# My husband's ball scratching is driving me nuts. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 17, 2005, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571 "2005-10-17T07:07:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/41 "2005-10-17T16:54:49Z")
He doesn’t have a rash or anything. I don’t know how he can tell, 'cause I would think all that scratching would cause redness. The google ads I’m seeing are “Dad Search” 😕 “Shaving Private Ryan” and “Stress Balls” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/42 "2005-10-17T17:47:52Z")
Google Ad: **Weighted Balls!** ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/43 "2005-10-17T18:14:32Z")
> [@LeeshaJoy](#): > > Okay, I gotta know–what thread were you trying to post this in? **Cafe Society** thread, the one about “If money wasn’t an issue, what would you have for dinner?” The last post in that thread when I went to make mine was someone talking about a mushroom pizza. I had mentioned upthread that money wasn’t so much an issue as my gallbladder is, but I can’t get it out until February. My big, juicy mushrooms are slathered all over a thick steak, you see. I would link to it, but right now opening a second browser is going all wonky on me, and I don’t feel like doing it the slow way. I didn’t post my big juicy mushroom post over in that thread last night because frankly, I just felt jinxed. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![KlondikeGeoff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3e96dc/32.png) [@KlondikeGeoff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KlondikeGeoff)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/44 "2005-10-17T18:46:15Z")
> [@Anastasaeon](#): > > **Cafe Society** thread, the one about “If money wasn’t an issue, what would you have for dinner?” > ☹ Cheech, I sincerely hope you didn’t accidently cross post something on the above-mentioned thread about scratching balls! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Controvert](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@The\_Controvert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Controvert)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/45 "2005-10-17T19:53:40Z")
Sorry, just had to post about this Ad that strikes me as rather humorous: > [@](#): > > Sissel Power Weight Balls > These professional grade weights are shaped for maximum comfort. > [www.sissel-online.com](http://www.sissel-online.com) ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/46 "2005-10-17T21:51:13Z")
> [@Anastasaeon](#): > > Erg, seriously, people, all this talk is making me crave my great, big, juicy mushrooms. > > I can’t wait! There’s a fungus among us! ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/47 "2005-10-17T23:05:18Z")
Best.crosspost.evar! ---
**Author:** ![Elza\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Elza\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elza_B)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/48 "2005-10-17T23:28:11Z")
**Anastaseon** , you have the distinct honor of posting the first two posts that have made me cry in hilarity. I just completely lost it and spit Fruity Pebbles out of my nose. The first post was funny in itself, but the second one - I really thought you were dying to go home for your husband’s mushrooms. Unfortunately, _I_ am never going to look at mushrooms the same way. And I adore mushrooms. E. ---
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2005, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/49 "2005-10-17T23:49:19Z")
**Anastasaeon** , I actually cackled. I didn’t even know I could do that. Thanks! ---
**Author:** ![dalej42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@dalej42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dalej42)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/50 "2005-10-18T00:19:08Z")
I’m not a doctor! However, if it is really that painful, he should get checked. There’s lots of stuff that can be infecting him. I’ve had this misfortune of dealing with a minor case of scabies. That stuff is nasty and the itch is unbelivable. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/51 "2005-10-18T00:34:13Z")
Just tell him that you don’t want to catch whatever it is that he has, so no sex until the scratchintg stops. ---
**Author:** ![surrotobeinMD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@surrotobeinMD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/surrotobeinMD)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/52 "2005-10-18T00:40:02Z")
I’m afraid I’m much more intrigued by what exactly does Anastasaeon do as part of her daily AM routine? She says she comes face to face with Wood. Does that mean you have a bottle of Pledge and are polishing the furniture? Is my naivety showing? ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/53 "2005-10-18T04:07:34Z")
> [@surrotobeinMD](#): > > I’m afraid I’m much more intrigued by what exactly does Anastasaeon do as part of her daily AM routine? She says she comes face to face with Wood. Does that mean you have a bottle of Pledge and are polishing the furniture? Is my naivety showing? Am I being whooshed? She apparently is in intimate contact with her husband’s wood - that is, his erection. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/54 "2005-10-18T04:56:43Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Am I being whooshed? She apparently is in intimate contact with her husband’s wood - that is, his erection. _nod_ ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/55 "2005-10-18T05:37:03Z")
> [@Duke of Rat](#): > > There’s a fungus among us! Better than the fungi **Ms Belfry** apparently has at home. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/56 "2005-10-18T08:29:41Z")
> [@](#): > > **Excalibre** > \ wood \ > > **Anastasaeon** > > _nod_ Oh. My. God. (Part 2) Now I have these visions of a tree stump surrounded by delicious mushrooms. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 9:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/57 "2005-10-18T09:00:04Z")
Does he shave down below? Shaving increases or decreases the general itchiness of my testicular region depending on how long I go between shaves. ---
**Author:** ![roger\_thornhill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@roger\_thornhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roger_thornhill)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2005, 9:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/58 "2005-10-18T09:03:51Z")
> [@Habanero](#): > > I’m under the impression that most men would have their hands in their pants all the time if they could Can’t speak for all men but not my own pants in my case… And I loved how you squeezed balls _and_ nuts into the title. ---
**Author:** ![April.C](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/46a35a/32.png) [@April.C](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/April.C)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2012, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/59 "2012-03-24T16:50:53Z")
I scratch my husbands balls, when we watch tv, or laying in bed,i did it one day and he loves it he says my nails are the right length and I’m a lot softer. He really enjoys it. and honestly I don’t mind as long as he’s happy. ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2012, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571/60 "2012-03-24T17:10:19Z")
zombie or no keep those cooties moving. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-husbands-ball-scratching-is-driving-me-nuts/326571.md?page=4)