# My boyfriend quit smoking, but I didn't. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 8, 2009, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769 "2009-08-08T20:19:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Kenyth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c68b51/32.png) [@Kenyth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenyth)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2009, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/41 "2009-08-24T16:45:44Z")
I count myself as very fortunate. I quit smoking easily in my 30’s. Over time, I just lost the urge. By my late 20’s I was a light smoker. My consumption kept tapering off until I was only smoking if I was having drinks or with other friends that smoke. My pack of cigarrettes would get stale after sitting around two weeks. My wife got pregnant and quit. After that, the cig habit died a quiet undignified death for both of us. I still puff on an occasional fine cigar, but even that hobby goes for weeks or months in between. I’m losing the desire to do that as well. I haven’t bought any more in over a year, but the humidor still has a few dozen left. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2009, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/42 "2009-08-24T17:43:35Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > Former smoker here. Smoke free for 2 1/2 years. My wife still smokes. > > I hate it. Hate the smell; hate the way she smells. I quite nine years ago and still love the smell. I will hang around folks smoking outside. Sometimes I get a buzz. 🙂 On a more serious note, one of the smokers I used to hang out with on his smoke breaks has died of a heart attack. ---
**Author:** ![Hanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b3f665/32.png) [@Hanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hanna)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2009, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/43 "2009-08-24T17:58:00Z")
I think you may be looking at the situation in the wrong way. > [@](#): > > This all may sound stupid, but I don’t know how to adjust to his quitting. And I don’t want him to start again either. We both used to smoke when we talked, or watched movies. We would smoke after sex and have some really good conversations. Last night, I went out for a cigarette and he fell asleep by the time I came back in. > > For me, smoking has been a long time habit, associated with relaxation and being social, it seems to help me clear my head and focus, all of my co-workers are smokers, most of my friends are smokers. You are looking at quitting as some sort of sacrifice you’ll have to make. Turn it around. Think of how great it is to be a non-smoker and free of that awful addiction. Don’t think of it as missing out on something, or depriving yourself of your right to smoke. Focus on what you’ll gain by being a non-smoker instead! I read Allen Carr and I have been a very happy non-smoker for 4+ years now. Once I changed my thinking, quitting was **easy**. I was a heavy 2 pack a day/25 year habit smoker, too. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2009, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/44 "2009-08-24T17:58:27Z")
> [@cruel\_butterfly](#): > > What really helped me was that my husband and his entire family are non-smokers. Since your boyfriend has quit smoking, this could be your golden opportunity to do the same. Umm, no he hasn’t- he went back. The fact his GF didn’t quit may have been a factor in his inability to stay off the drugs. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2009, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/45 "2009-08-24T18:35:37Z")
^ Turned 27 on Thursday. > [@Hari\_Seldon](#): > > Yes, just quit. I smoked for about a dozen years before I had a heart attack at age 28… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2009, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/46 "2009-08-24T20:27:32Z")
> [@jtgain](#): > > I hate it. Hate the smell; hate the way she smells. I can’t believe that I used to go around other people smelling like that. This is exactly what a good friend of mine said after quitting. That and ‘I feel like I had really bad BO for eight years and no one told me.’ I’ve seen smoker/non-smoker couples work, but the non-smoker will always have the upper hand. If he says your breath stinks, if he says he wants you to go outside in the freezing cold, if her gets mad when you skip out after dinner for a smoke leaving him with dessert and the waiter – it will be very hard for you to argue your case. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2009, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/47 "2009-11-15T09:31:26Z")
> [@legalsnugs](#): > > As his senses of smell and taste improve, and they will, he will notice that you stink of cigarettes. And even brushing your teeth will not help because the cigs have permeated your entire body. And the clothing. And the house. And the car. One of my biggest victories after Dad’s death was getting Mom to change the living room’s curtains, which still stank of his cigs two years after his death (that is, five years after he got diagnosed and quit smoking). He died of pleural cancer, which apparently is so rare there’s no studies which can or can not link it to smoking. ---
**Author:** ![lazurm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7c8e57/32.png) [@lazurm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lazurm)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2017, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/48 "2017-11-22T13:50:24Z")
I know someone who did this which is why I state it. It worked for them but it’s not nearly the best idea. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2017, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/49 "2017-11-22T14:02:17Z")
You realize you posted to an eight year old thread. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2017, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769/50 "2017-11-22T16:00:58Z")
Yeah, this is too old to pursue. Closing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-quit-smoking-but-i-didnt/505769.md?page=2)