# My wife wants a baby **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 14, 2014, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058 "2014-07-14T09:32:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2014, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/121 "2014-07-20T04:49:20Z")
It would not be fair to the child if you were to have one and then kill yourself. It could very well mess up your child. In all seriousness, I hope that you do not change your mind and have a child. > [@My life and "It's a wonderful life"](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-life-and-its-a-wonderful-life/692521/1): > > In the old movie [It’s a Wonderful Life](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_a_Wonderful_Life) a guy considers suicide in order to get money from his life insurance policy. I’ve thought of that idea before but didn’t get approved probably due to my bipolar disorder. (Apparently about 1/3 of those with it commit suicide) Recently I came across a policy that costs $40 per fortnight for $1,000,000 of cover and you only have to wait 13 months before suicide is covered. Today I filled out an online application and disclosed my mental illness and how I’ve contemplated suicide more than once. The site said that I only qualified for $500,000 of cover for $30 per fortnight. And it wouldn’t ever pay for suicide. > > A bit later on my wife saw me on the computer and kept saying “what’s wrong?” and I kept on saying “nothing”. She kept on asking and asking. I eventually talked about life insurance and she didn’t think that was bad - until I explained that I was thinking of killing myself to get it. She said that she was suspecting that I was cheating on her with her friend. She’s said that a couple of times. > > A bit later she said that she’d rather have a kid that lots of money. And that she doesn’t want me to kill myself and that she’d miss me. I don’t want to have a baby. > > I’m going to watch that movie again - perhaps with my wife. > > BTW I’m no longer considering killing myself. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/122 "2014-07-22T03:17:23Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > Apparently the pill makes her anxious and she doesn’t want an implant in her arm so we use condoms. Isn’t that the riskiest form of birth control? ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/123 "2014-07-22T03:35:50Z")
> [@gigi](#): > > Isn’t that the riskiest form of birth control? No, that would be the “pull out” method. ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/124 "2014-07-22T03:48:09Z")
Or maybe the post-coitus Coca-Cola douche. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/125 "2014-07-22T04:54:04Z")
Withdrawal and condoms have about equal failure rates at pregnancy prevention. Spermicide alone is the worst, I believe. I mean, of the things actually recognized as contraception. ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/126 "2014-07-22T05:22:25Z")
I understand physicians have a name for couples that rely on the “withdrawal” method of birth control. They’re referred to as “parents”. ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/127 "2014-07-22T06:18:10Z")
> [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > I understand physicians have a name for couples that rely on the “withdrawal” method of birth control. They’re referred to as “parents”. Actually combining the withdrawal method(where both partners are taking it serious) and keeping track of ovulation is just as valid as any other with a comparable failure rate as condoms.(or that might be WM alone) Personally me and my wife use the WM along with tracking ovulation exclusively, it has not failed us in more than ten years. We have one son who was intentional, my wife could actually pinpoint the act that produced him.😛 Hell it can a lot of fun, both partners enjoy the creative ways of bringing each other to a finish at the wrong times of month. At least that is my experience. ---
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/128 "2014-07-22T06:30:28Z")
Aside from the unpleasance of of coitus interruptus, if you compare the failure rate to _condoms used correctly_, you get a much higher failure rate for CI. The only reason condoms fail a lot is that a lot of people don’t know how to use them, dammed “abstinence only” sex ed. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/129 "2014-07-22T08:14:29Z")
> [@StarvingButStrong](#): > > Or maybe the post-coitus Coca-Cola douche. I’ve heard of this before but don’t understand how it’s supposed to work. Do you shake the bottle vigorously beforehand? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/130 "2014-07-22T11:11:22Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I’ve heard of this before but don’t understand how it’s supposed to work. Do you shake the bottle vigorously beforehand? As long as you have enough Mentos in the vagina prior to CocaCola introduction, you’re set for a spectacular douche fountain. ---
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/131 "2014-07-22T11:18:38Z")
**Siam Sam** , you just drink half each with the douche you had unprotected sex with. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 11:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/132 "2014-07-22T11:33:41Z")
> [@RivkahChaya](#): > > Aside from the unpleasance of of coitus interruptus, if you compare the failure rate to _condoms used correctly_, you get a much higher failure rate for CI. The only reason condoms fail a lot is that a lot of people don’t know how to use them, dammed “abstinence only” sex ed. Sure, as long as you’re prepared to name your kid Perfect Use Chaya. 😉 Me, I live in Typical Use Reality and only compare Typical Use to Typical Use. It’s not an endorsement of withdrawal, it’s a condemnation of condoms for pregnancy prevention. They’re the best thing we’ve got for STI prevention, so yes, please do keep using them. But we’ve got much better methods of preventing pregnancy. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/133 "2014-07-22T12:22:33Z")
> [@JohnClay](#): > > I’d listen - unless by “listen” you mean obey. BTW this thread has influenced me - I’m definite to my wife about not having a baby now instead of being a bit on the fence. Wordsworth or Whitman? ---
**Author:** ![hyden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/35a633/32.png) [@hyden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hyden)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058/134 "2014-07-22T19:55:11Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > As long as you have enough Mentos in the vagina prior to CocaCola introduction, you’re set for a spectacular douche fountain. This line made me burst out giggling in my cubicle. Now I have about 15 people looking at me wondering what I am on. 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife-wants-a-baby/693058.md?page=6)