# My friend just got robbed **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [November 20, 2012, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588 "2012-11-20T05:23:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/1 "2012-11-20T05:23:25Z")
So here’s the scoop. My friend got robbed earlier today. Someone took about $1,100 in a safe and a big portion of the jewelry in the house. My friend lives with his mom. They both had things stolen. There was no damage done. No signs of breaking and entering. It looks like someone knew the garage code and just walked right in. My friend thinks (Lets call him Bill) our other friend (Rich) did it. Rich has a drug problem with pills, mostly vicodin and things like that. He’ll pretty much snort whatever he can get his hands on. We don’t know how bad it is but we know it’s there. Rich just moved back from Vegas and has no job. A lot of the signs point to Rich. Even the cops say it’s usually somebody you know. Otherwise, it seems like a totally random event which seems unlikely. Rich has been one of my best friends for a long time. I don’t know what to make of this or what to do. I want to help out my friend Bill, but it feels wrong to go after my friend Rich like this. Thoughts? ---
**Author:** ![Indian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@Indian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indian)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/2 "2012-11-20T05:34:14Z")
Let the cops investigate and find the thief. And… …your head should be above your heart in this matter. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/3 "2012-11-20T05:37:26Z")
I’d go for the “get tough on crime” approach. Anybody who’d rob a friend or a relative has thrown away any sympathy, any consideration, you might have left for them. They aren’t a friend any more. Stand by them, when they get to court. Be there for them when they’re in prison. But do the right thing. If you have reason to believe he’s the burglar, tell the police. Hell, you might even end up saving his life. What if he tries it again at someone else’s home? And what if that homeowner is armed? ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/4 "2012-11-20T05:38:34Z")
This is a matter of knowledge of and access to a SAFE…this is definitely someone you know. Let the cops do their jobs, and cooperate. Sure, ‘Rich’ could be innocent, and maybe he is. Either clear him ASAP or catch him ASAP. Either way, don’t sneak him out of the equation because you’d feel guilty; you’d feel a helluva lot guiltier later when he did it again. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/5 "2012-11-20T05:51:29Z")
I don’t have anything to add, I just found it curious that your friend keeps that much cash at home. Is it like a survival fund or something? Does he not have a bank account? ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/6 "2012-11-20T05:54:56Z")
Cops have already been called. There really isn’t anything I can do but lend my friend some support. I don’t think it would be knowledge of a safe. He’s been over once or twice since he’s been back, but I don’t think he really had an opportunity to go exploring. It seems more likely he stumbled upon it during the robbery. My friend Bill thinks it might be a good idea to just invite Rich over one of these nights to see how he might react. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/7 "2012-11-20T05:56:02Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I don’t have anything to add, I just found it curious that your friend keeps that much cash at home. Is it like a survival fund or something? Does he not have a bank account? It’s the mother who keeps it there. I have no idea why. ---
**Author:** ![FlyByNight512](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/82dd89/32.png) [@FlyByNight512](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyByNight512)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/8 "2012-11-20T06:45:32Z")
> [@Scotty Mo](#): > > I want to help out my friend Bill, but it feels wrong to go after my friend Rich like this. IMHO the best - and often only - thing you can do for an addict is to not shelter them from the consequences of their actions. If Rich has enough of a problem to be stealing from friends, mentioning him to the police is not ‘going after him’, but probably the best thing you can do for him. It sucks, yes, but letting an addiction continue to wreck his life will suck worse. It sounds like Bill has things well in hand. Very unpleasant situation, I wish you and both your friends the best. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/9 "2012-11-20T12:21:32Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I don’t have anything to add, I just found it curious that your friend keeps that much cash at home. Is it like a survival fund or something? Does he not have a bank account? Wife and I have approximately that much cash at home (in a safe, along with various critical documents). It’s accumulated over several years, and now we regard it as an emergency fund in case of a major disaster, e.g. Hurricane Sandy. If power craps out for a few weeks, it may be difficult to get cash from an ATM, and credit-card purchases would be equally difficult; cash (and barter, I suppose) will be the only viable medium of exchange until electrical services get restored. It’s also handy on an occasional basis to be able to grab cash in an instant instead of having to swing by an ATM that may be inconvenient - for example, when the pizza will be here in 15 minutes and there’s no cash in my wallet. In the case of the OP’s friend, I’m wondering how the safe was accessed without damage. In our case, only my wife and I (and one trusted out-of-state relative) know the combination; a thief would have to spend considerable time and effort tearing it apart to get into it. Will echo what others have to say: this is a matter best left up to the police, with the full cooperation of your friend. I wouldn’t make any suggestions to the drug addict that he is suspected, lest he dispose of any evidence/wealth, rendering it forever unrecoverable. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/10 "2012-11-20T13:15:20Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I don’t have anything to add, I just found it curious that your friend keeps that much cash at home. Is it like a survival fund or something? Does he not have a bank account? I like to have cash handy. I keep a Benjamin hidden in my wallet besides whatever cash I carry. In my underwear drawer I typically have five hundred or so. A few times it has helped me out, but it’s mostly just mental comfort, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/11 "2012-11-20T13:34:11Z")
