# My wife died this afternoon!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 24, 2004, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939 "2004-06-24T03:34:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Hometownboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/5e9695/32.png) [@Hometownboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hometownboy)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/121 "2004-06-25T06:57:44Z")
My deepest sympathy, **hlanlee**. I lost my wife, also named Connie, after 24 years together. In November it will be eight years since she died. You never get entirely over it, but i can tell you it does get easier with time. It may help in the grieving process to perform some personal rituals – things that have meaning only for you – beyond those of the funeral or memorial service. I visited the beach where I proposed to her, took my guitar, and played a simple song, “Connie’s Waltz” that I had written for her many years earlier. I also brought roses from our house (that she had planted) and left them at the exact spot where she accepted my proposal. When the date that would have been our 25th anniversary rolled around, I took my kids with me to Victoria, British Columbia where we had honeymooned. We were never able to afford the return journey and had planned to go for our 25th. It was not always easy, and there were some crying bits for all of us, but it was, for me, healing. The other bit of advice that came in the most handy for me was to make no major changes in your life at a time when you are unfocused and adrift. If you have kids, that’s triply important. They have already had a serious shock and desperately need the rest of their lives to be stable for a while. Good luck and remember that there are many friends here who care and are thinking about you. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/122 "2004-06-25T07:01:34Z")
I am very sorry for your loss, and will keep you in my thoughts. Bill ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/123 "2004-06-25T11:55:00Z")
My deepest condolences, **hlanlee**. You and your family will remain in my thoughts and prayers. ---
**Author:** ![Amberlei](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e56c9b/32.png) [@Amberlei](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amberlei)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/124 "2004-06-25T13:44:36Z")
I’m so sorry for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/125 "2004-06-25T14:19:02Z")
So sorry to hear of your loss. If anyone wishes to send flowers, this is at “Herndon & Sons Funeral Home” in Walterboro, SC. [This is the info for the funeral home](http://www.walterboro.org/s-f04.html). I’ll stop short of providing a link to the obit, but (needless to say), that’s where I got this info. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/126 "2004-06-25T15:01:10Z")
I’m so sorry, **hlanelee**. ---
**Author:** ![Archergal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c89c15/32.png) [@Archergal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Archergal)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/127 "2004-06-25T19:44:08Z")
I am so sorry for your loss, **hlanelee**. We never know how much time we have with the ones we love. God bless… ---
**Author:** ![FreeRange\_Maniac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/97f17d/32.png) [@FreeRange\_Maniac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FreeRange_Maniac)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/128 "2004-06-25T19:54:47Z")
I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![FX45\_4Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/4bbf92/32.png) [@FX45\_4Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FX45_4Ever)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/129 "2004-06-25T20:08:00Z")
☹ Condolences and my sympathies for your loss. ---
**Author:** ![hlanelee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3bc359/32.png) [@hlanelee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hlanelee)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2004, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/130 "2004-06-26T01:50:21Z")
Everybody, thanks for your thoughts. If someone would bring me food and buy electricity, I could sit here forever. hlanelee laughs ---
**Author:** ![JavaMaven1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@JavaMaven1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JavaMaven1)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2004, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/131 "2004-06-26T02:53:10Z")
Oh my god. I’m so sorry, **hlanelee**. You just mentioned her in the Brag On Your Spouse thread, but I had missed this thread a few days ago. My condolences and prayers are with you. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2004, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/132 "2004-06-26T17:47:55Z")
**hlanelee** , I am very sorry to hear of your loss. May you and your family find comfort and strength during this difficult time. ---
**Author:** ![Brainiac4](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brainiac4/32/3534_2.png) [@Brainiac4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac4)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2004, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/133 "2004-06-26T19:25:18Z")
My deepest sympathy. I had just read your posts about her and how special she was to you. I can’t even imagine how much pain you are in, and I am so deeply sorry that this happened to such a wonderful person. Know that there are those who care out here. ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2004, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/134 "2004-06-26T19:57:21Z")
I am very sorry that you have suffered this horrible loss. I went back and read your prior posts about your wife. The love and devotion between you two really shows in what you wrote about her. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the others who have suffered tragic losses recently. ---
**Author:** ![Guy\_Incognito](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guy_incognito/32/3920_2.png) [@Guy\_Incognito](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guy_Incognito)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2004, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/135 "2004-06-27T04:37:24Z")
hlanlee, I’m sorry to hear about this terrible thing which has befallen you. It feels like I’ve been offering a lot of condolences lately both in my “real world” life and my SDMB life. It never gets easier, but my feelings and wishes are the same: I’m deeply saddened and I pray that you find strength to make it through the days ahead. Take care. ---
**Author:** ![SlowMindThinking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@SlowMindThinking](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SlowMindThinking)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2004, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/136 "2004-06-27T06:47:09Z")
I hope it is some comfort to know how deeply your wife loved you. ---
**Author:** ![Quasimodem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/e274bd/32.png) [@Quasimodem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quasimodem)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2004, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/137 "2004-06-27T07:12:48Z")
> [@hlanelee](#): > > Everybody, thanks for your thoughts. If someone would bring me food and buy electricity, I could sit here forever. > > hlanelee laughs And we would sit here with you. You are _loved_, even though not all of us know you as well as we would like. It says a lot for the humane-ness of us all that we respond to one of our own as we have in this thread. There are more intelligent people here who can express it more eloquently than I ever could, but you are cared for here, **hlanelee**. If there is anything I can do for you, my e-mail is in my profile. Bill ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2004, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/138 "2004-06-27T07:41:56Z")
☹ ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2004, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/139 "2004-06-27T21:24:45Z")
**hlanelee** , she must have been a really special woman. I am so sorry for what you are having to go through now in losing her. Be easy on yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Ashkicker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4bbf92/32.png) [@Ashkicker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashkicker)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2004, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939/140 "2004-06-28T23:27:44Z")
Just checking in to see how you are doing and let you know you are still in our thoughts and prayers. Stay strong. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-died-this-afternoon/251939.md?page=8)