# Munchkins v Oompa Loompas:The Sortie of the Shorties **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 7, 2002, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731 "2002-05-07T15:48:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![crazy4chaucer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b5e925/32.png) [@crazy4chaucer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crazy4chaucer)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/21 "2002-05-08T19:01:21Z")
A battle between the Oompah-Loompahs and the Munchkins? Interesting thought. One might think that it would end in a victory for the Munchkins–if only because they cannot be killed. However, they can be chopped up into teeny tiny little pieces, in which case the Oompah-Loompahs would have effectively won. It would get to a point where even though they were still alive the Munchkins could cause no further harm to the Oompah-Loompahs. So I’m going to side with the Oompah-Loompahs. Besides, I like chocolate! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2002, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/22 "2002-05-08T19:21:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > \*\*No way. > > Geeze. Munchkins are immortal. Per Baum (paraphrased quote, but very close to verbatim) “No Ozzite can die. You could chop them up into hamburger and it would still be alive” and get better. > > Fenris \*\* Then what happened to the Witches of East and West? (Didn’t read any books past the original so if they came back from the ‘dead’ I don’t know it) ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/23 "2002-05-09T07:11:45Z")
Wait a second…If the Munchkins are immortal, why did they have a cornoner? I can think of only two reasons… 1. The coroner was some Munchkin politician’s (The mayor?) no-good half brother, enjoying a cushy job. Or… 2. They needed him to help cover up, and “legitimize” the deaths from the Munchkin’s long-going covert war against the other fantasy-races of fantasyland. It would be the perfect cover, really…The lollipop guild, the lullabye league…all fronts for the Munchkin Intelligence Agency’s brutal military arm. Of course, as Little Nemo said, the presence of Fraggle mercs could swing the tides of war in the oompa-loompa’s favor. I mean, just look at the Fraggle’s almost casual destruction of those little caterpillar guys’ infrastructure. Speaking of Fraggles, did anyone else get the impression that Mokey and Red were…um…you know…oh, Nevermind. Ranchoth ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/24 "2002-05-09T07:23:51Z")
Let’s throw in the little people of the Sid and Marty Kroft universe. Would the [Bugaloos](http://users.myepath.com/morfhis/Bugloony.htm) turn the tide in this battle? How about the Shrinkies from [Dr. Shrinker](http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Hills/6009/drshrink.htm)? ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/25 "2002-05-09T07:25:13Z")
BTW, if the Munchkins were immortal, then how was it possible for one to commit suicide on the set? ---
**Author:** ![BalmainBoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6a8cbe/32.png) [@BalmainBoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BalmainBoy)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/26 "2002-05-09T07:51:41Z")
2nd thoughts, that confirm the first: Oompa-loompas couldn’t even handle a shopping trolley rolled towards them. How could they overwhelm falsetto falstaffian dwarfs? ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/27 "2002-05-09T08:10:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Fenris \* > \*\* ANY of them can be killed by “Snozzwangers, hornswogglers or dreadful vermicious Knids.” They were starving to death when Wonka found 'em! > Fenris \*\* Have you ever battled a vermicious Knid!? They’re a fomidable enemy, let me tell you. And the point is, the Oompa’s had been dealing with them for generations before Wonka found them, and they were still fighting the good fight. Whereas, those Munchkins collapesed like a house of cards the minute one witch showed up, and didn’t do shit for themselves till Dorethy happened to intervene for them. But the deciding factor has to be the Oompa’s insane moral fanatisism, which would certainly drive them to destroy the decadent, lollypop- licking, curly-shoe-wearing Munchkins. No question. ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/28 "2002-05-09T11:39:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by betenoir \* > \*\* > > Have you ever battled a vermicious Knid!? They’re a fomidable enemy, let me tell you. \*\* They’re giant blobs of silly putty that can spell out words. That’s it. In the sequel **Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator** , we see that the only thing that would be scarier than a vermicious Knid would be, say, EVERYTHING! And movie Muchkins may have coroners but book Muchkins don’t. I’ll stand by my assertion that if an 8 year old girl can beat up a platoon of Oompa-Loompas, even obvious sissies like The Lollipop Guild could whip the Oompa’s orange butts. Fenris ---
**Author:** ![Aro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b3f665/32.png) [@Aro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aro)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/29 "2002-05-09T13:55:29Z")
Yoda. When small as him you are, lose at battle you will not. ---
**Author:** ![diku](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4af34b/32.png) [@diku](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/diku)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/30 "2002-05-09T15:51:12Z")
Just remember, the person that started this thread absolutely **hates** the Wizard of Oz. So there’s a built in bias. And I’d take the munchkins, on a numbers basis. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/31 "2002-05-09T16:44:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Max Carnage \* > \*\* > Then what happened to the Witches of East and West? (Didn’t read any books past the original so if they came back from the ‘dead’ I don’t know it) \*\* Well, originally you could die in Oz. then some fairy lady put a spell on the country so no one would age and no one would die. So babies are now babies forever. I don’t know if they ever get potty trained. Also, money was used in the first two books, then after that was phased out. I bet if the Munchkins and Oompah Loompahs got in a fight, the real winners would be the Time Bandits, as they would steal all their stuff while they are fighting. ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/32 "2002-05-09T17:00:48Z")
All creepiness aside, the Oompah Loompahs were too damn passive. Granted, they have deeper voices than the Munchkins, but the Munchkins had the power to organize, where as the Oompah Loompahs allowed themselves to be ripped from their homeland (by _Gene Wilder’s_ freaky ass, no less–would you let him lure _you_ into his van?) and transplanted as slaves/indentured servants in a factory! The Munchkins at least had elected officials, and various advocacy groups going on, and still have the Home Court Advantage. They’re kind to intruders, sure-- but they were the first to tell Dotty and her damn dog where to go, now weren’t they? ---
**Author:** ![shelbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@shelbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shelbo)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2002, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731/33 "2002-05-09T17:27:56Z")
The Oompahs, using their superior organizaion and battlefield communications, honed by years of work in the super-competitive battlefield of capitalism, defeat the Munchikins, who were hampered by persistant internal squabbles between the lolipop guild and the lullaby league over which would assume battlefield command. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/munchkins-v-oompa-loompas-the-sortie-of-the-shorties/107731.md?page=1)