# My plans for world domination are nearly complete! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 30, 2007, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692 "2007-07-30T15:37:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Mouse\_Maven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Mouse\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mouse_Maven)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/1 "2007-07-30T15:37:21Z")
The [second step](http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/science/article2159295.ece) has been completed! Everyone bow down before me and my murine minions! **Wha-ha-ha-ha!!** ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/2 "2007-07-30T15:48:31Z")
So you’re going to take over the world with schizophrenic mice? How’s that going to work? ---
**Author:** ![Mouse\_Maven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Mouse\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mouse_Maven)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/3 "2007-07-30T15:51:18Z")
[QUOTE=hotflungwok] So you’re going to take over the world with schizophrenic mice? How’s that going to work? [/QUOTE] I am not foolish enough to reveal my plans to you, plebeian. (Unless you’re Sean Connery. Then I’ll tell you _everything_. 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/4 "2007-07-30T15:54:59Z")
Narf! ---
**Author:** ![Fugazi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f08c70/32.png) [@Fugazi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fugazi)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/5 "2007-07-30T15:58:16Z")
[QUOTE=hotflungwok] So you’re going to take over the world with schizophrenic mice? How’s that going to work? [/QUOTE] Don’t you know? Mice are super-powerful transdimensional beings and only the mouse part sticks into our dimension. I’m not sure how smart it is to make schizophrenic super-powerful transdimensional beings, but in the interest of world domination, I guess ya gotta do, what ya gotta do. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/6 "2007-07-30T16:08:47Z")
[QUOTE=Fugazi] Don’t you know? Mice are super-powerful transdimensional beings and only the mouse part sticks into our dimension. I’m not sure how smart it is to make schizophrenic super-powerful transdimensional beings, but in the interest of world domination, I guess ya gotta do, what ya gotta do. [/QUOTE] And it’ll help you with those bookings on the 5-dimensional chat-show circuit. ---
**Author:** ![hotflungwok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/edb3f5/32.png) [@hotflungwok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hotflungwok)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/7 "2007-07-30T16:58:00Z")
[QUOTE=Mouse\_Maven] I am not foolish enough to reveal my plans to you, plebeian. (Unless you’re Sean Connery. Then I’ll tell you _everything_. 😉 ) [/QUOTE] Prove that I’m not Sean Connery. ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/8 "2007-07-30T17:06:59Z")
So how do you tell if mice are schizophrenic? Do they take to wandering around their cages pushing tiny shopping carts full of junk and squeaking wildly to themselves? ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/9 "2007-07-30T17:39:00Z")
…One is a genius; the other’s insane. To prove their mousey worth, They’ll overthrow the earth… ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/10 "2007-07-30T18:16:13Z")
[QUOTE=cher3] So how do you tell if mice are schizophrenic? Do they take to wandering around their cages pushing tiny shopping carts full of junk and squeaking wildly to themselves? [/QUOTE] Yeah, that’s my question. It looks like they’re claiming a difference in brain structure, mostly. That and mentioning depression and hyperactivity. How can you tell that a mouse is depressed? And even if they’re depressed and hyperactive, how is that schizophrenia? ---
**Author:** ![pizzabrat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e9c0ed/32.png) [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/11 "2007-07-30T18:31:38Z")
[QUOTE=fishbicycle] Narf! [/QUOTE] That’s great. Seriously, the fact that there’d already been a spot on pop-cultural iteration of this very story, it’s too perfect. ---
**Author:** ![Hockey\_Monkey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a183cd/32.png) [@Hockey\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hockey_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2007, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/12 "2007-07-30T22:45:31Z")
[QUOTE=Mouse\_Maven] The [second step](http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/science/article2159295.ece) has been completed! Everyone bow down before me and my murine minions! **Wha-ha-ha-ha!!** [/QUOTE] So who died and made you The Brain? Narf! ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/13 "2007-07-31T01:47:45Z")
Oooh! Oooh! **Mouse\_Maven** , can I be your second-in-command? Also, narf. ---
**Author:** ![Mouse\_Maven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@Mouse\_Maven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mouse_Maven)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/14 "2007-07-31T02:32:59Z")
[QUOTE=Kythereia] Oooh! Oooh! **Mouse\_Maven** , can I be your second-in-command? Also, narf. [/QUOTE] How good are you at groveling and sucking up? Do you acknowledge my superior intellect? Are you immune to the charms for comely British secret agents? :dubious: [QUOTE=Yllaria] Yeah, that’s my question. It looks like they’re claiming a difference in brain structure, mostly. That and mentioning depression and hyperactivity. How can you tell that a mouse is depressed? And even if they’re depressed and hyperactive, how is that schizophrenia? [/QUOTE] In all seriousness: Replicating mental illnesses in mice is the holy grail of many researchers. (I’ve been aware of this schizophrenic mouse project for over a year.) These mice have a mutation analogous to one found in a family with a strong tendency for this illness. As for diagnosing schizophrenia in mice, my best guess is that brain scans and/or a physical examination of the brain are used. One complication with studying mental illness in mice is that some strains have endemic behavioral problems. One strain, know as Black 6 (whole designation: C57BL/6J), is notorius for self injury. I am such a rodent nerd. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/15 "2007-07-31T02:58:00Z")
[QUOTE=Kythereia] Oooh! Oooh! **Mouse\_Maven** , can I be your second-in-command? [/QUOTE] You want I should turn the Death Ray on him/her, Boss? This is a training program for the Dalek mice, or a cover story? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/16 "2007-07-31T12:52:19Z")
> [@](#): > > My plans for world domination are nearly complete! That’s exactly what my cat wants you to believe. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/17 "2007-07-31T13:20:24Z")
Poit! ---
**Author:** ![Snickers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Snickers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snickers)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/18 "2007-07-31T16:57:12Z")
Are you pondering what I’m pondering? ---
**Author:** ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/19 "2007-07-31T17:05:59Z")
[QUOTE=Snickers] Are you pondering what I’m pondering? [/QUOTE] Yes Brain, but where are we going to buy 50,000 pounds of Vasoline and the world’s largest electic razor? ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2007, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692/20 "2007-07-31T17:25:03Z")
[QUOTE=Snickers] Are you pondering what I’m pondering? [/QUOTE] ISTB, but what if the _Reader_’s new owners don’t want to sell the hampsters? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-plans-for-world-domination-are-nearly-complete/413692.md?page=2)