# Muslim Cleric Warns: Cucumbers Too Sexy For Women! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 10, 2011, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757 "2011-12-10T18:31:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/21 "2011-12-12T01:03:18Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > Right, so my basic point stands: you’re not likely to look at the shape of a food item and think “oooh sex!” right? I’m probably not the best person to prove that point, but no. Anytime I hear about food being used for sexual purposes I tend to think of all the things that could go wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/22 "2011-12-12T01:19:07Z")
Maybe someone named **Peanuthead** can help us get a better perspective on the practice of combining sex and food. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/23 "2011-12-12T02:31:03Z")
> [@Silver\_Tyger](#): > > I’m much more likely to call something ‘boobic’ (if there’s a proper word for that, I don’t want to know.) But that’s because it’s funny. Breastial? ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/24 "2011-12-12T03:46:59Z")
> [@Unintentionally\_Blank](#): > > Breastial? [Boobular?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ePusmtf1IQ) ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/25 "2011-12-12T09:46:08Z")
> [@Zebra](#): > > Just what does it take to become a “Muslim Cleric”? > [@UFC\_Is\_Sux](#): > > Quite likely about the same things it takes to become a man of the cloth in The Land of the Free - nice hair, an Armani suit, and gullible parishioners. Eh, the pics that I see of “Muslim Clerics” usually depict a man with bad hair and beard, and traditional Mideastern dress. For this type of “Muslim Cleric/Prophet” I would guess that the requirements are male, bad hair and beard, unshakeable conviction that he knows what Allah wants, and a wide streak of misogyny. Because women are the root of all evil, and all that. Also, complete ignorance of any subject other than selected portions of the Koran. I’m sure that there are reasonable, rational Muslim clerics/holy men. However, they don’t seem to make the news. ---
**Author:** ![BeaMyra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/2bfe46/32.png) [@BeaMyra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BeaMyra)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/26 "2011-12-12T10:10:33Z")
I wonder what they think of the [Washington Monument](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Washington_Monument)? ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/27 "2011-12-12T12:07:16Z")
> [@Silver\_Tyger](#): > > [Boobular?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ePusmtf1IQ) Ahhhh. Chesticles! ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/28 "2011-12-12T12:39:18Z")
Maybe this muslim cleric ought to join the EU Parliament select committee on cucumber classifications? ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/29 "2011-12-12T14:32:39Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > This man clearly has no idea how the average woman thinks. I would do a poll but I won’t… women: if you see something vaguely phallic-shaped, do you immediately respond by getting horny and wanting to have sex? Or do you just shrug and say “huh. Phallic shaped.” and move on? Or more likely, not even notice the shape? Many years ago I bought a video game that was about commanding a submarine. It was a very realistic military game. My then GF commented “You men and your phallic symbols! Why is everything about penises with you? All you can think of is penises!” Um, honey? I’m thinking it’s a submarine. What were you thinking, again? She turned bright red at that. ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/30 "2011-12-12T14:49:30Z")
Aren’t these the same morons that figure that prositution, alcoholism, crime and Allah-knows-what-else will erupt if women are allowed to drive in Saudi Arabia? I love how they feel so threatened by women that they feel the need to suppress them so much. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/31 "2011-12-12T15:49:09Z")
This guy spends entirely too much time thinking about dick. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/32 "2011-12-12T16:00:16Z")
> [@Peanuthead](#): > > So did he warn the male members of his congregation to stay out of donut shops? > [@the article](#): > > Danish/Lebanese journalist Helen Hajjij tweeted on Wednesday: “So if Muslim women should stay away from cucumbers and bananas, should men stay away from melons?” .. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/33 "2011-12-12T17:00:47Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > Right, so my basic point stands: you’re not likely to look at the shape of a food item and think “oooh sex!” right? You obviously haven’t been eating the right foods! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/34 "2011-12-12T17:24:36Z")
That “cleric” is deluding himself if the thinks that any man in that misogynic religion would actually go in the kitchen and prepare food - that’s “women’s work.” :rolleyes: Of course, if the man did handle the cucumber/carrots/zucchini/whatever other phallic produce then he’d be labeled a “homosexual” in this guy’s eyes and ripe for an execution. ---
**Author:** ![Johanna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johanna/32/8318_2.png) [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/35 "2011-12-12T21:34:32Z")
> [@BeaMyra](#): > > I wonder what they think of the [Washington Monument](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Washington_Monument)? The film _Itty Bitty Titty Committee_ had an underground cell of radical feminists who showed the Washington Monument on TV with the upper part replaced by a realistic-looking penis. Then they detonated explosives and the top fell to the ground. Then they overlaid the image with the sentence “This country has too many dicks already!” You just reminded me of that. I much prefer finding yonic imagery in food and nature… for example, in flowers and fruits, especially figs and Georgia O’Keeffe paintings. ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2011, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/36 "2011-12-12T23:22:37Z")
Believe it or not, there’s a traditional Kurdish [religion](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yazdanism) which holds taboo the consumption of lettuce. Salads in some parts of the world must be lacking indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2011, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/37 "2011-12-13T00:17:44Z")
Perhaps they could get a Rabbi to cut it for them. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2011, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/38 "2011-12-13T04:20:15Z")
I guess this explains why I get queasy whenever I see one of those warted cucumbers. ---
**Author:** ![Farmer\_Jane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Farmer\_Jane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Farmer_Jane)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2011, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/39 "2011-12-13T04:30:01Z")
A nameless cleric bans cucumbers? Hmm. > [@](#): > > The unnamed cleric, whose directive was featured in an article in el-Senousa, a religious publication, Sounds like the time when a bet din reportedly ordered a dog stoned to death. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2011, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757/40 "2011-12-13T12:48:03Z")
> [@CitizenPained](#): > > Sounds like the time when a bet din reportedly ordered a dog stoned to death. What, pray tell, is a “bet din”? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/muslim-cleric-warns-cucumbers-too-sexy-for-women/605757.md?page=3)