# My husband is getting a Lump of Coal this year. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 14, 2007, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985 "2007-12-14T12:48:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/1 "2007-12-14T12:48:39Z")
[Lump of Coal](http://www.sheltonbrothers.com/beers/beerProfile.asp?BeerID=151) I am the bestest wifey. ( found it at Costplus market place. 5.99) ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/2 "2007-12-14T14:32:46Z")
I’ve seen this in a gift pack with other weird Christmas-themed beers ( **Santa’s Butt** , something like **Grouchy Elf** ). I’d get it for the novelty value, but I hate beer and related beverages. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/3 "2007-12-14T14:37:45Z")
Now if “a Lump of Coal” was a euphimism for… say… wild, crazy, sweaty, 4-hour-long sex, I’d agree you were the bestest wifey. If’n you’re getting him the six-pack, you’re an great wifey but not the bestest. ---
**Author:** ![fessie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@fessie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fessie)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/4 "2007-12-14T14:43:03Z")
“Is that a lump of coal, or are you just happy to see me?” ---
**Author:** ![Savannah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b3f665/32.png) [@Savannah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Savannah)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/5 "2007-12-14T15:45:39Z")
My mother found little packages of “lumps of coal” one Christmas, in a little red mesh bag. She put it in my little brother’s stocking. It was the only item he got… until he found the note that pointed to where the “real” stocking was. The expression on his face… Well, it was funny. Wouldn’t have been funny without the “real” stocking, though, which he found in very short order. (I don’t like mean practical jokes.) ---
**Author:** ![Buckwheat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/97f17d/32.png) [@Buckwheat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buckwheat)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/6 "2007-12-14T16:02:41Z")
It’s from “Belchertown”. Funny. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/7 "2007-12-14T16:08:41Z")
[QUOTE=Savannah] My mother found little packages of “lumps of coal” one Christmas, in a little red mesh bag. She put it in my little brother’s stocking. It was the only item he got… until he found the note that pointed to where the “real” stocking was. The expression on his face… Well, it was funny. Wouldn’t have been funny without the “real” stocking, though, which he found in very short order. (I don’t like mean practical jokes.) [/QUOTE] Now they have “lump of coal” bubblegum. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/8 "2007-12-14T20:01:53Z")
[QUOTE=TroubleAgain] Now they have “lump of coal” bubblegum. 😃 [/QUOTE] [And chocolate.](http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.maramor.com/images/lump.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.maramor.com/wholesale/sampleC.html&h=400&w=300&sz=31&hl=en&start=1&um=1&tbnid=-lczpjWMI1zeIM:&tbnh=124&tbnw=93&prev=/images%3Fq%3D%2522lump%2Bof%2Bcoal%2522%2Bchocolate%26svnum%3D10%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN) ---
**Author:** ![mikemo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/41988e/32.png) [@mikemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mikemo)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2007, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/9 "2007-12-14T20:25:14Z")
Will you marry me, **Shirley**? If my wife tells me she’s getting me a lump of coal, I’m not expecting a bottle! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![flodnak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/838e76/32.png) [@flodnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flodnak)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 9:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/10 "2007-12-15T09:26:44Z")
My nanny loved anthracite candy, which if I remember right is a strongly licorice-flavored hard candy. (She also used to eat up all my black jelly beans.) One year Mom asked Nanny what she wanted for Christmas and Nanny said, nothing really, except maybe a box of anthracite candy. “You want me to give my own mother a stocking full of coal?!?” asked the flodmother 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/11 "2007-12-15T14:01:00Z")
