# My Daughter Is Finally Talking. Opinionated Little Brat... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 20, 2007, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032 "2007-02-20T23:49:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/1 "2007-02-20T23:49:27Z")
Sure, she’s been spouting out a word or two here and there…“Mama”, “Dada”, “Bye-bye”, “Boo!”…little things like that. And she’s got the parroting thing down pat. Tell her to say something, and she’ll generally say it, for a minute anyway. But no sentences or anything like that…until today. I was driving her back from the babysitter, as I do every weekday, and as usual I had the radio going and was serenading my little bundle of joy. Standard car radio rules apply: Rule #1: Volume of music and singing increases proportionate to amount of ass a particular song kicks. Rule #2: Actual singing ability is not a consideration. Rule# 3: Singing volume must be kept to a minimum if anyone is in the car with you. Rule #3b: Small children do not count towards Rule #3. So when some Dramarama comes on the radio, Rule #1 goes into full effect. The steering wheel goes into full “drum kit” mode, the amps rise up from the floor, the mic drops down from the ceiling, and the crowd roars. _ **"I’ll give you candy, give you diamonds, give you pills, I’ll give you anything you want, hundred dollar bills!"** _ And a little voice chimes in from the back seat: _“Stop it daddy daddy daddy stop it stop it daddy stop it!”_ Hmph. Everyone’s a fricking critic. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/2 "2007-02-20T23:54:33Z")
You should be happy that she has good taste Hal. Good post, thanks for sharing that. 🙂 . ---
**Author:** ![badkittypriestess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8baadc/32.png) [@badkittypriestess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badkittypriestess)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/3 "2007-02-20T23:56:44Z")
made me giggle with glee! 😃 Cute daughter Hal! ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/4 "2007-02-21T00:01:24Z")
What she meant to say was “FWEEBURD! Daddy sing FWEEBURD!” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![IrreverentTone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@IrreverentTone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IrreverentTone)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/5 "2007-02-21T00:01:41Z")
> [@](#): > > “I’ll give you candy, give you diamonds, give you pills, I’ll give you anything you want, hundred dollar bills!” You should be really delighted that she isn’t a dozen years older and trying to take you up on your incredibly generous offer! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/6 "2007-02-21T00:06:12Z")
Oh like you haven’t been told to knock it off before! 😃 Too cute. I’m sittin’ here laughin’ my butt off… _Stop it daddy daddy daddy_… **bwaaahaaahaaahaaa** ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/7 "2007-02-21T00:21:26Z")
Look on the bright side, Hal: she can’t read the Doe yet. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/8 "2007-02-21T00:57:14Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Carrot] Look on the bright side, Hal: she can’t read the Doe yet. [/QUOTE] Yeah, and Og knows, once she starts reading the Doe, she’ll learn about the Buck, and Elk, and eventually she’ll be reading Caribou and Moose. And that can _only_ mean trouble. ::d&r:: ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/9 "2007-02-21T01:28:26Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Carrot] Look on the bright side, Hal: she can’t read the Doe yet. [/QUOTE] Read the doe? Is that like \*\*Hal \*\*reading the secret desires of sheep? Is the Briston Curse going to be bestiality? …well, if the Littlest Briston is female, and a doe is female, then it’s lesbian-bestiality! ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/10 "2007-02-21T01:32:00Z")
[QUOTE=Anastasaeon] Yeah, and Og knows, once she starts reading the Doe, she’ll learn about the Buck, and Elk, and eventually she’ll be reading Caribou and Moose. And that can _only_ mean trouble. ::d&r:: [/QUOTE] Not the moose!!! ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/11 "2007-02-21T02:48:11Z")
Hehehehehe 🙂 You know what they say, when the kids are babies we’re sooooo eager for them to learn to walk, and to talk. Then they do. :eek: Then we’re eager for them to sit down and shut up 😉 ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/12 "2007-02-21T03:07:01Z")
Aren’t little kids fun? You know she’s going to learn to sing along with some of your songs, right? (Assuming she likes any of them… :D) Just sayin’. GT ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/13 "2007-02-21T03:25:48Z")
**Hal Briston** , first off, how could she be anything less than opinionated, she is, after all, you daughter. 😃 I do feel your pain, however. I’ve always considered myself an undiscovered Streisand. Once I was rocking a sick, little, two year old girl, singing a sweet lullaby. It was late at night, very quiet in the ICU. My dulcet voice was the only sound, when suddenly the devil child shouts, “Don’t _SING_!” while gently patting my mouth. The worse part was, _SHE_ got applause from the other nurses. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/14 "2007-02-21T03:56:51Z")
I’ll never forget **Whiterabbit’s** third birthday party, when in front of about 20 people, all our neighbors, grandparents, etc., as we all starting singing Happy Birthday, the moment I opened my mouth she burst into tears and started sobbing, “No sing, Mommy! No sing!” Ain’t it grand when your kid is a music critic? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/15 "2007-02-21T05:00:35Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] Read the doe? Is that like \*\*Hal \*\*reading the secret desires of sheep? Is the Briston Curse going to be bestiality? …well, if the Littlest Briston is female, and a doe is female, then it’s lesbian-bestiality! [/QUOTE] Damn, that’s a lot better than my original joke! (which I discarded in favor of a typo; in my defense, the letters are adjacent) ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/16 "2007-02-21T05:12:00Z")
If you want, you can piggyback onto it. No, wait…not “piggy” back…I mean…um…go halfsies on that joke. There. Much better. No animal love there, no sir. ---
**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/17 "2007-02-21T06:49:15Z")
[QUOTE=Mama Tiger] I’ll never forget **Whiterabbit’s** third birthday party, when in front of about 20 people, all our neighbors, grandparents, etc., as we all starting singing Happy Birthday, the moment I opened my mouth she burst into tears and started sobbing, “No sing, Mommy! No sing!” [/QUOTE] I used to sing little nonsense songs to my angel while she was riding in the shopping cart at the store. Until the day, when she was about two and a half, that she looked up at me and said, “Shh, Mommy! Don’t sing!” I could tell she was simply mortified by my silly behavior in public. **Hal** , you will find you’ll need to pay closer attention to lyrics for the next sixteen years or so. In fact, there’s still one Liz Phair song my seventeen-year-old (the older version of the moppet just mentioned) will never, ever hear in my presence. And sometimes I reach for the “skip” button even when I’m alone, just out of habit. (I really, really missed the Butthole Surfers and the Red Hot Chili Peppers until my kids got old enough that I could reasonably infer that they’d regularly heard the words in question at school.) ---
**Author:** ![Kal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de053/32.png) [@Kal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kal)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/18 "2007-02-21T06:51:59Z")
Last time I sang, my three year old daughter ran over and clamped her hand over my mouth while ordering: “Don’t sing, Dad! It’s a disgrace!” ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/19 "2007-02-21T07:07:46Z")
My mother got hit from both of her very first grandchildren. She was rocking and singing to my sister’s boy when he put his little hand up and covered her mouth. And somewhere in that same time period, my brother’s daughter looked up from Grandma’s arms and said, “No sing, Grandma, no sing.” Fortunately Grandma had a sense of humor. ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032/20 "2007-02-21T07:13:43Z")
Eep. Welcome to the club, **Hal** From my precious female child, age 4: “Mommy, you have a ‘special’ singing voice. You can only use it on special occasions.” Darling thing. We kept her anyway. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-daughter-is-finally-talking-opinionated-little-brat/393032.md?page=2)