentioned Red Rooster Sauce that I was talking about the way chicken should be eating (with rice, teriyaki sauce, hot pepper sauce, etc.) and NOT burritos, right?

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**Author:** ![heresiarch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/278dde/32.png) [@heresiarch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heresiarch)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/78 "2001-12-03T14:48:54Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by kabbes \*  
> \*\*Taco Bell anywhere in the _world_, **Scylla**? This raises an almost interesting question - **is** there, in fact, any other country in the world crass enough to allow Taco Bells to proliferate? I certainly had never seen one until I ventured to Seattle. \*\*

Almost interesting facts:

Taco Hell is part of Tricon Global (along with KFC and Pizza Hut). Internationally, it’s the least popular of the three, bringing in 2% of the international sales of Tricon. There are 127 Taco Bells in Canada, 6 in Australia, 33 in Puerto Rico, and 83 other (1 of which is on Yongsan Army installation in Seoul, South Korea.)

[link](http://www.triconglobal.com/international/system.htm)

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**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/79 "2001-12-03T14:56:51Z")

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I knew we wouldn’t escape!

_Zenster!!!_ - if it doesn’t have sixty ingredients or take six hours to make, it’s not worth it!

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**Author:** ![grendel72](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/91b2a8/32.png) [@grendel72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grendel72)\
**Post date:** [December 3, 2001, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muaddib-question-how-thick-is-your-skull/96048/80 "2001-12-03T14:59:01Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by LindyHopper \*  
> \*\*
> 
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by k.os \*  
> > \*\*Ahhh! I see! You’re talking about [Sriracha](http://www.huyfong.com/no_frames/sriracha.htm) sauce. The funny thing is that, being a Francophone, I have heard it pronounced _cire a chat_, which in English would mean cat wax! :eek:
> > 
> > Great sauce, though! \*\*
> 
> Oh, _that_ stuff! Never heard it referred to as “hot rooster sauce” before, but I’ve got a bottle in my fridge at home. Yes, it is really good stuff. \*\*

Waitaminute, people. You put red hot cock sauce and pussy wax on burritos?  
That is just sick.

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