# My sex life is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 31, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702 "2004-07-31T06:01:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/1 "2004-07-31T06:01:44Z")
Earlier this month I went on a cruise, and during the cruise I had a fling with an older woman (no, I am not making this up, yes, the whole story sounds too much like a Penthouse letter, moving on…). I had posted about this a few weeks ago, because I had kind of a hard time getting over the fact that it was just a fling (I’m better now, thanks! 🙂 ) When I got back from the cruise, I just had to tell my friend about it. Not to brag about it, but just to share the experience. Both my best friend and I have had ladyfriends few and far between, so it is fun sharing what happened with each other. When I talked about it to my friend over the phone, his roomate was eavesdropping on the conversation at his apartment. This girl can really get under my skin. We used to be friends, but lately I’ve been simply unable to tolerate how dysfunctional and neurotic she can be, and frustrated by how much she manipulates my best friend. She loves to think of me as some perpetual loser, and treats me as such when she brings her friends over so she can stroke her own ego. When she found out I had slept wtih another woman, it apparently blew her mind that I was able to _accomplish_ something that, in her mind, was “Impossible!” :eek: But it was true, and apparently nosy roomate was so repulsed by the notion she just _had_ to tell everyone she knew, and apparently they were _so_ sympathetic about how _traumatized_ she was from hearing this information. :rolleyes: So now I am constantly being asked rude comments, like “I bet she was ugly” and “I hope she gave you herpes” I feel like she’s taking a pleasant experience and maligned it into something horrible and wrong. ---
**Author:** ![cmason32](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@cmason32](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmason32)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/2 "2004-07-31T06:17:17Z")
violence solves everything ---
**Author:** ![furt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/439d5e/32.png) [@furt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furt)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/3 "2004-07-31T06:27:48Z")
“Ironically Titled” for $500, Alex. ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/4 "2004-07-31T08:20:45Z")
Fight fire with fire. If people are being nasty to you because roommate-from-hell eavesdropped and gossipped about you, give it right back to them for being shitstirrers who listen to gossip derived by sneaky, backbiting, nasty, bitchy behavior. ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/5 "2004-07-31T08:25:24Z")
You’ve ALREADY had the best revenge possible. You have simultaneously enjoyed and improved your life ignoring her, which has made her livid. I understand her thoughts a bit, and she deserves he swift wake-up call for pigeonholing you in the first place. Bitch. I suggest leaving well alone. But if you any photos of your friend looking hot, any amusing anecdotes, etc, you could tell your friend on the understanding it’d get back to her. > [@furt](#): > > “Ironically Titled” for $500, Alex. _snork_ I want to be you and say things like that. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/6 "2004-07-31T10:16:34Z")
Sooo… … how are your ugly herpes? ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/7 "2004-07-31T13:55:27Z")
You need to get even Steven. Do what we did. If you ever find out about an angry voice mail she’s left for someone, record it, and throw a hip-hop beat over it that would make Snoop Dogg proud. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![laigle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ce7236/32.png) [@laigle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/laigle)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/8 "2004-07-31T14:52:08Z")
Just spread a rumor that she’s pissed at you because you dumped her for being an immobile lump in the sack. Or you and her mom tried to talk her into a menage. Remember, there’s nothing wrong with being an evil bastard. ---
**Author:** ![RingOfFire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e47774/32.png) [@RingOfFire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RingOfFire)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/9 "2004-07-31T16:11:19Z")
Can’t side with you here…Loose lips sink ships. Never speak in unsecure locations what you wouldn’t want everyone to hear. Though most of us learned that in the 3rd grade. :wally ---
**Author:** ![hajario](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hajario/32/171_2.png) [@hajario](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hajario)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/10 "2004-07-31T16:31:11Z")
I think the roommate wants you and is jealous…or maybe envious. Haj ---
