# My Grandpa died this morning, and I'm so happy. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 9, 2005, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681 "2005-03-09T16:22:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Kitchen\_Wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f08c70/32.png) [@Kitchen\_Wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kitchen_Wench)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/1 "2005-03-09T16:22:42Z")
Sorry if this ends up being all jumbled up. I’m a tad emotional right now. Grandpa was diagnosed with Level 4 Melanoma in his brain in late September, early October. He had surgery to remove the mass, but we were warned that the “feelers” of the cancer would grow, and he wouldn’t be with us for very long. Grandpa came home in November (he lived with my Aunt, Uncle & Cousin), and was signed up with a wonderful Hospice here in town. The nurses who came to visit soon fell for his sweet disposition, his charm and warmth. At this time, his communication, coordination and balance weren’t very good. It was then that I started spending the weekdays with him. I made his breakfast and lunch, gave him manicures and foot rubs, and helped him in the bathroom. He loved to be pampered! 🙂 He made astounding progress in quick time, and became more independent and conversational. We talked about his time as a POW in Germany, what his childhood was like, and how he and Grandma met. They loved swing dancing at a local hall. When I asked if he’d ever met General Patton, he said, “Yep. He told me I was a tough son of a bitch!” with a grin. We listened to his favorite cowboy songs, and watched Westerns. About 3 weeks ago, he started showing signs of the cancer’s return. Before he was bed ridden, one night he put on his hat and told mom that he needed to go home and tell Katherine (his wife) to start dinner. Periodically, he’d see or talk to Grandma. And then, he declined rapidly. But with the wonderful nurses’ care, he was never in pain. He died with dignity and peace. But here’s the thing… Today is Grandma and Grandpa’s **anniversary**. He went home to Grandma to wish her a happy anniversary. And that, my friends, is why I’m so happy. Will I miss him? More than you’ll ever know. But I know he got what he’s wanted for 2 years: To be with his Katherine. I bet they’re going out dancing tonight. I love you, Grandpa. Hugs and Kisses. Holly ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/2 "2005-03-09T17:06:57Z")
He’s free. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/3 "2005-03-09T17:10:06Z")
{{{hugs}}} I’m sorry your grandfather is gone but I’m sure he and your grandmother are partying together right now! It sounds like you and the rest of the family made his last few months joyful, and treasured your time with him. And in the grand scheme of things, what more can we ask for when we’re gone, than that our family remembers us with love. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/4 "2005-03-09T17:11:32Z")
_hugs for a long while_ ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/5 "2005-03-09T17:17:49Z")
**Seeker74** I’m so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers. That was a beautiful tribute. He’s a lucky man to have had you to love and take care of him. I wish you peace and strength. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/6 "2005-03-09T18:06:51Z")
I remember you telling me about your grandfather when you and I emailed one another a few months ago and I am happy to hear his last few months were so peaceful as he sounds like he was a wonderful guy. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/7 "2005-03-09T18:36:43Z")
What a lovely story. I’m smiling even though I have tears in my eyes. Peace to you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![Kitchen\_Wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f08c70/32.png) [@Kitchen\_Wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kitchen_Wench)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/8 "2005-03-09T18:50:33Z")
**Bosda** - Yes, he’s free! And I’m so happy for him! **Mama Zappa** - You don’t know how many times my Auntie, Mom & myself have said that every day with him after the surgery was a true gift. He was 81, fer chrissakes! For someone that age to recover so completely is something. I had the fortune of being unemployed so I got to be the one to care for him. And I was able to love him just as hard as I could during those days. I will always cherish them. **Kythereia** - Thank you, dear. **swampbear** - Thank you for your prayers. I feel like I was the lucky one to take care of him. He was such a great old guy! **Aesiron** - God, I wish I could sum him up in a few short words. He was one of those guys who you just like in an instant. He’d watch movies with the original hard core guys like Lee Marvin and John Wayne… But then he’d get misty at the chick flicks. He had true grit, through and through… But then he had a heart like a marshmallow. When my cousin and I were little, we’d pounce on him and search his pockets every day, saying “Grandpa! What did you bring us!?” And there would ALWAYS be a mint or a quarter or something. Man, that makes me smile. **twickster** - The significance of Grandpa dying on their anniversary is big thing in my family. I told Mom that it’s the ultimate romantic thing. And we have absolutely no doubt that Grandma’s been in the house, talking to him. It _is_ a lovely story. One that my grandchildren will hear. Sorry to gush on. And it seems wrong to be happy about someone’s death. But the thing is, I just know he’s with Grandma now. I’m not religious. I don’t have any beliefs about God or whatever. But there’s just something telling me that they’re together again, but not as old people. I think they’re as they were when they were 20, full of life, having fun & doing the jitterbug. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/9 "2005-03-09T19:08:27Z")
A very touching tribute. Here’s to your Grandpa ::Raises mug:: And to you :: Raises mug:: Sending supporting thoughts your way. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/10 "2005-03-09T21:09:42Z")
