# My brother likes to tell me to "suck it" whenever I talk to him **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 30, 2010, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098 "2010-06-30T18:46:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/1 "2010-06-30T18:46:21Z")
I really, REALLY need a good comeback for that, but I can’t really think of one. You’d think 23 years as a younger brother would have given me better skills, but alas, I have none. I’d prefer it to not be vulgar so I could tell him in front of his son, but if it is, oh well. “no u” is not a good comeback to suck it. I’ve tried that before, it did not work. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/2 "2010-06-30T18:48:11Z")
The really annoying thing about brothers is you can’t use “your mom” as a comeback. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/3 "2010-06-30T18:50:47Z")
Heh, I was playing rummy with my mom and sister last vacation, and my sister said “I don’t know what card to throw”, then a few seconds later it was my mom’s turn and I yelled out “Your MOM doesn’t know what card to throw!” They totally didn’t think that level of meta-humor was funny. ---
**Author:** ![Hedda\_Rosa](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hedda_rosa/32/1204_2.png) [@Hedda\_Rosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hedda_Rosa)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/4 "2010-06-30T18:51:11Z")
“that’s what she said” ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/5 "2010-06-30T18:54:30Z")
“Whip it out.”. Ok so maybe not so good for in front of the kid. ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/6 "2010-06-30T18:57:12Z")
My brother and I toss “Your mom” jokes back and forth at each other. Often in front of her. All of us find it amusing. How about taking the ball and throwing it further? “Nah, not right now - my jaw’s still tired from last night.” ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/7 "2010-06-30T18:57:17Z")
> [@Bosstone](#): > > The really annoying thing about brothers is you can’t use “your mom” as a comeback. That hasn’t really stopped me before. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/8 "2010-06-30T19:02:39Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > I’d prefer it to not be vulgar so I could tell him in front of his son, but if it is, oh well. Not to put too fine a point on it, but isn’t your brother already setting the vulgar standard with the phrase “suck it”? Maybe you should ask him - in front of his son - what “suck it” means. ---
**Author:** ![crazyjoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f14d63/32.png) [@crazyjoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crazyjoe)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/9 "2010-06-30T19:07:20Z")
Yeah, I’m thinking something along the lines of “What should I suck? I don’t see a cup and straw anywhere?” Or something along the variation of “I’d be afraid it would just fall right off, being so tiny and all…” ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/10 "2010-06-30T19:19:19Z")
I wouldn’t feel right insulting the size of his dick either, seeing as how that’s mostly genetically determined. So relative insults and body insults are off the table. How about “your wife” comments or something like that? Maybe “doesn’t your priest do that for you?” ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/11 "2010-06-30T19:23:33Z")
Just turn to the son and tell him “See, nephew, what your father is implying is that he is intending to remove his male organ from his pants and would like me to insert it into my mouth and massage it with my tongue. You should be aware that some grown men like to have other people do that to them. If your father ever tries to do that with you, you should tell your mother and also call the police.” Then an embarassing or irritating incident can turn into a learning experience, and everyone benefits. ---
**Author:** ![crazyjoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f14d63/32.png) [@crazyjoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crazyjoe)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/12 "2010-06-30T19:27:36Z")
Arnold, I like your idea even better than mine. I’d expand the “if your father” part to “If an adult” or something along those lines. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/13 "2010-06-30T19:30:54Z")
‘Present it.’ ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_of\_the\_Lord](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/angel_of_the_lord/32/2949_2.png) [@Angel\_of\_the\_Lord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_of_the_Lord)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/14 "2010-06-30T19:32:48Z")
“You can’t afford it.” ---
**Author:** ![Zhen\_ka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecccb3/32.png) [@Zhen\_ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zhen_ka)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/15 "2010-06-30T19:40:12Z")
“You want it gray, pink or blue?” You know, like meat! ---
**Author:** ![Cross](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2bfe46/32.png) [@Cross](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cross)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/16 "2010-06-30T19:43:45Z")
Sounds like he watches too much pro wrestling. Hit him with a steel chair. ---
**Author:** ![Caveat\_lector\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@Caveat\_lector\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caveat_lector_1)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/17 "2010-06-30T19:46:24Z")
The response that immediately came into my my head would be to say “No, that would be incest and incest is wrong.” In a very matter of fact tone. If you want to be extra evil you can then ask the nephew if he agrees, but that may be too far and I doubt I’d do it. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/18 "2010-06-30T19:52:04Z")
“Find it.” ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/19 "2010-06-30T19:54:16Z")
“Suck it!” “That’s what your mom said last night.” ---
**Author:** ![KinkiNipponTourist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e9bcb4/32.png) [@KinkiNipponTourist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KinkiNipponTourist)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2010, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098/20 "2010-06-30T20:03:11Z")
“grow one first.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-likes-to-tell-me-to-suck-it-whenever-i-talk-to-him/545098.md?page=2)