# "My Parents Open Carry" the kid's book that explains why packing heat everywhere is good thing **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 13, 2014, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406 "2014-09-13T18:47:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Dave\_Hartwick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@Dave\_Hartwick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dave_Hartwick)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/41 "2014-09-15T08:27:22Z")
Charlotte’s Webley The Little Engine that Could Resist Tyranny Where the Wild Things Are Packing Tom Swift and his Wonderful Machine that Prevents Home Invasions Make Way for Second Amendment Solutions! Heather has One Parent Due to an Accidental Discharge Are You There God? It’s Me, George Zimmerman my brother Sam is dead and I need therapy forever Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Horrific Events After a Spat About Whose Turn it was to Feed the Dog ---
**Author:** ![Oglomott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/oglomott/32/3543_2.png) [@Oglomott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oglomott)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/42 "2014-09-15T10:11:23Z")
“The Wizard of Uzi” “To Cap a Mockingbird” ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/43 "2014-09-15T14:01:22Z")
_Where the Sidearm Ends_ _Horton Hears an HK_ ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/44 "2014-09-15T15:09:33Z")
Now I’m curious about the contents of the book. Does the family encounter multiple threats on their Saturday afternnon running errands? “Suzie! Push that shopping cart out of the way and get in the car! I’ll hold them off while Ma makes a run for the passenger door! Run Helen!! Run!” Bob, Helen, and Suzie finish their lunch and are in front of the Springfiled public library when approached by a group of large black men carrying chains and pipes. “Give us all your cash and jewelry fool! And we’ll be taking your daughter with us! Mwa-ha-ha!” Bob slowly pulls back the front of his Cabela’s windbreaker revealing his Glock 9. The leader of the group panics “Oh! Nevermind sir, we don’t want any trouble. Me and the boys here were just returning our Harry Potter books. Ain’t that right boys?” The leader turns to see all his friends have disappeared, All that remains is a few pipes and chains lying in the grass. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/45 "2014-09-15T16:28:25Z")
A Series of Unfortunate Shootings It’s the Great Pumpgun, Charlie Brown! The Adventures of Captain Under the Shoulder Holster Harry Potter and the Goodness of Gunfire ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/46 "2014-09-15T17:58:18Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > And it’s a great companion volume to [“Melanie’s Marvellous Measles”](http://www.amazon.com/Melanies-Marvelous-Measles-Stephanie-Messenger/dp/1466938897), which celebrates the joys of rashes and high fevers which you can share with other kiddies. Make it a three-fer and add in Dr. Michael Salzhauer’s book to explain plastic surgery to the kiddies [My Beautiful Mommy](http://www.amazon.com/Beautiful-Mommy-Michael-Alexander-Salzhauer/dp/1601310323). (The perfect gift for the little girl with everything but body image issues.) ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/47 "2014-09-15T20:02:09Z")
Tales of a Fourth-Grade Sniper Take Aim at Ducklings Don’t Let the Pigeon Give You Crap Curious George Looks in the Glove Compartment ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2014, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/48 "2014-09-15T20:52:09Z")
The 500 Gats of Bartholomew Cubbins And To Think That I Shot Him On Mulberry Street ---
**Author:** ![Jamicat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c67d28/32.png) [@Jamicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamicat)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 5:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/49 "2014-09-16T05:50:16Z")
Fun with Dick and Janes. -.- ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/50 "2014-09-16T10:39:28Z")
Where The Wild Things Were Fox With Glocks ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/51 "2014-09-16T12:00:25Z")
_Heather’s Mommies Have Two Handguns_ ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 12:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/52 "2014-09-16T12:51:33Z")
The Camouflaging Tree ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/53 "2014-09-16T17:14:37Z")
Mr. Toad’s Wild Survivalist’s Compound ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/54 "2014-09-16T19:03:33Z")
_My Little Colt_ ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/55 "2014-09-16T19:15:26Z")
My Friend Fokker-Leimberger Oh, the Places You’ll Go Shooting! The 13 Glocks ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/56 "2014-09-16T21:09:02Z")
> [@Hampshire](#): > > Now I’m curious about the contents of the book. The Amazon page allows you to search for a word or phrase in the book. I suppose with enough patience you could piece together most of it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2014, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/57 "2014-09-16T21:18:13Z")
Just did some searching online for this; this book has attracted a truly enormous amount of vitriol ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2014, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/58 "2014-09-17T01:30:17Z")
The Cat With The Gat in the Hat ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2014, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/59 "2014-09-17T12:23:11Z")
Moo, Baa, Blam Blam Blam! ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2014, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406/60 "2014-09-17T12:43:03Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > The 13 Glocks Awesome. 🆒 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-parents-open-carry-the-kids-book-that-explains-why-packing-heat-everywhere-is-good-thing/698406.md?page=2)