# My Husband Said I am the Best Wife **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 8, 2012, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192 "2012-04-08T19:13:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mrs.Cake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/2acd7d/32.png) [@Mrs.Cake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mrs.Cake)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/1 "2012-04-08T19:13:56Z")
Just because I gave him a Nook Tablet, a bottle of good whiskey, and a blow job for his birthday. You guys are so easy to placate. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/2 "2012-04-08T19:28:23Z")
You did good. And so did he. On my husband’s 50th birthday, I gave him 50 one dollar bills for the stripper bar. “Just don’t come home with glitter on your face!” ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/3 "2012-04-08T19:40:04Z")
> [@Mrs.Cake](#): > > Just because I gave him a Nook Tablet, a bottle of good whiskey, and a blow job for his birthday. > > You guys are so easy to placate. I’d have been happy with a blow job on my birthday. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/4 "2012-04-08T19:41:07Z")
Yes, but wife #2 tries harder! ---
**Author:** ![Foggy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foggy/32/1082_2.png) [@Foggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Foggy)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/5 "2012-04-08T20:39:55Z")
> [@AuntiePam](#): > > You did good. And so did he. > > On my husband’s 50th birthday, I gave him 50 one dollar bills for the stripper bar. “Just don’t come home with glitter on your face!” Really? I would be more upset if he came home with glitter in a different place.😉 ---
**Author:** ![medstar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f07891/32.png) [@medstar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/medstar)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/6 "2012-04-08T20:45:42Z")
> [@Mrs.Cake](#): > > Just because I gave him a Nook Tablet, a bottle of good whiskey, and \*\*a blow job \*\*for his birthday. > > You guys are so easy to placate. I hope you brushed your teeth afterwards!😃 ::d&r:: ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/7 "2012-04-08T20:45:57Z")
> [@Khadaji](#): > > I’d have been happy with a blow job on my birthday. Me too. Or a Ferrari, if we’re trying to be realistic. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/8 "2012-04-08T22:35:29Z")
> [@Mrs.Cake](#): > > Just because I gave him a Nook Tablet, a bottle of good whiskey, and a blow job for his birthday. > > You guys are so easy to placate. As a guy I have to say you could have saved yourself the price of a nook and a good bottle of whiskey. But we appreciate the extra … Naw, a second blowjob will be great! ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/9 "2012-04-08T22:50:56Z")
> [@Khadaji](#): > > I’d have been happy with a blow job on my birthday. I’ll gladly take one on any of my 364 unbirthdays. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/10 "2012-04-08T23:44:27Z")
Are blowjobs between married straight couples a relatively rare/special occurrence for most people? As a gay man who sees blowjobs and handjobs as the typical go-to form of sex 60% of the time or more, I’m genuinely curious… ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2012, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/11 "2012-04-08T23:53:05Z")
I become disheartened when I hear that for a lot of men a blowjob is something that they get “for their birthday” or whatever. We might be getting our blowjobs from different kinds of people, **drewtwo** , but I share your sentiment. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/12 "2012-04-09T01:36:02Z")
Damn, you ARE the best wife. I don’t even get a goddamned blowjob on Steak and Blowjob Day. Christ, I didn’t even get the steak! ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/13 "2012-04-09T01:39:24Z")
Threads like this make me feel lonely. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/14 "2012-04-09T02:27:01Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > Are blowjobs between married straight couples a relatively rare/special occurrence for most people? > > As a gay man who sees blowjobs and handjobs as the typical go-to form of sex 60% of the time or more, I’m genuinely curious… Whatever the statistics, I imagine that very few guys want less sex with their long-term romantic partner. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/15 "2012-04-09T05:16:52Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > Are blowjobs between married straight couples a relatively rare/special occurrence for most people? Never been married, but a number of long-term relationships, and I routinely give my boyfriends blowjobs on MY birthday, because I don’t see any reason for that day to be different. (Hey, I LIKE giving blowjobs, I doubt that I’m alone in that.) I think (or at least hope) that the dearth of sex in marriage is highly exaggerated. I also routinely keep good whiskey in the house. I stock it the same as coffee or shampoo. It’s on the “things we need to live” list. That said; Mrs. Cake, well done. It’s a privilege and a pleasure to keep a good man (or a good woman) happy. ---
**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/16 "2012-04-09T07:03:13Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > Are blowjobs between married straight couples a relatively rare/special occurrence for most people? > As a gay man who sees blowjobs and handjobs as the typical go-to form of sex 60% of the time or more, I’m genuinely curious… > [@DianaG](#): > > Never been married, but a number of long-term relationships, and I routinely give my boyfriends blowjobs on MY birthday, because I don’t see any reason for that day to be different. (Hey, I LIKE giving blowjobs, I doubt that I’m alone in that.) I think (or at least hope) that the dearth of sex in marriage is highly exaggerated. Me too, I find it to be one of the aspects of intimacy that turns me on the most. I don’t need a special occasion to want to please my lover (and myself) in this way :D. Sure, celebratory days such as birthdays are extra special, but any ol’ day will do. **drewtwo99** - I’m not sure about other couples, but I have known of many women friends throughout my life that find blowjobs a “chore”… and out of the realms of what they feel they want to put out for their SO. Granted, most of the women I’m talking about are, or had been with their partners for quite a while and were losing interest in sex period. I understand why the spark goes out in some relationships, but I’m not sure why more folks don’t do anything about it when they see it happening. I, for one, need passion in my life. I need it like I need air. I get grumpy without it. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 9:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/17 "2012-04-09T09:45:21Z")
If it was his 30th birthday you should have given him 30 blow jobs. You unthinking monster! ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/18 "2012-04-09T10:13:53Z")
> [@Mrs.Cake](#): > > Just because I gave him a Nook Tablet, a bottle of good whiskey, and a blow job for his birthday. > > You guys are so easy to placate. You mean that not an everyday thing:eek::eek::mad:? I thought it was standard, came with the license.☹ You have put me off marriage. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/19 "2012-04-09T11:37:24Z")
Was it a color Nook? ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2012, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192/20 "2012-04-09T11:54:04Z")
Oh, my bad. Nevermind - I didn’t realize that one model os called the “Nook Tablet.” and of course that one has color. I really need to get out of this Luddite phase. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husband-said-i-am-the-best-wife/618192.md?page=2)