# My dog ate my fucking Keens! \[venting\] **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 16, 2010, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323 "2010-12-16T03:11:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/1 "2010-12-16T03:11:14Z")
Mother Fucker!!! I know it’s my fucking fault, I know I left them for longer than usual … but son of a fucking bitch I come home after leaving them for 11 hours and our new puppy broke into our room during the day, took out my brand new hiking keens and ate them! He fucking ate them!!! Ok I know this is dramatic and not necessarily the truth - they were munched on but not entirely eaten… - and he “ate” half of my wife’s new Keens as well. I LOVE MY HIKING KEENS! THEY ARE GOOD HIKING SHOES AND NOT CHEAP!!! Mother fucking fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!!! … **FUCK**!!! Mother fucking excessive exclamation expletives!! Ok fine… Breathe… I’ve done my anger dance, my cleaning of all the dishes, my UURRRGGHH!!! So, I have 2 weeks off for x-mas…these mother-fucking pups are going to get trained…otherwise… I find one more chapstick or article of clothing “mishandled” and I’m calling the bloody Voggs! ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/2 "2010-12-16T03:28:15Z")
Better keep a close eye over the next couple of days and make sure you see all the parts again if you catch my drift. I had a 70 lb dog this past summer who ate something inappropriate, it got wedged in his innards, he stopped eating and drinking, and in only 10 days he lost 11 lbs and was dead. Don’t fuck around with this. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/3 "2010-12-16T03:37:07Z")
> [@not\_alice](#): > > Better keep a close eye over the next couple of days and make sure you see all the parts again if you catch my drift. > > I had a 70 lb dog this past summer who ate something inappropriate, it got wedged in his innards, he stopped eating and drinking, and in only 10 days he lost 11 lbs and was dead. > > Don’t fuck around with this. HMMM…We’ll watch him… but for now he’s in the “doghouse” as it were. ---
**Author:** ![ShelliBean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@ShelliBean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShelliBean)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/4 "2010-12-16T04:51:41Z")
This is why we can’t have nice things. (channeling a mom vibe…) ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/5 "2010-12-16T05:22:39Z")
Try Sierra Trading Post for replacements. They carry closeout Keens and may or may not have your style, but worth a look. Definitely keep an eye out. If there’s any vomiting in the next couple of days, especially non-productive vomiting where nothing but foamy stomach fluid comes up, or nearly immediate regurgitation of just-eaten food/water, you may have a problem. Other symptoms will be inappetance, diarrhea, and possibly straining to defecate even in the presence of diarrhea. You’ll need to get x-rays done and then if it’s verified there’s something stuck, you will be given options. You should be fairly certain there’s a problem within 24-72 hours, though. It’s tough with puppies, they don’t know better and it’s kinda wrong to get mad, but jeepers! Once the teething is over and all the adult teeth are in, it gets much better. A lot of people don’t realize that puppies really are teething, and since they don’t fuss and cry about it like babies do, they just chew everything they can get their teeth around to make it feel better. Sorry about the Keens. ---
**Author:** ![Kevbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e47774/32.png) [@Kevbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kevbo)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/6 "2010-12-16T05:52:37Z")
I still have the cell phone I finally found half buried in the back yard with puppy teeth marks in it. All of our dogs quit the routine destructive chewing fairly quickly. Puppies need lots of toys that they are allowed to chew. Our latest dog has actually gotten to where she will mouth on soft toys for hours without hurting them. Bitch about your Keens. I have worn out like 3 or 4 pair. I wear a size 14, and these often end up on the clearance rack at REI. Still, I’d trade a new pair for a month with my old lab when he was young and vital. Scuz me, I got somethin’ in my eye. ---
**Author:** ![Gleena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b3f665/32.png) [@Gleena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gleena)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 10:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/7 "2010-12-16T10:51:21Z")
11 hours alone for a new puppy? Pretty sure you’re lucky he just ate your shoes. ---
**Author:** ![auRa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c4cdca/32.png) [@auRa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auRa)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/8 "2010-12-16T11:20:26Z")
> [@Phlosphr](#): > > Mother Fucker!!! I know it’s my fucking fault, I know I left them for longer than usual … but son of a fucking bitch I come home after leaving them **for 11 hours** and our new puppy broke into our room during the day, took out my brand new hiking keens and ate them! He fucking ate them!!! Ok I know this is dramatic and not necessarily the truth - they were munched on but not entirely eaten… - and he “ate” half of my wife’s new Keens as well. 11 hours??! How old is this puppy? 11 hours is way too long to leave even an adult dog on its own, let alone a pup. I’m not surprised it got into mischief. ---
