# My 'friend' dumped me because I'm an Atheist. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 14, 2004, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321 "2004-06-14T17:52:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/41 "2004-06-15T07:50:17Z")
> [@MGibson](#): > > Why shouldn’t it? Meaningful friendships are based on shared interest, values, and mutual admiration. Oh, bullshit. I’ve had plenty of friends with whom I disagreed about a great many things. Sure, there’s lots of commonalities, but we don’t have to agree about _every damn thing_. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/42 "2004-06-15T10:06:38Z")
> [@Yeticus Rex](#): > > What a narrow view…almost a…\…bigoted view itself? Ah, but I don’t have a problem with religious _people_. Sure, I may not agree with them, but I have never tried to force my views on them and I certainly wouldn’t end a friendship just because I found out a person went to church every Sunday. My post expressed my opinion, but it’s fine by me if others disagree. I like to think of it as “apatheism” - the conviction that there are far more important things to care about than who believes what. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/43 "2004-06-15T10:24:19Z")
I may be wrong, but it sounds like there might be a little more to this than meets the eye; perhaps your friend has recently come under some sort of special pressure from her church to ‘win souls’ or some other ‘issue’. Doesn’t excuse what she did though. Although I’m a believer myself, I really don’t understand why some people think it is OK or even a little bit helpful to try to force someone to believe; quite apart from the social stupidity of it, it doesn’t make any sense from the freewill issue of faith either. Discussion and argument is fine, even sometimes _fun_, but forcing the issue like that is just silly and immature; don’t worry about it. ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/44 "2004-06-15T10:29:48Z")
I haven’t posted much recently because a very dear friend has been staying with me for the past few weeks. He’s a Wiccan. I am a devout, church-going Episcopalian (by the way, **Colophon** , please excuse me while I peer out from between the bristles of the brush you’ve painted me with). One of the things both of us value most about our friendship is the discussions we have about theology and related topics including ethics. I freely admit that I am a better and stronger Christian because of this friendshp and the discussions that we’ve had. **Flamingbananas** , I’m sorry your friend didn’t see what she was missing. On the other hand, it’s been a long time since I was a teenager, and my beliefs are pretty solid. I also can’t tell you how many times my friend and I said, “Now, I’m not trying to convert you.” in the early stages of our friendship. We wanted to make absolutely sure that the other person knew that telling them what we believed and why was not an attempt at conversion, but explanation. Maybe **Flamingbananas** friend is worried that **Flamingbananas** will try to damage her faith. Maybe she’s been told that non-Christians cannot be good people and she doesn’t want to deal with finding out that may not be true. When I was more on a Christian message board, I read posts from people who sincerely believed that Christians should not associate with non-Christians. It’s obviously not a position I agree with but it exists, and perhaps it’s one of **Flamingbananas** ’ friends’ church’s teachings. Whatever the reason, losing the friendship does suck, and I’m sorry it happened. On the other hand, I agree that you’re better off finding that out now. By the way, that friend I mentioned in the first paragraph is coming to the Central PA Dopefest, so with him, me, **Polycarp** , **Iampunha** , **Triskademus** , **norinew** etc. coming, I expect there’s going to be a _good_ discussion of theology, not that I’m trying to lure anyone into changing their minds about joining us. _cough_ gobear _cough_😉 CJ ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/45 "2004-06-15T11:12:04Z")
So, **Milum** , you moronic chickenshit full of pubescent confusion, how come you’re still posting here? Didn’t you “grow tired of tiny house dogs nipping at your heels”? You’re beyond pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Milum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ea666f/32.png) [@Milum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milum)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/46 "2004-06-15T11:54:10Z")
Hey \*\* Priceguy\*\*, good to hear from you, goodbuddy! Where in the world have you been hanging? Me? I’ll go anywhere to help someone who needs to hear the truth and not a sring of pacifying words with no substance. Even to depths of this vile pit full of small town jerks and fools. Lel’s do lunch. ---
**Author:** ![Denis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/5e9695/32.png) [@Denis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Denis)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/47 "2004-06-15T12:16:31Z")
**Milum** , you are _not_ helping anybody here, unless you just want to offer proof of what a jerk you are. ---
**Author:** ![Brandus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@Brandus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brandus)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/48 "2004-06-15T14:33:50Z")
Hahahaha… that’s hilarious Milum. I think you guys are taking him too seriously. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/49 "2004-06-15T15:11:32Z")
