# "My Naked Truth" or what I call "Bullshit" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 15, 2014, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228 "2014-07-15T21:59:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/141 "2014-07-16T20:24:24Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > This seems really unlikely to have actually happened as described based on my experience of women. They really aren’t much on having their SO throw their loser friends a pity fuck. “Aww, babe, at least let her tongue your balls or give you a handie. She’s been a little depressed lately and that should cheer her right up.” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/142 "2014-07-16T20:29:04Z")
> [@](#): > > “There is some imbalance in perception and understanding here. Sure objectification is one of the sore legacies of patriarchy and a masculine-dominant social narrative. But it can be a slippery slope if the so-called ‘objectifier’ is also objectified in a hasty gesture of reactivity. The feminine must also be able to hold space for authentic reflection from both sides, instead of quickly jumping into a victim mode. Physical and emotional realities of arousal, intimacy and empathy cannot be unilaterally forced or demanded, and they need to be allowed their own unfolding in a non-threatening, non-judgmental environment. Ultimately, the choice of being ‘hurt’ is a personal choice, the responsibility of which cannot be ‘outsourced’ to the other. I would love to hear the voice of Dave too, so that this delicate subject achieves greater wholeness of perspective and depth of nuance.” That’s hot. Wanna go away for the weekend? Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/143 "2014-07-16T20:30:59Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > This seems really unlikely to have actually happened as described based on my experience of women. They really aren’t much on having their SO throw their loser friends a pity fuck. Then you need to meet more women. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/144 "2014-07-16T20:38:19Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > That would be a little difficult since I started stating my opinion on the matter in post #4 in this thread. No, the reason to show that was to simply illustrate the vast number of people (which has gone up, I see) who think that story isn’t on the up-and-up and hope that those who are still being, erm, cautious (Is that kind enough? Everything else sounded too derogatory.) should consider the old saw about “If almost everyone thinks you’re wrong, it may be time to reconsider.” Right, I didn’t mean you were basing your view on the majority, I was saying you are, just in that last post, saying you feel more certain based on the fact that you are in the majority. That’s fine, I was just making sure I understood correctly. > [@](#): > > And about insults… 1.) They have more sting if they are original. Or at least, not immediately parroted back to the originator. Just saying. And 2.) you have to care about the other person’s opinion for it to hurt. Agreed on all counts. I was asking because I thought you were indicating you felt insulted, which I thought was strange since I was (as you just pointed out) literally just parroting back what you said. You have certain impressions about how people generally are, and this made you think I don’t know a lot of people because my impressions differ. Similarly, I have impressions about how people are, and this made me think you don’t know a lot of people because your impressions differ. Just as what you said need not be taken as insulting, so also, what I said need not be taken as insulting. We have different ideas about what is normal, that is all. Of course I know I shouldn’t _actually_ think I know anything about how many people you know based on whether I think you have the right ideas about what’s normal, and that’s why I used the language of “tempted to wonder” instead of simply actually "wonder"ing. I assume you think the same thing–though I note you didn’t hedge at all and just outright wondered. > [@](#): > > So, there’s your answer. Didn’t bother me in the slightest and my lunch was good, albeit too short. > Now, hon, I’m truly done replying to your inane comments. O… kay… 😕 > [@](#): > > I’m still laughing over me being a “slut shamer.” You explained how I misunderstood you. I don’t understand what there is to laugh about. I thought you were saying one thing (a thing which would certainly put you at the border of slut shaming,) but you were saying something else it turns out. I was wrong. > [@](#): > > Perhaps I should get a custom title? So, have a nice day. I’m done tripping over your “But I’m a nice guy who wouldn’t doooooo that!” baggage. Is it possible you have me confused with somebody? I have no idea what you’re talking about. “I’m a nice guy” talk is anathema to me. I generally take it to be a prima facie sign of something being wrong with the guy who claims to be a “nice guy.” I’d certainly never use the language myself, for that reason. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/145 "2014-07-16T20:38:57Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > That’s hot. Wanna go away for the weekend? > > Regards, > > Shodan Well, those hippie chicks who y’all too much are usually the most fun in the sack. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/146 "2014-07-16T20:39:41Z")
Really Frylock? How often has this happened to you? I’m 52, been married three times, and had dozens of girlfriends. It never happened to me once. None of my friends have ever related it happening to them, even some notably promiscuous and chatty friends. Hell, I will kick it up a notch and state that, based on my experience of people, nobody is really big on their SO throwing their loser friends a pity fuck. Letters to Penthouse muck. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/147 "2014-07-16T20:43:29Z")
