# My new Cult TV Network **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 20, 2002, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686 "2002-08-20T01:39:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/1 "2002-08-20T01:39:50Z")
Alphagene Enterprises, with generous endowments from the Gizmonics Institute and the Mom Corporation, would like to propose the creation of a hypothetical new cable network with high-quality defunct series that were too hip for the masses, but deeply appeciated by smaller clusters of hipsters and wackos. Our network’s unholy legion of retained lawyers, negotiatiors and planetjackers will be able to break contracts and nullify any legal restraints from keeping these reruns from being shown on another channel. What’s in the lineup so far? Turn your crank to TV’s **Mystery Science Theater 3000**! It will be shown at a time when people without severe sleep disorders can enjoy bad sci-fi and obsolete educational shorts. And it won’t be cut up into hour long segments. It’s huge! **Invader Zim** will once again proudly march in its radioactive rubber pants thanks to our vision. The thought of this show having to share airtime with any Rugrat clone causes us to make little sicky noises. Obey the fist! We will once again consider who actually does prostitute laundry with the triumphant return of late night’s favorite apparel **Sifl and Olly**. Chester has agreed to appear again on the show, now that his contract includes 400 free passes to the zoo. Good news, everyone! Bender’s shiny metal ass will always have a home. While the **Futurama** isn’t quite dead yet, you’d have to be under the spell of a brain slug or hypnotoad to think Fox would be above it. On a more dramatic note, we can all resume shooting mental daggers at Kellerman and Barnfather when **Homicide: Life on the Streets** is brought back to the airwaves. Enjoy the heavy acting work taken on by Andre Brauer and continue to have dirty thoughts about Michelle Forbes and the autopsy tables. We are currently accepting suggestions for other good shows that have been cancelled or dangerously close to being so. Perhaps ideas for a weekly movie. We are also accepting submissions for what to name our network. And keep in mind that while many serious sci-fi epics have a degree of cult status, we’re not loading up on Bablyon 5 type crap. Our target audience gets laid. This ain’t the Sci-Fi network. And you’ll thank us for that. Anyone care to help out with this noble cause? ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/2 "2002-08-20T03:29:17Z")
MST3K FOREVER! Suggestions: 2 words: Police Squad. 2 more words: Cop Rock. A Matt Helm movie marathon. Quark. As for a name for the network… Rogue TV ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/3 "2002-08-20T04:28:59Z")
Red Dwarf! Greg the Bunny! Kids in the Hall! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Tim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@The\_Tim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Tim)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/4 "2002-08-20T04:46:26Z")
The Family Guy. The Critic. ZoneRiders if only for me to point and say “See this is a realy show I’m not insane.” to all those who think I’m a lunatic ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Harvey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac8455/32.png) [@Max\_Harvey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Harvey)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/5 "2002-08-20T04:59:21Z")
Sledge Hammer! The Tick (both of 'em) Clerks: TAS The Ben Stiller Show ---
**Author:** ![Skip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@Skip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skip)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/6 "2002-08-20T10:17:15Z")
I second **Homicide** , how Andre Braugher went for so long without an Emmy (and he only got it when his character became mentally challenged after a stroke) is a crime! And of course really no Cult TV channel is complete without… **The Prisoner** ---
**Author:** ![Crusoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/49beb7/32.png) [@Crusoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crusoe)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/7 "2002-08-20T10:19:46Z")
**The Avengers**. ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/8 "2002-08-20T10:58:57Z")
**The Straight Dope TV series** How could _we_ let this one get away? **Due South Cupid The Job Beakman’s World Citizen Baines** (Hey, I’m a cult following all my own!) **Buffalo Bill** There are lots of kids shows I think would be popular here, but I’ll leave that puff and stuff to the land of the lost. So someone else can recommend it. ---
**Author:** ![Skip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@Skip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skip)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/9 "2002-08-20T12:52:18Z")
And I forgot : **The Adventures of Briscoe County Jr** ---
**Author:** ![Skip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@Skip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skip)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 12:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/10 "2002-08-20T12:54:35Z")
And one last show from me (promise): **EZ Streets** - One of the best cop shows around, with a stellar cast (Joe Pantoliano, Jason Gedricks, Ken Olin) which lasted one season on CBS. ---
**Author:** ![audit1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@audit1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audit1)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/11 "2002-08-20T14:09:41Z")
REBOOT ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/12 "2002-08-20T14:17:23Z")
Twin Peaks The Adventures of Briscoe County Jr Los Luchadores! (Mexican wrestler superheroes LIVE ACTION show) Land of the Lost Star Trek: The Animated Series Shazam! The Mighty Isis Electro Woman and Dyna Girl Really, most/all of the live action Saturday morning shows from the 70s. ---
**Author:** ![milquetoast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/258eb7/32.png) [@milquetoast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/milquetoast)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/13 "2002-08-20T14:28:33Z")
How about those fillers that Nick at Nite use to run on **How to be Swell** (starring _Bewitched_’s Dick York in all his teenage awkwardness). And MTV’s **Liquid Television** ---
**Author:** ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/14 "2002-08-20T15:13:54Z")
**The Adventures of Pete and Pete Pee Wee’s Playhouse** Back to back, for your Surreal Kid’s Hour! ---
**Author:** ![El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Elvis_Rojo)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/15 "2002-08-20T15:19:34Z")
**G vs E** **Heat Vision and Jack**. I’m not sure how many episodes were actually made, but they could always make more. **War of the Worlds**. I never actually watched this, but if we’re going with now defunct sci-fi… And **Evil Dead Marathons** ever night of a full moon. ---
**Author:** ![Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/16 "2002-08-20T18:30:52Z")
Oh, and for the ladies, The Days and Nights of Molly Dodd. ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/17 "2002-08-20T19:56:50Z")
**The Tick (animated)** **old Voltron (both version please)** \*\*Star Trek: DS9 \*\* Oh yeah 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![MrVisible](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@MrVisible](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrVisible)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/18 "2002-08-20T20:08:07Z")
And in the “Shows cut off just when they were getting irresistibly good, and deserve another season, especially since none of the actors are doing anything in particular anyway” category… Peter Benchley’s **Amazon** ---
**Author:** ![Morgainelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Morgainelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgainelf)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/19 "2002-08-20T20:45:58Z")
**The Comic Strip** and **The Young Ones** , uncensored. And how about **Best of the West**? And for early morning kid shows, let’s bring back **Romper Room**. There will be lots of opportunity for product tie ins, what with romper stompers, big balls on elastic bands, and punching bag clowns. ---
**Author:** ![Zap\_Rowsdower](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3da27b/32.png) [@Zap\_Rowsdower](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zap_Rowsdower)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-new-cult-tv-network/124686/20 "2002-08-21T01:23:53Z")
**Get a Life**