# My boyfriend said his little sister's name during sex **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 12, 2001, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827 "2001-11-12T00:11:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ThisYearsGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@ThisYearsGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThisYearsGirl)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/1 "2001-11-12T00:11:48Z")
Not, technically, during sex, but it was close enough. We were doin’ it when it started to hurt me, so I told him to stop. “I’m sorry,” I said. And pulled out and then said, “It’s okay–don’t be sorry, Emily.” And then there was this 20 seconds of silence where were just laying there, both well aware of what he said, but neither of us wanting to comment on it. Should I be creeped out? 'Cause I’m not really, but I feel I should be. Emily’s really little, too; she’s nine or ten. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/2 "2001-11-12T00:15:31Z")
That’s creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/3 "2001-11-12T00:16:03Z")
There is probably no reason at all to be creeped out. People’s brains do weird things. I’d ask him about it, though. ---
**Author:** ![\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/b2d939/32.png) [@\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_Sky)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/4 "2001-11-12T00:17:37Z")
I would be a bit creeped out, especially since you said he had to stop because he was hurting you. It was not in the “Throws of passion”, more of it slowing down. Maybe your names are simular? People do say the wrong names all the time. I would suppose even in that situation. If you had no reason to think anything “odd” then I guess let it go as a slip up. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/5 "2001-11-12T00:19:40Z")
Possibily, it was just because you were sounding vulnerable, and he’s used to comforting his wee sister. I wouldn’t worry about it too much, if everything seems okay otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![epraz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/82dd89/32.png) [@epraz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/epraz)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/6 "2001-11-12T00:28:55Z")
I’m a psychology student…there is no evidence that people who have retrieval failure do it because of other desires or emotions. If he said emily, it could have been because she popped in his head—or it could be habituation-possibly, he’s used to apologizing to Emily for some reason or another. Because he substituted her name for yours does not mean that he views you in the same way or that he’s had similar experiences with her that he has had with you. Don’t worry about it. ---
**Author:** ![Daowajan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3bc359/32.png) [@Daowajan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daowajan)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/7 "2001-11-12T00:45:45Z")
A lot of people are named Emily. How are you so sure it was his sister? ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/8 "2001-11-12T01:07:02Z")
Hey, that’s right. Maybe he was thinking about _my_ sister. Bastard. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/9 "2001-11-12T01:18:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by epraz \* > **I’m a psychology student…** And as such, you of all people should know that you could not _possibly_ gather enough information from the OP to come to any significant conclusions - “Don’t worry about it”. So why bother pointing out your status here? I pray for the future of psychologically unbalanced people if they seek help from… EPRAZ! “Describe your woes in 94 written words, and I’ll solve even your most **complicated** issues!” Or maybe _I’m_ unbalanced, which is a definite possibility. IANAPsychStudent, but I’m going to say that you _should_ discuss this with him. IM(non-expert, unfounded, and possibly incredibly inaccurate, yet ever-so-humble)O, this may indicate a serious problem. It may not. Either way, you should know. Of course, YMMV. Void where prohibited. Size may vary, and blah blah blah. ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/10 "2001-11-12T01:27:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Larry Mudd \* > \*\*Possibily, it was just because you were sounding vulnerable, and he’s used to comforting his wee sister. I wouldn’t worry about it too much, if everything seems okay otherwise. \*\* Good Point. That might make it a _Capture Error_, in which “a frequently done activity suddenly takes charge instead of (captures) the one intended”. [pg 107, The Design of Everyday Things, [Don Norman](http://www.jnd.org/).] On a personal note, as someone who suffers from mild and occasional dysphasia and has been known to call his wife by the cat’s name (albeit not during an intimate moment) I can understand the awkwardness. ---
**Author:** ![tapioca\_tundra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@tapioca\_tundra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tapioca_tundra)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/11 "2001-11-12T01:30:07Z")
~~Maybe he didn’t say Emily at all… Maybe he said a word that only sounded like Emily… “It’s okay–don’t be sorry, reveille…will be at 06:00.” Only he didn’t get to the “…will be at…” part… ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/12 "2001-11-12T01:31:35Z")
This is why words like babe and honey and big bad papaoomawmaw were invented. It would freak me out too if my husband said his sister’s name in that situation. But I have been known to say the wrong person’s name at the wrong time (not during sex though). It has a lot to do with me being a flighty scatterbrain. If it’s bothering you that much, just ask him. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Zagna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@El\_Zagna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Zagna)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/13 "2001-11-12T01:51:15Z")
For us it’s a family tradition to go through two, three or four names before you get to the right one. We refer to it as “calling the roll”. Sometimes even our pets’ names get caught up in the mix. So I wouldn’t worry about it. And Silver, chill out. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/14 "2001-11-12T01:57:09Z")
Why? Because _you_ said so? ---
**Author:** ![GreatKingRat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@GreatKingRat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreatKingRat)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/15 "2001-11-12T01:59:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Anticay \* > \*\*~~Maybe he didn’t say Emily at all… Maybe he said a word > that only sounded like Emily… > “It’s okay–don’t be sorry, reveille…will be at 06:00.” > > Only he didn’t get to the “…will be at…” part… \*\* Like Jimmy or Timmy. ---
**Author:** ![El\_Zagna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@El\_Zagna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Zagna)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/16 "2001-11-12T02:38:53Z")
Whatever you say, Sliver. Whatever you say. I don’t want no trouble. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/17 "2001-11-12T02:42:23Z")
Man, I know it’s easy to jump to conclusions or play “pseudo-psychologist”, but that’s damn creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/18 "2001-11-12T02:42:47Z")
Give the benefit of the doubt. The brain is a strange and tricky thing. The other day I told my mother that I washed and emailed my cat… I thought I was going to say I washed and dried her, but my brain had other ideas. I swear I’m turning into Homer Simpson. [homer]Shut up brain, or I’ll stab you with a Q-tip![/homer] ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/19 "2001-11-12T02:58:58Z")
There’s just no way to tell what this means. I agree with many others here, it’s probably doesn’t mean much. My mom constantly has to recite the names of all three of us girls before she gets to the right name. It seems like she never can call us by our right name the first time. I do that with the cats, with my friends, etc. I just can’t get the name right the first time! If you start noticing other weirdnesses from your boyfriend, _then_ begin to wonder. But if this is it…I wouldn’t freak out about it. (But that’s just me. YMMV.) ---
**Author:** ![Corrvin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbce88/32.png) [@Corrvin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corrvin)\ **Post date:** [November 12, 2001, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827/20 "2001-11-12T03:13:09Z")
I called my boyfriend Steve once, which was not his name. I’ve never dated a Steve, and only know one, who lives in another state, and I’ve never seen him in person. It wasn’t a case of fantasizing about someone else and calling out their name, just some kinda mental hiccup. The boyfriend laughed and responded “Sure thing, Susan.” I wouldn’t worry about the name thing. Many a slip twixt thigh and lip, after all. Corr, who is not named Susan [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-boyfriend-said-his-little-sisters-name-during-sex/92827.md?page=2)