# My board crushes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 24, 2002, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419 "2002-04-24T19:23:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/1 "2002-04-24T19:23:54Z")
I have two board crushes: **LaurAnge** and **Flamsterette\_X**. What does it take for me to get a **boy** crush going? Hmm? I have pics I can link to… 😉 - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/2 "2002-04-24T19:44:10Z")
Ok… let’s see 'em. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/3 "2002-04-24T19:52:51Z")
What am I? Chopped liver?! ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Carnage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/max_carnage/32/12775_2.png) [@Max\_Carnage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Carnage)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/4 "2002-04-24T19:56:40Z")
Hmm…straight male here and I can’t get any female crushes. Quit being selfish, **Evil**! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/5 "2002-04-24T20:09:58Z")
Awww… now isn’t that sweet… 🙂 **{{{Scott}}}** Just so you know, I love you too! (in a strictly platonic way, of course) **Flamsterette\_X** P.S. **Matt** , I don’t think you’re chopped liver, but I know that’s not what you’re looking for! 😉 But validation is important, so on that note, yes… you’re special too… maybe you just need to make **Scott** see things the same way you do! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![pbrtallboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f475e1/32.png) [@pbrtallboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbrtallboy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/6 "2002-04-24T20:29:03Z")
Chopped liver and canned chicken aside, what are your criteria for board crushes? ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/7 "2002-04-24T21:07:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Flamsterette\_X \* > \*\*P.S. **Matt** , I don’t think you’re chopped liver, but I know that’s not what you’re looking for! 😉 But validation is important, so on that note, yes… you’re special too… maybe you just need to make **Scott** see things the same way you do! 😉 \*\* Umm… **matt\_mcl** and I see things a tad differently… 😉 - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/8 "2002-04-24T21:07:44Z")
**HUMMMMMMMMPHHHHHHHH!** **scott evil** I offered to cook you a nice homemade possum and sweet tater dinner. That **should** be enough to win anyone’s heart, but **nooooooooo** not **you**. Unless you give up them persnickety high falootin standards you got you’ll never have anyone. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Gazelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Gazelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazelle)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/9 "2002-04-24T21:10:06Z")
Still in deep smit with **OncleBiere** , **Petite Guitare avec des Quatre Ficelles d’Hawaii Ike** and **Clog Boy**. ::sigh:: ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/10 "2002-04-24T21:10:43Z")
Hmmm… _LaurAnge looks around for Esprix_ I know there’s at least **one** guy on these boards who has a thing for sexy Montrealers… ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/11 "2002-04-24T21:13:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by matt\_mcl \* > \*\*What am I? Chopped liver?! \*\* You know very well what I think of you. Skanky smeghead trollop. 😉 > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Hastur_ > **Ok… let’s see 'em.** [Here’s one](http://www.planetsucks.com/boardvisualaid/scottevil1.jpg) and [here’s another](http://www.planetsucks.com/boardvisualaid/scottevil2.jpg). > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by pbrtallboy_ > **Chopped liver and canned chicken aside, what are your criteria for board crushes?** What do you have to offer, sweetie? 🙂 - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/12 "2002-04-24T21:19:37Z")
Mmmmmm, that **Miss Creant**. What a hammer! ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/13 "2002-04-24T21:23:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by swampbear \* > \*\*\*\*Unless you give up them persnickety high falootin standards you got you’ll never have anyone. 😃 \*\* My standards? High? I went out with a _certain poster_. My standards are lower than a limbo dancer. 😉 - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![pbrtallboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f475e1/32.png) [@pbrtallboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbrtallboy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/14 "2002-04-24T21:36:35Z")
Hm. I’m over 18 so how about a convenient form of legalized slavery? I can put you to bed, feed you, stub out your joints, clear up the sick, lie for you, disapprove of you, make you coffee, clear your surfaces, open your tins, furnish your prophylactics, write up your shopping lists, turn up at your launches/openings, and buy you every LaCroix bauble your little heart desires, darling. Plus, I have all the AbFab episodes on DVD. ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/15 "2002-04-24T21:39:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pbrtallboy \* > \*\*Plus, I have all the AbFab episodes on DVD. \*\* OK that’s it. Marry me. - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![pbrtallboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f475e1/32.png) [@pbrtallboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbrtallboy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/16 "2002-04-24T21:49:24Z")
so much for high standards. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/17 "2002-04-24T22:15:33Z")
AWWWWWWWWW…we have a proposal. Can I cater the reception? ---
**Author:** ![scott\_evil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@scott\_evil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scott_evil)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/18 "2002-04-24T22:18:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pbrtallboy \* > **Hm. I’m over 18 so how about a convenient form of legalized slavery? I can put you to bed, feed you, stub out your joints, clear up the sick, lie for you, disapprove of you, make you coffee, clear your surfaces, open your tins, furnish your prophylactics, write up your shopping lists, turn up at your launches/openings, and buy you every LaCroix bauble your little heart desires, darling.** Let’s face it: you have everything I’m looking for in a man. Still waiting for you to compliment me on what a hottie I am, based on the pics I posted links to… - s.e. ---
**Author:** ![pbrtallboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f475e1/32.png) [@pbrtallboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbrtallboy)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/19 "2002-04-24T22:25:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by scott evil \* > > Still waiting for you to compliment me on what a hottie I am, based on the pics I posted links to… > > - s.e. Okay, I’ll admit I was pleasantly surprised by the pics. What can I say? I’m a sucker for action shots. Hold on to your possums and gizzards, swampy – I ain’t trying to get hitched. 'Sides, don’t we have to court longer before we can get mary’d? ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2002, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419/20 "2002-04-24T22:41:02Z")
> [@](#): > > **pbrtallboy** > Hold on to your possums and gizzards, swampy – I ain’t trying to get hitched. 'Sides, don’t we have to court longer before we can get mary’d? Nah…remember we’re in the southern good ol USofA. You get him down here and I’ll bring the shotgun. **YEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAA** we’ll have us an old fashioned weddin’! 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-board-crushes/105419.md?page=2)