No, I think cows are more agnostic than anything else. Dogs, OTOH, are theists. **Milum** , you crack me up. Robin ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/50 "2004-06-15T15:33:34Z")
> [@Milum](#): > > I’ll go anywhere to help someone who needs to hear the truth and not a sring of pacifying words with no substance. Even to depths of this vile pit full of small town jerks and fools. You’ve made me see the light. From now on, all my posts will be positive. I’m positive you’re a schmuck. ---
**Author:** ![Omega\_Glory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/7c8e57/32.png) [@Omega\_Glory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omega_Glory)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/51 "2004-06-15T16:02:18Z")
I can kind of see where the girl is coming from. If someone starts spouting off half-baked theories when I meet them then I’m going to be cautious about investing a lot into the relationship. I consider myself to be pretty tolerant, but there are some beliefs that will cause me to evaluate my relationship with people that I’ve known for a few weeks too. This girl just has a different threshold for what she’s willing to accept. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/52 "2004-06-15T16:43:06Z")
> [@MsRobyn](#): > > No, I think cows are more agnostic than anything else. Dogs, OTOH, are theists. > > Robin I’m a dyslexic agnostic. I’m not sure dogs exist. ---
**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/53 "2004-06-15T18:43:06Z")
You guys are talking about “cults” and I’m not part of one. I just don’t believe in any God, therefore I label myself as an Atheist. Religion is not a part of my life what so ever, and I will not talk about my “religious faith” unless another forces upon the subject. BTW, I was reading Salem’s Lot the other day, and pretty much, you have to be Catholic to be protected from vampires. What about me? ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [June 15, 2004, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/54 "2004-06-15T21:44:26Z")
> [@Q.E.D.](#): > > Oh, bullshit. I’ve had plenty of friends with whom I disagreed about a great many things. Sure, there’s lots of commonalities, but we don’t have to agree about _every damn thing_. I also have disagreements about a variety of topics with many of my friends and loved ones. Keeping that in mind there are certain traits I would not tolerate in someone I would call a friend. Marc ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/55 "2004-06-16T01:25:09Z")
> [@Colophon](#): > > Ah, but I don’t have a problem with religious _people_. Sure, I may not agree with them, but I have never tried to force my views on them and I certainly wouldn’t end a friendship just because I found out a person went to church every Sunday. My post expressed my opinion, but it’s fine by me if others disagree. Likewise, so lighten up on the rhetoric…your generalized view of religious folk is skewed. I have never cracked on anyone for any religious or non-religious views that they may have, but have no problem discussing each other’s views if there is a mutual agreement to do so. ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/56 "2004-06-16T10:54:51Z")
> [@Milum](#): > > Where in the world have you been hanging? Right here. > [@](#): > > Me? I’ll go anywhere to help someone who needs to hear the truth and not a sring of pacifying words with no substance. Even to depths of this vile pit full of small town jerks and fools. I can’t wait for you to grow up and realize these words you wrote in your adolescence won’t ever go away. ---
**Author:** ![Milum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ea666f/32.png) [@Milum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milum)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/57 "2004-06-16T11:40:33Z")
**Priceguy** :\* I can’t wait for you to grow up and realize these words you wrote in your adolescence won’t ever go away.\* * * * Hey Priceguy, good news, you want have to wait, this is your lucky day. 🙂 I am 35 years old and in the 23 grade. 🙂 The reason you thought I was young is because I like to hang around with young folks so I can always be the brightest bulb in a dim batch. I do pray to high Heaven that the words that I wrote in my adolesence went away. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don’t. So my advise to you, Priceguy, is to watch what you write. Later Dude. ---
**Author:** ![SentientMeat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/43a26b/32.png) [@SentientMeat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SentientMeat)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/58 "2004-06-16T11:59:02Z")
> [@](#): > > The reason you thought I was young is because I like to hang around with > young folks so I can always be the brightest bulb in a dim batch. I’m sure there are many voluntary community programs where you can feel _incredibly_ gifted compared to those around you. ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/59 "2004-06-16T12:14:44Z")
> [@Milum](#): > > The reason you thought I was young is because I like to hang around with > young folks so I can always be the brightest bulb in a dim batch. > Later Dude. Milum, you are a constant source of amusement. Really. I mean, even a 40-watt bulb is brighter than a 25-watt bulb. Asshole. Robin ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2004, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321/60 "2004-06-16T12:32:50Z")
> [@MsRobyn](#): > > Milum, you are a constant source of amusement. “Sadness” is a better word. I mean, if the guy is really 35… he needs some serious help. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-dumped-me-because-im-an-atheist/250321.md?page=2)