> **[Lump Of Coal | Ridgeway Brewing](https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/7944/20905/)** > > Lump Of Coal is a Foreign / Export Stout style beer brewed by Ridgeway Brewing in South Stoke, GB2, United Kingdom. Score: 79 with 669 ratings and reviews. Last update: 10-24-2023. [http://www.ratebeer.com/Beer/ridgeway-lump-of-coal/40415/](http://www.ratebeer.com/Beer/ridgeway-lump-of-coal/40415/) Seems to get mixed reviews. Some people say it’s a nice middle-of-the-road beer, a few can’t stand it. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/12 "2007-12-15T22:03:32Z")
Chocolate-flavored beer sounds a little icky to me, but it still beats [Rhino Shit](http://srhpost.blogspot.com/2007/12/rhino-foundation-says-give-rhino-shit.html) ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Lao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2bfe46/32.png) [@Dr.Lao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Lao)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/13 "2007-12-15T22:26:29Z")
[QUOTE=Lumpy] Chocolate-flavored beer sounds a little icky to me, but it still beats [Rhino Shit](http://srhpost.blogspot.com/2007/12/rhino-foundation-says-give-rhino-shit.html) [/QUOTE] Chocolate in beer makes a lot of sense if the beer is very dark. Darkly roasted malts often have chocolate and coffee notes. All three foods contain carbohydrates and proteins that have undergone a chemical transformation by heat and thus contain related compounds. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2007, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/14 "2007-12-15T23:05:03Z")
“Smell of chocolate” != “chocolate-flavored beer”. It just means that the aroma that came out with the blend of malts and hops, etc., has a subtle note of chocolate to it. Even that is overstating it. It’s not dark-molasses-flavored or toffee-flavored either. My bottle of 2004 Toasted Head California Shiraz says “rich raspberry and cherry flavors abound, with a hint of lavender and spice” on the back–that doesn’t mean that it’s raspberry-cherry-lavender-spice-flavored, it just means that subtle taste characteristics of the wine vaguely reminded tasters of those foods. ETA: To give you a beer example, scottblaze said this of one of my favorite beers on BeerAdvocate (Hazed & Infused by the Boulder Beer Co.): > [@srandycarter](#): > > [smell] - The grassy scent of newly mowed hay, malty caramel and sorghum syrup. This was from someone who rated it highly (he gave it a smell score of 4/5). Obviously, it didn’t smell or taste like hay, because nobody would want to drink that. ---
**Author:** ![susan\_foster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@susan\_foster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan_foster)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/15 "2007-12-16T00:50:36Z")
Of course, there’s always the option of [making your own coal](http://www.kingarthurflour.com/shop/recipe.jsp?recipe_id=1193245268233) Susan ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/16 "2007-12-16T01:05:47Z")
[QUOTE=Savannah] My mother found little packages of “lumps of coal” one Christmas, in a little red mesh bag. She put it in my little brother’s stocking. It was the only item he got… until he found the note that pointed to where the “real” stocking was. The expression on his face… Well, it was funny. Wouldn’t have been funny without the “real” stocking, though, which he found in very short order. (I don’t like mean practical jokes.) [/QUOTE] In southeast Georgia where I grew up as a kid, our equivalent of “lump of coal” was “box of switches”, as in “If you’re not good this year, Santa’s going to bring you a box of switches”. Switches (in case you’re wondering) were not clever little electronic gating devices, by the way, but rather limber but tough long-stemmed weeds such as “teaweed” that were cut, leaves removed, & used to whip wicked misbehaving kids with, a painful step up from spanking. When I was perhaps 11 and my little sister 9, I took the empty cardboard tube from a finished roll of wrapping paper, cut about two dozen switches from the empty lot behind our house, slipped them in the tube, flattened the ends, & wrapped them up in wrapping paper addressed _To HerName From Santa_ and put them under the tree with everything else. She weren’t amused much. ---
**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2007, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-getting-a-lump-of-coal-this-year/429985/17 "2007-12-16T07:14:07Z")
[QUOTE=AHunter3] ::: snippity do ::: When I was perhaps 11 and my little sister 9, I took the empty cardboard tube from a finished roll of wrapping paper, cut about two dozen switches from the empty lot behind our house, slipped them in the tube, flattened the ends, & wrapped them up in wrapping paper addressed _To HerName From Santa_ and put them under the tree with everything else. She weren’t amused much. [/QUOTE] I think that was a great idea… I like it…