# My boss announced my pregnancy... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 25, 2013, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341 "2013-01-25T18:10:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WayToGo7600](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@WayToGo7600](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WayToGo7600)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/1 "2013-01-25T18:10:47Z")
I need to know if this is illegal. My boss asked why I’ve needed so many doctors appointments in the past while, and why I am continuing to make new ones. I broke down and told her that I’m 2 months pregnant (even though I didn’t want to tell anyone until at least the 3 month mark, but I felt she was pressuring me). She told me that she couldn’t believe I had been keeping that from her, and that she would have to make some changes with the staff. After our talk I found out she let everyone on staff know about my pregnancy, and everyone is now talking about how careless I am behind my back. Is what my boss did (announcing my pregnancy to all my co-workers) illegal? ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/2 "2013-01-25T18:11:49Z")
Legal questions are best suited to IMHO. Colibri General Questions Moderator ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/3 "2013-01-25T18:15:48Z")
What is your general location? ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/4 "2013-01-25T18:17:14Z")
So, your colleagues found out something you were going to tell them in four weeks anyway. Not seeing the issue. ---
**Author:** ![Martin\_Hyde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/47e85d/32.png) [@Martin\_Hyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martin_Hyde)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/5 "2013-01-25T18:21:09Z")
Not a lawyer, but I’ve had to take HIIPA courses in the past. When it comes to medical records and such, that your employer acquires through various ordinary means, they are supposed to maintain them in a separate file from your employment file and they have a general legal obligation in I believe any of the 50 States to not disclose it. But you personally telling a supervisor something isn’t exactly the same, and adds a layer of wrinkle to the issue and I believe opens it up to a lot more variation State-by-State and maybe even varying based on which U.S. Circuit Court you’re under. ---
**Author:** ![WayToGo7600](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@WayToGo7600](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WayToGo7600)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/6 "2013-01-25T18:22:06Z")
My location is New Jersey ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/7 "2013-01-25T18:33:20Z")
> [@WayToGo7600](#): > > My location is New Jersey Get Vinny to “talk” to your boss. ---
**Author:** ![SmellMyWort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SmellMyWort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmellMyWort)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/8 "2013-01-25T18:38:26Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > So, your colleagues found out something you were going to tell them in four weeks anyway. Not seeing the issue. Three months is considered the safe point to share pregnancy news with less close family and friends because the chance of miscarriage goes way down. No big issue, right. The boss is also adding her personal commentary (that the OP is careless) to the OP’s news. Meh, whatever. The boss also robbed the OP of what might have been a fun/exciting announcement to her colleagues. Suck it up, buttercup. Sorry OP, your boss sounds like a bitch and probably a drama queen. Better scramble everyone because, you know, you’re having a baby in like 8 months. Code RED :rolleyes: Congratulations, by the way. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![thatguyjeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6de8d8/32.png) [@thatguyjeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thatguyjeff)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/9 "2013-01-25T19:03:43Z")
Tactless and inconsiderate maybe, but not illegal. Congrats on the baby! ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/10 "2013-01-25T19:05:12Z")
Double post ---
**Author:** ![you\_with\_the\_face](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/ecccb3/32.png) [@you\_with\_the\_face](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/you_with_the_face)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/11 "2013-01-25T19:07:27Z")
Pregnancy is a medical condition and although it might not be illegal to ask, it’s certainly rude for a boss to pry about what you’re using your sick leave for. For some folks, being pregger isn’t necessarily a happy occasion and announcing it could open them up to judgement (“ooooh, she doesn’t even have a boyfriend and she’s knocked up!”) If she’s an okay boss aside from this breach in decorum, then I’d let it slide. If she’s a bad boss in other respects, this could probably earn her a stern talking to at the minimum. Might not be worth the stress over. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/12 "2013-01-25T19:20:10Z")