**Author:** ![elninost0rm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ed655f/32.png) [@elninost0rm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elninost0rm)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/9 "2010-12-16T12:30:40Z")
> [@not\_alice](#): > > Better keep a close eye over the next couple of days and make sure you see all the parts again if you catch my drift. > > I had a 70 lb dog this past summer who ate something inappropriate, it got wedged in his innards, he stopped eating and drinking, and in only 10 days he lost 11 lbs and was dead. > > Don’t fuck around with this. [hijack] You didn’t notice in a 10-day window? 😕 [/hijack] ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/10 "2010-12-16T12:51:21Z")
Next time keep your Keens Somewhere Only You Know. ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/11 "2010-12-16T13:04:35Z")
Where do you store your chapstick that a puppy could reach it? And I too would love to hear why you think it’s OK the leave a puppy alone for 11 hours. ---
**Author:** ![HongKongFooey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c4cdca/32.png) [@HongKongFooey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HongKongFooey)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/12 "2010-12-16T13:14:01Z")
Maybe owning a dog isn’t for you. ---
**Author:** ![Phlosphr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Phlosphr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phlosphr)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/13 "2010-12-16T14:31:15Z")
He’s a 50 pound Siberian Husky \ Border Collie Mix, 8 months old. He broke into our room = which has a latch type door handle on it, not a regular one you turn…He’s never done that before. He’s got our other dog to keep him company, so…there’s that. And yes, we’ll watch his eating and such. NOw after having slept on it, I’m still pissed about the keens but not so much at the pup. He is just a pup. Oh and I shop at Sierra Trading post all the time. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/14 "2010-12-16T14:36:00Z")
> [@HongKongFooey](#): > > Maybe owning a dog isn’t for you. What the fuck? He’s not throwing the dog away - he’s just pissed the dog ate his shoes, and blames himself for that happening. This is typical SDMB bullshit - any suggestion that you’re not the perfect animal owner 100% of the time, and someone has to drive by with the douchebag comment of “maybe you’re not cut out to own a dog” or some shit. ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/15 "2010-12-16T14:51:30Z")
> [@Phlosphr](#): > > He’s a 50 pound Siberian Husky \ Border Collie Mix, 8 months old. He broke into our room = which has a latch type door handle on it, not a regular one you turn…He’s never done that before. He’s got our other dog to keep him company, so…there’s that. And yes, we’ll watch his eating and such. NOw after having slept on it, I’m still pissed about the keens but not so much at the pup. He is just a pup. > > Oh and I shop at Sierra Trading post all the time. Hoooo-eee, that’s going to be a high-strung, energetic type. Best to have a (thoroughly) fenced in yard, unless it’s going to be bitter cold, or else a crate, at least for the puppy years. I bet he’s just beautiful, though. ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/16 "2010-12-16T14:55:02Z")
Yeah - dogs can do that! I had one destroy a remote control, a book, a box of kleenex and a full 12-pack of soda. All in one day. The soda was our fault for leaving it in the kitchen, on the floor. We came back to dried on soda all over the floors, cabinets and walls. What a fucking mess. The rest of it was not our fault, the little fucker jumped the gate. Min-pins are small, but very destructive without the right distractions. Sorry to hear about the keens - I love mine and I know how pissed I’d be if they got chewed up! ---
**Author:** ![PlainJain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5daacb/32.png) [@PlainJain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PlainJain)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/17 "2010-12-16T15:43:57Z")
> [@Munch](#): > > What the fuck? He’s not throwing the dog away - he’s just pissed the dog ate his shoes, and blames himself for that happening. This is typical SDMB bullshit - any suggestion that you’re not the perfect animal owner 100% of the time, and someone has to drive by with the douchebag comment of “maybe you’re not cut out to own a dog” or some shit. Did you read the OP? He’s more than a little pissed and he’s got a lot more in store. HKF didn’t suggest the OP was a bad person to animals, only that if stuff like this causes you this much frustration maybe a dog isn’t the right pet for you. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/18 "2010-12-16T15:46:04Z")
I’d probably have to be physically restrained if that happened to me. Maybe. I had a dog that took down our Christmas tree one year, tore open a present that contained a new briar pipe and chewed on it contentedly. Then tore open a Christmas stocking that my sister had sent, ripped open a bag of catnip that she had put in there for the cat, and the two of them got stoned out of their minds. The dog got the runs and sprayed dogshit everywhere while the cat hallucinated. What a happy homecoming. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/19 "2010-12-16T15:49:50Z")
I’m reminded of a few cases where the dog tore through a door and one where a dog tore through a wall. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2010, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323/20 "2010-12-16T15:56:32Z")
> [@PlainJain](#): > > Did you read the OP? He’s more than a little pissed and he’s got a lot more in store. HKF didn’t suggest the OP was a bad person to animals, only that if stuff like this causes you this much frustration maybe a dog isn’t the right pet for you. W. T. F? How do you logically get from “Upset and frustrated because brand new valued possessions have been destroyed” to “Shouldn’t have a dog”? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-dog-ate-my-fucking-keens-venting/564323.md?page=2)