Glad you got the chance to connect so strongly at the end. Thanks for sharing with us. ---
**Author:** ![OtakuLoki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@OtakuLoki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OtakuLoki)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/11 "2005-03-09T23:22:52Z")
Holly, What a wonderful story. It’s great to have you celebrating your grandfather. Thank you. And a big hug from me, too. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2005, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/12 "2005-03-09T23:30:27Z")
Godspeed gramps! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kitchen\_Wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f08c70/32.png) [@Kitchen\_Wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kitchen_Wench)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/13 "2005-03-10T02:39:19Z")
Just talked to Mom. She said that Grandpa’s POW buddies are going to give him a final salute at the visitation. And his lodge brothers will perform some kind of ceremony, too. Grandpa’s getting a big send off. 😃 Thank goodness it won’t be the usual, stand around and try to make idle chit chat with people you barely know. I’m no good at that type of thing (notice my modest post count). She also said that she and my auntie bought some kind of memory container that fits into the casket. They’re going to put in a note saying “Happy Anniversary.” Thanks for all your warm thoughts. It means a lot to me. ---
**Author:** ![MagicEyes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@MagicEyes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MagicEyes)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/14 "2005-03-10T03:48:34Z")
**Seeker74** , I’m sorry to hear about your grandpa, but it’s good that you got to spend some time with him and he went peacefully. I had kind of the same experience with my granddad–he was 95 when he died, and it felt like it was okay. I cried a lot, and it was sad, but it wasn’t heart-wrenchingly awful and it didn’t feel wrong that he was gone. He had a good life, he lived longer than the doctors expected him too, and his birthday was the week before, so all the grandkids went to visit him or called him, and I know he felt loved and appreciated. I’m glad he lived as long as he did. Thinking good thoughts for you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/15 "2005-03-10T03:52:54Z")
What a beautiful story. I’m in tears 🙂 I wish your grandparents a happy, happy anniversary! ---
**Author:** ![Abbie\_Carmichael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/49beb7/32.png) [@Abbie\_Carmichael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abbie_Carmichael)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/16 "2005-03-10T04:13:29Z")
Wow, what a great way to go! Seriously – dignity, no pain, and just when it ends you’re greeted by your sweetheart, on your anniversary of all days. Everyone should go out like that 🙂 He sounds like he was so cool. I bet he’s having a ball as we sit here and talk about him. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/17 "2005-03-10T06:43:08Z")
Sweet. Congratulations on getting the opportunity to see what a good death looks like. My grandfather’s was similar - cancer, good long life, all his loved ones around him on his deathbed after 4 months at home in hospice care. He lived about 6 years after he was given a 6 month prognosis by the doctors. He had always joked with my grandmother that he loved her very much, but 50 years of marriage was all she was getting out of his bachelor bones! And sure enough, he died the day after their 50th anniversary. Your grandfather sounds like a wonderful man, and I’m so happy for you that you got to know him better before he left. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/18 "2005-03-10T07:01:55Z")
I gotta get off the Internet and go give my wife a big hug and tell her how special she is. Right now. ---
**Author:** ![Kitchen\_Wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f08c70/32.png) [@Kitchen\_Wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kitchen_Wench)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 10:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/19 "2005-03-10T10:22:24Z")
Like my cousin did when Grandma died, and I did when Dad died, we’ll be putting together a photo study of Grandpa’s life displayed on a 3 paneled foam core board. So we’re going through Grandma & Grandpa’s photos today. We’ll be collecting pics of Grandpa from childhood, to adolescence, being married & going off to war, pics of his twin daughters & all his grandkids and great grandkids, etc. His most recent photo was taken about a year ago. I can’t wait to see all the old photos again. I wish I had this one photo of my Grandparents to show you guys. When I look at it, I hear the Glenn Miller band playing. And what a handsome couple, too. I’ll be putting a card in the casket with Grandpa at the funeral, just as I did with Grandma. **Washoe** - I’ve been telling everyone I’ve talked to that I love them. The timing of Grandpa’s death has made me especially lovey toward my family and close friends. It’s a good thing. ---
**Author:** ![Scribble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scribble/32/3317_2.png) [@Scribble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribble)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2005, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681/20 "2005-03-10T12:04:01Z")
I know it’s trite, but… {{{{ **Seeker74** }}}} I’m glad to hear you and your grandpa had that period of closeness before he passed. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-grandpa-died-this-morning-and-im-so-happy/293681.md?page=2)