# Munchkins v Oompa Loompas:The Sortie of the Shorties **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 7, 2002, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731 "2002-05-07T15:48:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/1 "2002-05-07T15:48:17Z")
In this corner, hailing from parts unknown, living in fear or feral beasts most of their lives, they were rescued by the benevolent and slightly mad Willie Wonka. Now they use their skills to help produce the worlds most delicious candies…often with chilling effects. Flight-inducing sodapop, gum that turns you into a juice- filled orb, a miniturizing/teleportation machine are just some of the weapons at their disposal. Please welcome…THE OOMPA-LOOMPAS!!! And in this corner, from East of the Emerald City in the Land of Oz, living in fear of the Wicked Witch of the East most of their lives, they were rescued from terror when a farm girl dropped a house on their tormentor. A genius, an android, and the king of beasts by their side, they are known for their organizations of the Lullaby League, the Lollipop Guild…and possibly groups more insidious. We wish to welcome you…THE MUNCHKINS!!! Who’d win in a battle royal on neutral ground? Let’s get it on! ---
**Author:** ![Yondan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/278dde/32.png) [@Yondan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yondan)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/2 "2002-05-07T15:57:36Z")
You are sick sick sick. The oompah-loompahs, of course. Those guyz’re _creepy_. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/3 "2002-05-07T21:20:38Z")
I think that’s the highest (if not only) compliment I’ve been paid on these boards. I got the idea when I went to Star Wars Celebration II. One of the autographers had played a Loompah. The picture made me jump when I saw it. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/4 "2002-05-07T22:17:50Z")
Is that the movie Oompah Loompahs or the pre-movie book Oompah Loompahs, with the pictures banned in 50 countries (not really, but i have to put this rider in so i don’t get yelled at) ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/5 "2002-05-07T22:43:23Z")
Well I tried to combine the two. I know the book had them more like pygmies, thus the rescue from the jungle. But you gotta factor in the ultimate creepiness of the orange-skinned Oompahs. I give the Oompah Loompahs an edge what with their abillity to speak in riddles and have words come flying out and possibly smack a few Munchkins around. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/6 "2002-05-07T22:48:28Z")
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was on TV in Ireland yesterday morning. I watched it again while hungover. Sorry, the Oompah Loompahs win, hands-down. They scare the living bejesus out of me. Why would anyone think these tiny orangemen were suitable for kids??? Think of the children, I beseech you. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/7 "2002-05-07T23:06:02Z")
No way. Geeze. Munchkins are immortal. Per Baum (paraphrased quote, but very close to verbatim) “No Ozzite can die. You could chop them up into hamburger and it would still be alive” and get better. On the other hand, you have wussy Oompa-Loompas: the banned black ones, the hippie Californian ones or the orange ‘n’ green movie ones. ANY of them can be killed by “Snozzwangers, hornswogglers or dreadful vermicious Knids.” They were starving to death when Wonka found 'em! Sounds like these guys are such wimps that a strong breeze would knock 'em over. And as a matter of fact, Veruca Salt (an 8 year old girl!) was able to slap a bunch of 'em around without too much trouble. Munchkins would kick Oompa-ass! Fenris ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2002, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/8 "2002-05-07T23:07:45Z")
What about the Jawas? How about the Hobbits? Equal time for all teeny-weenie people! Especially on the battlefield! ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/9 "2002-05-08T01:01:08Z")
Let’s see. The munchkins failed to pile onto the Wicked Witch of the West, even after Glinda mentioned that she had no power in Munchkinland. Victory goes to the Oompahs. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/10 "2002-05-08T01:10:22Z")
No, if you add in all the little people, then Wicket will fight the Lepracauhn will fight Willow will fight Professor Flitwick will fight Warwick Davis, causing the universe to collaspe in on itself! But i wouldn’t mind if any person, big or small, beat the crap out of Twiki! ---
**Author:** ![Yondan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/278dde/32.png) [@Yondan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yondan)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/11 "2002-05-08T02:44:03Z")
You didn’t get any chocolate for the holidays, did you **Fenris**? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/12 "2002-05-08T03:22:38Z")
The Fraggles would kick all their asses. ---
**Author:** ![BalmainBoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6a8cbe/32.png) [@BalmainBoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BalmainBoy)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/13 "2002-05-08T06:31:46Z")
Did you see those Lollypop Kids in the Wizard of Oz? They were cute bovver boys in blundstone booties. At least THEY would kick Oompah butt. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/14 "2002-05-08T07:26:10Z")
Are we ruling out interference from Glinda and Willy Wonka? ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/15 "2002-05-08T11:49:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chronos \* > \*\*Are we ruling out interference from Glinda and Willy Wonka? \*\* Probably. But just in case not, either Willy Wonka (book or movie) could kick Movie-Glinda’s helium-filled butt, but the cool, urbane, uber-powerful Glinda from the books could whip either/both Wonka’s chocolate asses. And let’s not even consider the whole Ozma factor. Fenris ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/16 "2002-05-08T14:46:15Z")
“OOOOO are those the Grunka Lunkas?? Tell them I HATE THEM!” Proffesser Farnsworth ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/17 "2002-05-08T14:58:17Z")
“OOOOO are those the Grunka Lunkas?? Tell them I HATE THEM!” Proffesser Farnsworth ---
**Author:** ![kingpengvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9dc877/32.png) [@kingpengvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kingpengvin)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/18 "2002-05-08T15:16:31Z")
He really must hate them form me to post twice ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/19 "2002-05-08T15:49:30Z")
Must have been asking about the secret ingredient and armed guards. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/20 "2002-05-08T16:26:18Z")
“Unka Grunka dumpity Darmed Guards…” “Shut up!!!” —Bender [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731.md?page=2)