**Author:** ![ParentalAdvisory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/53a042/32.png) [@ParentalAdvisory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ParentalAdvisory)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/11 "2004-07-31T17:53:23Z")
> [@RingOfFire](#): > > Can’t side with you here…Loose lips sink ships. Never speak in unsecure locations what you wouldn’t want everyone to hear. Though most of us learned that in the 3rd grade. :wally I disagree. It was a private conversation that she never should’ve listened in on. Something you’d learn in the 3rd grade as well. She deserves equal treatment in the worst way. ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/12 "2004-07-31T18:05:02Z")
People don’t exert the amount of energy it takes to spread a bunch of rumors or gossip about someone unless they care about, in either a positive or negative way, the victim of the gossip. The worst thing you could do to someone who is obviously starving for attention from you, either positive or negative? Don’t give her any. It’s certain to drive her batshit. ---
**Author:** ![Daisy\_Mae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/46a35a/32.png) [@Daisy\_Mae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daisy_Mae)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/13 "2004-07-31T18:08:48Z")
Dump all of her hair conditioner out and replace it with the [new fast acting Nair](http://www.naircare.com/products/index.asp) and hope it really does work in a short period of time 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![kevja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2004, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/14 "2004-07-31T23:38:42Z")
I’m with Haj. I think the girl “likes you.” And where did the new Incubus go? Didn’t you say that the woman you had a thing with on the cruise had changed you. You were going to be stronger, not so apologetic, ect. I took that to mean more mature. Take it easy on the girl. She was wrong for listening and telling everyone. But don’t make things worse. Just drop it. And are you really that upset that all your friends now know that you’re not a virgin? ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2004, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/15 "2004-08-01T01:52:05Z")
> [@](#): > > “Ironically Titled” for $500, Alex. FURT, posts like that are why I have an altar to you in my living room. 🙂 INCUBUS, if you want to drive this chick batty – and why not? – just meet every catty comment she makes with a smug smile. ---
**Author:** ![Lizard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@Lizard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lizard)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2004, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/16 "2004-08-01T02:14:29Z")
I’ve had to deal with neurotic, nosy bitches like this before, and I can only parrot what everbody else has said: Living well is the best revenge. Just make sure you do it publicly. ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2004, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/17 "2004-08-01T02:37:03Z")
Well, I’ve calmed down a bit over this. One thing that really gave me pause was a heated conversation with my best friend over the phone regarding this. When I told him how much it bugged me how she was telling EVERYONE as if she was some sort of friggin victim, he commented, “But I thought you told me earlier you didn’t care what people thought.” And I realized, that yes, I didn’t give a damn about other people’s opinions on the matter! So why the hell was I so touchy about it all of the sudden? I guess because I felt like she was doing it to make me look bad. Plus, I came back from the cruise a much more confident person, and all of the sudden I’m not some pushover to her anymore- she really has to work to piss me off. Oh well. I suppose if I really wanted to be viscious I could tell all you dopers the lurid details of how she cheated on my best friend with an ex, something that ‘disturbed me so much I had to tell EVERYBODY’ but I guess I’ll leave it up to you. (its a pretty bizarre story) ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2004, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/18 "2004-08-01T03:06:40Z")
Don’t let other people live rent-free in your head. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![dry\_gear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@dry\_gear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dry_gear)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2004, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/19 "2004-08-01T03:09:41Z")
I kind of like bizarre stories. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2004, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702/20 "2004-08-01T10:58:21Z")
I had a dorm mate in college like this. She would come into my room, uninvited, looking for my roommate. I would be sitting on my bunk with my boyfriend watching tv. Her comment was always “FilmGeek, is that you? With a _BOY???_” Yes, Hannah. I’m with a boy, as I’m not gay (at least, I wasn’t entirely sure at the time) and I’m a better person than you. She’d go around the dorm telling people that I had a boyfriend and gee, who was I kidding, etc. Everyone else hated her, too. 🙂 Try not to let her get under your skin. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-sex-life-is-none-of-your-business/257702.md?page=2)