> [@WayToGo7600](#): > > …She told me that she couldn’t believe I had been keeping that from her, and that she would have to make some changes with the staff… IANAL, so I’ll leave it to the legal eagles here. But this is the comment that concerned me the most. “keeping that from her”??? She has no legal right to know, or more to the point, to berate you about your body and your life. (unless you’re a model or something, you’re not are you? :)). She’s not your mom or your owner. As to her having to make some changes with the staff, WAAAAH poor thing. I’m in no way a liberal, but sheesh, them’s the breaks of having/running a business. Changes of all sorts have to be made because _GASP_ human beings work for you, they have lives outside of their jobs (usually more important than their jobs), and they sometimes have to leave/change their job, take a leave of absence and so on. You’re well within your rights to take a polite stand against her attitude and let her know that this is your choice and that she has no right to act as if you were embezzling or something. ---
**Author:** ![smaje1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@smaje1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smaje1)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/13 "2013-01-25T19:25:08Z")
I have no idea if what your boss did was illegal, but I’d be livid if it happened to me. If you’ve never been pregnant before, those first three months can be really nerve-wracking – most miscarriages happen within the first 13 weeks of pregnancy ([http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancycomplications/miscarriage.html](http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancycomplications/miscarriage.html)) and it should be the mother’s prerogative when to tell others. I hope your company has an HR department. I’d go to them with this matter – especially the part about your boss asking why about the reason for your doctor’s appointments. That seems…not kosher. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/14 "2013-01-25T19:47:29Z")
> [@OP](#): > > My boss asked why I’ve needed so many doctors appointments in the past while Holy fuck. Next time there’s a blood drive, ask her to donate, and if she says no, ask her why. Is it because she’s taken money or drugs for sex in the past year? Been incarcerated for more than 72 hours? Shared a needle for drugs? Been treated for an STD? ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/15 "2013-01-25T21:46:19Z")
> [@WayToGo7600](#): > > I need to know if this is illegal. > My boss asked why I’ve needed so many doctors appointments in the past while, and why I am continuing to make new ones. I don’t specifically know the legality of it, but I was taught to never ask my direct reports why they needed to be out sick. If it’s more than 2-3 days in a month, I am supposed to let our HR know in case it’s something that the employee may want to use FMLA leave for - but once I let HR know, it’s completely out of my hands and unless there are specific accommodations that need to be made to their work schedule/environment, I never hear about it again - and I don’t hear the reasons why unless that employee chooses to tell me. (and honestly, it’s not my business.) So, I can’t speak to the legality of your boss’ actions, but if you have a company HR person/department, I’d contact them regarding this. ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/16 "2013-01-25T22:03:43Z")
This sounds like it could be one of the “Don’t do this” scenarios from the videos that our HR department makes us watch every year about “Stuff Not to Do If You’re a Boss”. ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/17 "2013-01-25T22:12:36Z")
Now that everyone at work knows you are pregnant, you need to brush up on the [Pregnancy Discrimination Act of 1978](http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/fs-preg.html), because it sounds like your co-workers, even your boss, could get themselves in a work of hurt if they treat you unfairly because of the pregnancy. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2013, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/18 "2013-01-25T23:31:09Z")
If I were you, I’d be really pissed about this. Even if it’s not illegal. You have the right to confide in your boss, with the assumption that she’d keep it private. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2013, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/19 "2013-01-26T00:54:42Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > Get Vinny to “talk” to your boss. Okay if I do it over “email”? ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2013, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341/20 "2013-01-26T01:19:05Z")
I think it was illegal. Your manager should not have a) pressed you for info on why you needed to use sick days, and b) even if you told the manager in confidence that you were pregnant, on your own, the manager making an announcement like that concerning your health or body is not permitted, at least in my state. Then, the manager suggesting changes are needed in staffing because of your preganacy? Over the line - and is suggestive that you will be treated differently because of being pregnant. Not legal. As many of the above posts are suggesting, go to HR and explain. This behavior is not allowed and could open the company up to some serious lawsuit. IMHO. Make sure you are documenting things - if you get laid-off while you are pregnant they are going to be in even more trouble. Also, what **Lsura** and **Duckster** said. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boss-announced-my-pregnancy/648341.md?page=2)