# My mother made me eat sperm **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 2, 2003, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165 "2003-06-02T17:51:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/21 "2003-06-02T19:21:07Z")
_Having sex_, _curing the headache_ or _kickin’ out_ (as in, are you kickin’ out tonight? [we’re so romantic]) is what we say in the Tech household. In fact, if Mr. Tech were to say ‘Let’s make love’, I think it might turn me off. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/22 "2003-06-02T19:28:32Z")
When Peanut says “make love to me” (and yes, he does use that term), I find the urge to bust out laughing to be overwhelming. Trust me when I say that I do all in my power _not_ to laugh. I’m pretty sure that would kill the moment. Even at a wee 33 years old, my old man is truly an “old man”! ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/23 "2003-06-02T19:44:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by LouisB \* > \*\*Well, I am “old-peopleish” so it remains “making love” for me. > > What do you guys call it? \*\* Fucking. Anything else is just a euphemism. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/24 "2003-06-02T19:46:48Z")
My SO and I have had to settle on “making sex” and “having love”. There’s just not an ounce of romantic bone in her body. Except at certain times… ya’ know? Then, yeah, not much romance going on there. I think. I’m so confused anymore. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/25 "2003-06-02T19:47:05Z")
No no gobear. I believe the technical term is “gettin’ stank on your hang low” ---
**Author:** ![UrbanChic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/9dc877/32.png) [@UrbanChic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UrbanChic)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/26 "2003-06-02T19:52:40Z")
ew, jar! lol Well, yeah, we call it fucking, too. I just assumed that was a given. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/27 "2003-06-02T19:52:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Amanita \* > \*\*I feel your pain. In my case, it was Donny Osmond. 😃 \*\* Your mother made you eat Donny Osmond? :eek: [aside] I’ve long wondered if he stay virtuous when every girl on the planet was throwing herself at him. I know I couldn’t and I was a positive PRIG when I was that age. [/aside] ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/28 "2003-06-02T19:54:34Z")
The Little Rascals will never be the same again. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/29 "2003-06-02T20:02:07Z")
The Pistachio Prescription. I read this book,too. Crazy, I haven’t thought about it in a billion years, and blammo it all came back to me. um,please resume your conversations now… ---
**Author:** ![Arden\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@Arden\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arden_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/30 "2003-06-02T20:02:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SkipMagic \* > \*\*So… you think Air Supply’s biggest hit should have been “ **Making _Fuck_ Out of Nothing at All** ”? > > 😉 \*\* It would have gotten a lot more airplay at the station I was working at! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/31 "2003-06-02T20:03:01Z")
\ I fucking love Jimmy John’s. \ Carry on with the sex talk ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/32 "2003-06-02T20:13:15Z")
> [@](#): > > The “engorged with blood” part always confused and upset me. I always though they sprayed blood all over the place when they climaxed. Um. They don’t? Uh oh… ---
**Author:** ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/33 "2003-06-02T20:17:09Z")
This reminds me of when I used to babysit as a teenager…a 4-year-old girl was sitting in front of the TV, and she’d brought her pillow with her to lie on, and after awhile I looked over and noticed she was humping it. Not just idly “riding it,” either…her hands were underneath it, in the _ahem_ correct position for adult female…stimulation. The kid was masturbating in front of God and everyone. I really didn’t know what to do; I didn’t know if I should tell her to stop, or to let her continue…or to mention it to her parents as something she should perhaps learn to do privately… So I just distracted her and put her to bed. I didn’t mention it to her parents b/c that would have been far too embarrassing. Looking back I still don’t know what I’d have done if she were my daughter…but I doubt it would have been poor **Jarbabyj’s** sperm experience. 😃 Thankfully, my parents were sufficiently repressed that I learned all about sex through the usual playground channels, and avoided that awkward birds and bees chat altogether. ---
**Author:** ![Olentzero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/90ced4/32.png) [@Olentzero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Olentzero)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/34 "2003-06-02T20:17:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SkipMagic \* > **Making _Fuck_ Out of Nothing at All** Did he just say “making fuck”? ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/35 "2003-06-02T20:38:40Z")
We can always count on you for interesting thread titles and posts, jarbaby. And, in a rare lapse of good taste, that’s all I’m a gonna say. ---
**Author:** ![LolaCocaCola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/36 "2003-06-02T20:41:47Z")
I wonder if **Indygrrl’s** mother made her eat alfalfa sprouts. Awww, ya know I kid! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/37 "2003-06-02T21:05:05Z")
I was always inexorably drawn to alfalfa sprouts as a child…could never explain it. They were just so much fun. Well, now I know why:D ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/38 "2003-06-02T21:15:12Z")
Alfalfa sprouts anagrams: Alas! Pal or stuff? All off up rat ass. Foul as pal farts. A trap full of ass. ---
**Author:** ![Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Helen\_s\_Eidolon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_s_Eidolon)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/39 "2003-06-02T21:45:26Z")
And I thought I’d be the first to bring up the The Pistachio Prescription hijack. I remember that book too. And a whole buncha others she wrote. I will now always relate it to sperm. I hate you, **jar**. ---
**Author:** ![NoGoodNamesLeft](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/8797f3/32.png) [@NoGoodNamesLeft](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NoGoodNamesLeft)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2003, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165/40 "2003-06-02T22:11:39Z")
> [@](#): > > Did he just say “making fuck”? We think alike, Olentzero. I’ll have ‘Berzerker’ in my head all day now… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-mother-made-me-eat-sperm/179165.md?page=3)