# My brother passed away last night **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 17, 2022, 9:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698 "2022-12-17T09:09:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 9:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/1 "2022-12-17T09:09:03Z")
My Brother passed away last night. His name was James Dean and he was 14 months younger than me. His health had been very poor for a long time so it wasn’t unexpected, but I still thought I had one more day and so I waited to make the 3 hour trip to go say goodbye. So now it’s after midnight and I’m baking the zucchini bread that his girls love and getting that made is part of the reason I delayed my trip and I feel very bereft. RIP Dean. I’m so sorry your life had such a rotten last few years and I’m grateful that you are no longer suffering and I’m so upset with myself for not coming in time to say goodbye. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 9:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/2 "2022-12-17T09:54:33Z")
{{{hugs}}} I am sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 9:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/3 "2022-12-17T09:56:23Z")
No matter how long or short the end of the trail is, no matter how pleasant or crummy, you’re never ready for it to end. I grieve for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 11:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/4 "2022-12-17T11:30:02Z")
I’m sorry for your loss. I’ve been there. It sucks. {{}} ---
**Author:** ![Paul\_was\_in\_Saudi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b77776/32.png) [@Paul\_was\_in\_Saudi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paul_was_in_Saudi)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/5 "2022-12-17T11:58:19Z")
I do not have any words. I offer you, and all your family my sincere condolences. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/6 "2022-12-17T12:18:01Z")
Very sorry for your loss. Best wishes to your family. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/7 "2022-12-17T12:22:22Z")
I am sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![am77494](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d2c977/32.png) [@am77494](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/am77494)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/8 "2022-12-17T12:23:02Z")
No words here. I feel your grief and hope you get to live the life your brother wanted you to. ---
**Author:** ![Crane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crane/32/3495_2.png) [@Crane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crane)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/9 "2022-12-17T13:00:36Z")
> [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](#): > > I’m baking the zucchini bread A considerate, comforting gift ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/10 "2022-12-17T15:14:49Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > No matter how long or short the end of the trail is, no matter how pleasant or crummy, you’re never ready for it to end. > > I grieve for your loss. This. And no matter how you handled the last hours, you’ll always know you might have done more / different / better than you did. That’s human nature. The fact that feeling is inevitable doesn’t make it correct. The cumulative weeks, months, and years before the final hours matter far more than does the bitter end. We’re all here for you. May his memory live in you with the good times to the fore. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/11 "2022-12-17T15:33:46Z")
Adding my voice to the chorus of condolences. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/12 "2022-12-17T15:37:18Z")
My deepest condolences. May your grief be mercifully brief, but may your memories be sweet and everlasting. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/13 "2022-12-17T15:55:22Z")
My sincere condolences. It’s a hard road that doesn’t get much easier. You’ll always grieve the losses, but it’s more than likely that there was never much you could have done to prevent it. I speak from experience, having lost my brother, sister, a cousin, and worst of all, my 42-year-old son in the past five years. You do what you can, but in the end it just seems inevitable. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/14 "2022-12-17T17:11:06Z")
I’m sorry for your loss. The older I get, the more the losses seem to pile up. StG ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/15 "2022-12-17T17:23:45Z")
I’m very sorry. No matter how much you’re expecting it, it can still take you by surprise. And that goes double or more for the exact timing. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/16 "2022-12-17T19:55:07Z")
I am sorry for your loss, may his memory be a blessing. I lost my brother, and I still will run across a meme or a joke online and want to email it to him. [I will confess, I have a friend who passed Jan 2020 from a heart attack, and I actually still mail his account stuff, and will until it fills up or gets deleted.] ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/17 "2022-12-17T21:39:14Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > And no matter how you handled the last hours, you’ll always know you might have done more / different / better than you did. That’s human nature. The fact that feeling is inevitable doesn’t make it correct. The cumulative weeks, months, and years before the final hours matter far more than does the bitter end. Quoting for truth. We will always have regrets, the missed moments, the “If I only…”. But remember your time as family as a whole, possible blemishes and all and try (when possible) to not let single moments overshadow the rest. May you and all others have the most happy moments going forward and in your memories, and may the pains fade into forgetfulness. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2022, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/18 "2022-12-17T21:48:36Z")
I feel the same. About Grandma, Mom, Dad, and Andy. 😢 ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2022, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/19 "2022-12-18T00:18:04Z")
The list gets long as we get older. 3 grand parents (the other 1 died before I was born), 3 parents / parents in law (the other 1 died before I married into the family), 1 wife, several co-workers, classmates, & friends. Been averaging over 1/yr of late and that’ll probably continue awhile. A man could be forgiven for thinking this living business is dangerous. ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2022, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698/20 "2022-12-18T00:51:44Z")
I grieve with you. May your memories of your brother give you solace. ~VOW [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-brother-passed-away-last-night/976698.md?page=2)