# My Chinese food fortune is the WORST ever!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 10, 2003, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114 "2003-12-10T06:59:02Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\
**Post date:** [December 11, 2003, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114/41 "2003-12-11T18:40:41Z")

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I haven’t gotten a true “fortune” in years. Mainly just Occidental sayings that aren’t even true.

Why don’t you get “You will fall in love on Flag Day.” anymore?

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**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\
**Post date:** [December 11, 2003, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114/42 "2003-12-11T20:38:31Z")

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Yeah, my sister and I HATE the “proverb” fortunes.

I like the “flattery” ones, though, like: “Your charm and wit makes you a natural leader.” I get those all the time.

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**Author:** ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)\
**Post date:** [December 11, 2003, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114/43 "2003-12-11T20:45:23Z")

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My friend got

“A dream might come true.”

Not _your_ dream. And not necessarily a _good_ dream. And, it might not even happen !

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**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\
**Post date:** [December 11, 2003, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114/44 "2003-12-11T21:23:09Z")

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There is a little Chinese restaurant in Greenwich Village in NYC that gives dirty fortunes. Friends have received fortunes such as “Go Fuck yourself” and “you’re never going to amount to anything, asshole.” My last fortune from there said “you’re going to suck the dick of someone sitting at this table” or something like that. They were right.

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**Author:** ![BurnMeUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@BurnMeUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BurnMeUp)\
**Post date:** [December 11, 2003, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-chinese-food-fortune-is-the-worst-ever/218114/45 "2003-12-11T21:32:52Z")

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My running joke for the “in bed” type is to wait until friends or co-workers say "let’s play the “in bed” game and then read their fortunes… then i crack mine open and pretend to read “You have trouble satisfying your partner”

Never fails to get a chuckle.

My wife always gets those damn “You like Chinese food” fortunes…but i think the worst is i read from someone on this board, i forget who, had one that said “there is much love and happiness in your hose”  
. Not only funny… but a typo… what kind of loser are you to get a typo on your fortune cookie?

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