Look, **Frylock** , you seem to be very genuine in your posting now, and that’s admirable. We’ve apparently gotten on a bad foot over this for no reason, and since I’m basically a softie at heart, let’s just call it good. I’m sorry for razzing you. We’ll intimately just have to agree to disagree. And I’ll have to avoid buying that woman’s book. Peace? ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/148 "2014-07-16T21:13:44Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > Really Frylock? How often has this happened to you? > I’m 52, been married three times, and had dozens of girlfriends. It never happened to me once. None of my friends have ever related it happening to them, even some notably promiscuous and chatty friends. > Hell, I will kick it up a notch and state that, based on my experience of people, nobody is really big on their SO throwing their loser friends a pity fuck. > Letters to Penthouse muck. Do you know any poly people? ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/149 "2014-07-16T21:17:12Z")
> [@faithfool](#): > > Look, **Frylock** , you seem to be very genuine in your posting now, and that’s admirable. We’ve apparently gotten on a bad foot over this for no reason, and since I’m basically a softie at heart, let’s just call it good. I’m sorry for razzing you. We’ll intimately just have to agree to disagree. And I’ll have to avoid buying that woman’s book. Peace? I’m fer it. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/150 "2014-07-16T21:21:17Z")
Yes, I do. Even dabbled in it a bit. I never knew pity fucks to be a part of it. If there was one hard and fast rule, it was “no drama.” Pity fucks are something that would have to be directed towards people who would almost certainly violate that rule…like the friend in zoid’s little story. No, I ain’t buying it. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/151 "2014-07-16T21:21:39Z")
BTW I wouldn’t buy the book either. She sounds insufferable. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/152 "2014-07-16T21:23:00Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > BTW I wouldn’t buy the book either. She sounds insufferable. 🙂 QFT. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/153 "2014-07-16T21:25:05Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > BTW I wouldn’t buy the book either. She sounds insufferable. 🙂 She does, doesn’t she? I don’t know whether it’s the Bulwer-Lytton style writing, or the stealth bragging, but I wouldn’t want to spend a weekend with her. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/154 "2014-07-16T21:29:41Z")
There are people some of whom identify as poly who would treat sex this casually. I knew two such people in high school. I don’t mean to say this is inherent to the poly lifestyle, I was just casting about for an example of a crowd where something like this is not unheard of. I mean I have two friends who are married and who also go to parties where each has seed with someone else, no strings attached. Knowing that this occurs, I don’t know why you would think the pity seed scenario is so hard to believe. ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/155 "2014-07-16T21:29:44Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > She does, doesn’t she? I don’t know whether it’s the Bulwer-Lytton style writing, or the stealth bragging, but I wouldn’t want to spend a weekend with her. Not even if you were promised naked cuddling? **Frylock** , I totally get the polyamory angle, but I still would find it very hard to sleep with someone to whom I’m not attracted. When I think “pity fuck,” that type of person pops into my head. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/156 "2014-07-16T21:30:45Z")
Seed should be sex. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/157 "2014-07-16T21:34:25Z")
> [@Frylock](#): > > There are people some of whom identify as poly who would treat sex this casually. I knew two such people in high school. I don’t mean to say this is inherent to the poly lifestyle, I was just casting about for an example of a crowd where something like this is not unheard of. > > I mean I have two friends who are married and who also go to parties where each has seed with someone else, no strings attached. Knowing that this occurs, I don’t know why you would think the pity seed scenario is so hard to believe. Basically, the “no drama” thing. As I have experienced the poly thing, fucking your SO’s friend, with hir knowledge of what is going on, probably isn’t going to be a big deal. The friend “falling in love” with the SO or becoming obsessed with hir, neither unlikely with the kind of sad loser who needs pity fucks, isn potentially a very big deal indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/158 "2014-07-16T21:36:12Z")
No drama is a good principle. How many people actually follow it? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/159 "2014-07-16T21:39:35Z")
Most people treat it like The Pirate’s Code. ---
**Author:** ![Frylock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ce7236/32.png) [@Frylock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frylock)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2014, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228/160 "2014-07-16T21:41:32Z")
Well anyway like I said I wasn’t really saying they must be poly. The larger point is that there are people known to treat seed extremely casually. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-naked-truth-or-what-i-call-bullshit/693228.md?page=9)