# My Wife **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 27, 2002, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895 "2002-04-27T02:19:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/21 "2002-04-27T04:46:51Z")
Is she still dating her gynecologist? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/22 "2002-04-27T04:50:33Z")
You can’t cook your own food? I mean, instead of waiting 45 minutes for your wife to do something for you, get off the couch and fix what you want, how you want it. Problem solved, no harsh words, you eat happy. Why is that so hard? ---
**Author:** ![red\_dragon60](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@red\_dragon60](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/red_dragon60)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/23 "2002-04-27T04:51:39Z")
Scylla, that motorcycle thing is a testament to your patience that you didn’t bust the door open, grab the first aid kit, bandage yourself, then flog her with it. God grant me the courage to change the things I can change, the serenity to live with those I cannot change, and the Buddha-like patience of Scylla. ---
**Author:** ![shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shrew)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/24 "2002-04-27T05:02:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by JohnT \* > You can’t cook your own food? I mean, instead of waiting 45 minutes for your wife to do something for you, get off the couch and fix what you want, how you want it. I got the impression that he does this (the FroPi). In the liverwurst sandwich incident, however, she had OFFERED…nay, INSISTED that she would fix him something special. Remember, he was more than willing to eat at the club. ---
**Author:** ![lorinada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5e925/32.png) [@lorinada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorinada)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/25 "2002-04-27T05:06:24Z")
And of course, she didn’t turn into a selfish, vapid idiot until _after_ you married her, right? ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/26 "2002-04-27T05:07:41Z")
Is that motorcycle story real or fiction? If real, I hope you have an exit strategy planned. ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/27 "2002-04-27T05:11:55Z")
**Scylla** , I can’t exactly cook worth much either, but I’d think that your wife should help you out when you need it! Never mind the cooking; what about lifting the heavy stuff when she obciously **can**? It’s not a quiestion of whether she can or can’t; she can! Of course, if the above makes mo sense, never mind. I’m feeling a little weird at the moment. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/28 "2002-04-27T05:12:41Z")
Scylla, do you guys actually _talk_, or do you just go around making statements? I feel like I’ve just wandered into an Ingmar Bergman film. ---
**Author:** ![belladonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9fc29f/32.png) [@belladonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/belladonna)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/29 "2002-04-27T11:22:57Z")
Do you love her? ---
**Author:** ![NightRabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbce88/32.png) [@NightRabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NightRabbit)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/30 "2002-04-27T11:57:23Z")
Every unhappily single woman cringes while reading the OP, I’m sure of it. God, I’ll never understand the things that husbands and wives can get away with. ---
**Author:** ![cagiva650](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cagiva650](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cagiva650)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/31 "2002-04-27T14:07:23Z")
I do like your posts **Scylla** but don’t you cook man? In my house on weekends I don’t cook and my husband hasn’t figured that out yet - I mean he’ll sit there buzzed on a pot of coffee and turning pale and when I drag out of bed well after the sun has risen he looks to me to start up a huge breakfast right away. I’ll toss a frozen english muffin on the counter for him and he still mopes! ---
**Author:** ![saepiroth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5ac83/32.png) [@saepiroth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saepiroth)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/32 "2002-04-27T15:24:48Z")
heh heh heh. scylla, it’s been said before, and it will be said again, but you REALLY REALLY NEED to put out a book, a collection of short stories either in the style of your posts here, or the actual posts (if you can get the mods to delete the originals so the Reader loses their rights to them). i would most certainly buy a copy of “The Elmo, The Sheep, and The Amish; Stories of Scylla” if you would be so kind as to contact an editor nad get it made. at least look into it; I really think it would work… ---
**Author:** ![cercaria](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/87869e/32.png) [@cercaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cercaria)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/33 "2002-04-27T16:48:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Scylla \* > **"Please? Be a good share bear. I’m hungry for a piece."** _ **SHARE BEAR?!?!?!!** _ :eek: That would be the breaking point for me. Is there a reason your wife runs away every time you’re in physical pain, or is she really as vapid as I’m thinking she is? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/34 "2002-04-27T17:01:17Z")
I bet the Amish kids paid her off. ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/35 "2002-04-27T17:40:12Z")
…and she surreptitiously feeds woodchucks. ---
**Author:** ![Tansu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/36 "2002-04-27T18:36:25Z")
Order a delivery of roses. For the nearest sheep. ---
**Author:** ![graceland](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ec9cab/32.png) [@graceland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/graceland)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/37 "2002-04-27T18:46:17Z")
My ex-husband held the opinion that a meal shouldn’t take longer to cook than it took to eat. I envisioned a life of corned beef hash pop tarts. (For about a decade, I wasn’t far off.) Crab topped pompano, risotto w/ red onion and green apple, wild mushroom bread pudding, etc. this is the stuff I cook. His response: “Just some Dinty Moore, ok?” Very passive aggressive icky game, hence the divorce. This post just made me so sad. And the food is the least of it. The whole motocycle incident is horrifying. I just sort of hope it’s not true and I’ll end up looking like a putz for buying into the story. Otherwise, how could you stay with someone who watched, then locked a door on your hurt? ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/38 "2002-04-27T19:53:15Z")
**Scylla,** you may rant and rave about your wife, the way we all do, but I bet you couldn’t / wouldn’t want to live without her. The things you describe are just (small) parts of the whole, and she is the sum of her parts, as are we all. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/39 "2002-04-27T19:57:02Z")
Gee **Scylla** why does she put up with you? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![GKW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@GKW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GKW)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2002, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895/40 "2002-04-27T21:25:48Z")
The woman described is not the Scylla wife. The Scylla wife is smart, sexy, and strong. In fact she’s better looking than Scylla deserves. The Scylla wife is not a spoiled brat. She can shrivel misbehavior with a look. The Scylla wife stands by her man. She is nurturing. She makes me smile. The Scylla wife does not make caca for supper. I refuse to believe this libel. I’d sooner believe that Scylla enjoys ~prancing~ around in the Scylla wife’s lacey, orange, teddy shorts. Hah! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wife/105895.md?page=3)