# My husband is seriously ill **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 13, 2025, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019 "2025-09-13T18:02:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/21 "2025-09-13T21:11:18Z")
That’s all horrible. I’m very sorry you and him are going though all that crap. I hope he starts to improve and fast. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/22 "2025-09-13T21:17:19Z")
Wishing you both/all _all_ the best, exceptional care, and almost unimaginable luck. ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/23 "2025-09-13T21:50:07Z")
Really sorry to hear that. Best of luck in all that happens, and I wish you and your husband strength in handling this. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/24 "2025-09-13T21:57:00Z")
Welp, it’s 6pm, and they didn’t do the biopsy today. I’m guessing not until Monday. ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/25 "2025-09-13T21:58:23Z")
All I can offer is hugs and good thoughts. I hope for the best for the two of you. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/26 "2025-09-13T22:01:37Z")
Thanks to everyone, especially @whitetho , whom i may ask for advice, and to @nelliebly , @Aspenglow, and @LSLGuy , who have been through similar things and whom i am likely to also hit up. But i appreciate every post. I wish we could ❤ posts here. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/27 "2025-09-13T22:07:29Z")
This is scary! If it is multiple myeloma, that is one of the more survivable cancers. My Mom, and a high school friend, were both diagnosed with it in 2009. They are both still alive, and doing pretty well. My Mom’s 86, so there are caveats that one would expect with her age and medical history. However things turn out, we are holding you in our hearts. ---
**Author:** ![Ellecram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellecram/32/18948_2.png) [@Ellecram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellecram)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/28 "2025-09-13T22:09:02Z")
@puzzlegal I am sorry you have to go through this. I hope your husband receives the best medical care available and has a good outcome. Gird your loins with lots of patience, fortitude and persistence. ---
**Author:** ![ParallelLines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parallellines/32/3575_2.png) [@ParallelLines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParallelLines)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/29 "2025-09-13T22:32:57Z")
Please let me add all my well-wishes and hope for the best possible outcomes. I find it’s very easy when a loved one is at risk to forget to take care of my own health as well, so I’ll remind you to keep eating, exercising, doing puzzles, or anything else that’s part of your normal life to add that touch of normality. And I’ll echo @nelliebly that medical treatment options seem to be one of the few areas where we’ve gotten anywhere close to the scifi dreams of the near future! So take care of yourself well, that you can continue to strong ('cause I know you can and will!) for your husband. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats2)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/30 "2025-09-13T22:36:54Z")
I’m wishing you and your family strength and better days ahead. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/31 "2025-09-13T22:47:28Z")
> [@nelliebly](#): > > I don’t have any personal experience, but I’ll pass along something my cancer surgeon told me that was a big help: if you google the research on cancer, remember that research is proceeding so fast that even recently published studies (which typically began at least 5 years ago) are already outdated and tend to show worse outcomes. I found this to be true. This is true. The treatment regime I had for cancer this summer I’m told didn’t exist/wasn’t available even 3-4 years ago. (Currently I am in remission). I wish you and your husband well. Cancer is a serious and frightening diagnosis. Don’t forget to take care of yourself as well as him. ---
**Author:** ![LSLGuy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lslguy/32/5813_2.png) [@LSLGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LSLGuy)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/32 "2025-09-13T22:53:05Z")
> [@puzzlegal](#): > > Welp, it’s 6pm, and they didn’t do the biopsy today. I’m guessing not until Monday. You will find lots of these sorts of madcap dash, then suddenly wait 4 days, then madcap dash for 3 days, then wait 2 weeks. For me and the real-time nature of my job that was one of _the_ most distressing aspects to get used to. All I can offer is that it happens to everyone, it’s part of the process, and biology moves even more slowly than the medical industry does. So as awful as this extra wait seems, it’s almost certainly _not_ going to change anything in the medium term nor long run. Meantime try to save some unchewed fingernails for next week. You’ll probably need them. 🙂 Hugs and deep calming breaths. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/33 "2025-09-13T23:04:32Z")
> [@LSLGuy](#): > > . So as awful as this extra wait seems, it’s almost certainly _not_ going to change anything in the medium term nor long run. Thanks. I realize that. But also, I’m running out of fingernails to chew. And there are decisions i need to make (do i need to cancel my upcoming trip to Japan?) that will be easier to make when i know more. ---
**Author:** ![Ellecram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellecram/32/18948_2.png) [@Ellecram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellecram)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/34 "2025-09-13T23:40:09Z")
I’ve never had to deal with what you are going through but I’ve had some difficult times with sick family members I was somewhat responsible for. I used to feel guilty or non productive if I wasn’t worrying about all kinds of details during those times and had to learn to give myself permission to distract myself for short intervals. Back then my coping skill was escaping into a book. I also made lists just to feel organized. I found some comfort in my daily routines even though they had to be constantly and unpredictably rearranged. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/35 "2025-09-13T23:40:43Z")
When devastating medical news is suspected and/or diagnosed you’ll amaze yourself how fast you’ll get on board and with a plan in place. There will be kefuffles, no doubt. I believe you’re up to the task. Fight that _overwhelmed_ feeling. In me it stalls me out. I need to be moving forward to feel safe. Ask for help if you need it. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2025, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/36 "2025-09-13T23:49:11Z")
Not much to add, but it was a gut-wrench to open this thread and see who posted it. All my best wishes for the best outcome possible. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2025, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/37 "2025-09-14T00:47:21Z")
Really sorry to hear that. Best wishes to you and puzzleguy. ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2025, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/38 "2025-09-14T01:01:53Z")
I’m really sorry to hear this and hope it goes well. Wishing you both luck in succeeding doing the things you can, and at least being a bit philosophical about the things you can’t. And in not mourning things that nobody’s actually lost yet. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2025, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/39 "2025-09-14T01:14:00Z")
Hugs to you. And your hub. Living in increased uncertainty in these already uncertain times means leaning even more on your friends in real life and elsewhere. Holler when you want support. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2025, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019/40 "2025-09-14T01:41:21Z")
Very sorry to see this. Hoping for the best possible outcome. Also agreeing with others to take care of yourself. Hug a tree, or a cat, or a human, or all three— whatever works for you. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-is-seriously-ill/1023019.md?page=3)