> [@Scotty Mo](#): > > My friend Bill thinks it might be a good idea to just invite Rich over one of these nights to see how he might react. This seems like an incredibly bad idea. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/12 "2012-11-20T14:00:11Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > This seems like an incredibly bad idea. Please elaborate. And apparently they just picked up the whole safe and took it. It was a briefcase type one? I’m not sure I’ve never seen it. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/13 "2012-11-20T14:13:08Z")
Do not, either you or your friend, turn on Rich. You can stop having him by the house, as his circumstances have caused you to be distrustful of him. But to convict him before you are certain, is foolish. Perhaps it was one of his druggie friends even. Not the point. Let the police investigate the crime. They will be much better at it than you both. Give them time for a thorough investigation and see what shakes out, before making up your mind. If the investigation is inconclusive, try not to blame Rich. It’s not just addicts who commit crimes of opportunity. Some sticky fingered others may have simply picked up on the fact there was an addict in and out of the place, and recognized that anything getting stolen, would surely get blamed on him. Don’t be sure you ‘know’ just yet. Try not to let your emotions over ride your reason. What you do ‘know’ is that, rightly or wrongly, you’ve lost trust in your addict friend. That’s enough for you to keep him away from the place, in future. Does the Mom have caregivers or cleaning ladies coming in? ---
**Author:** ![gwendee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/35a633/32.png) [@gwendee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gwendee)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/14 "2012-11-20T14:35:56Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I don’t have anything to add, I just found it curious that your friend keeps that much cash at home. Is it like a survival fund or something? Does he not have a bank account? An elderly relative of mine had bank accounts, managed investment accounts and all sorts of responsibly handled finances. She also put $10 or $20 cash from EVERY paycheck somewhere in her house. When my family helped her move to assisted living they found over $12k in 10s and 20s, most of it tucked under a drop leaf of a dining room table. When asked why she said “What if someone has an emergency when the banks are closed?” (It _was_ before ATMs were prevalent…) Now, back to the thread… ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/15 "2012-11-20T14:50:34Z")
Was the safe unlocked? Does Rich know how to crack one? Is there a Post-It with the combination stuck to the front of it? ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/16 "2012-11-20T14:58:08Z")
> [@Scotty Mo](#): > > And apparently they just picked up the whole safe and took it. It was a briefcase type one? I’m not sure I’ve never seen it. If it’s one of those type safes, then based on my extensive watching of Storage Wars, it will just pop open if you drop it on the corner, on a concrete floor. BTW, I hope that Bill is changing the combo on the garage door, and perhaps changing the locks to the house. And as for $1,100 at home, it’s really not that much. As others mentioned I keep a similar sum in my apartment specifically for emergencies. ---
**Author:** ![Desert\_Nomad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desert_nomad/32/177_2.png) [@Desert\_Nomad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desert_Nomad)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/17 "2012-11-20T14:59:07Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > I don’t have anything to add, I just found it curious that your friend keeps that much cash at home. Is it like a survival fund or something? Does he not have a bank account? $1100 is not much to keep at home. I normally keep at least $5000 at home (in various currencies). ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/18 "2012-11-20T15:17:40Z")
> [@Scotty Mo](#): > > And apparently they just picked up the whole safe and took it. It was a briefcase type one? I’m not sure I’ve never seen it. Have seen these types. They are primarily protection against fire (and sometimes flood), [like this one.](http://www.amazon.com/SentrySafe-H2300-Fire-Safe-Waterproof-Silver/dp/B000LJOX94/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1353424206&sr=8-2&keywords=fire+safe) The locking mechanism isn’t high-security, as it’s not intended to offer much protection against theft, especially since the whole thing can easily be carried away and worked on at the thief’s leisure; it’s mostly just there to hold the lid shut while the outside world burns or floods. For real protection against theft, you need to buy something like [this](http://www.costco.com/Sentry%c2%aeSafe-Biometric-Fire-Safe.product.11755000.html) (what we have), and you need to bolt it down to something solid in your house. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Tildrum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e95f7d/32.png) [@Tom\_Tildrum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Tildrum)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/19 "2012-11-20T15:27:42Z")
How does Bill think Rich got in the house? I keep thinking of them as Big & Rich, the country act. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2012, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588/20 "2012-11-20T15:35:28Z")
> [@Tom\_Tildrum](#): > > How does Bill think Rich got in the house? > > I keep thinking of them as Big & Rich, the country act. Because he thinks Rich knew the garage code. In fact, that’s the main reason because there were no signs of a break in. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-friend-just-got-robbed/641588.md?page=2)