# My wife's ass **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 22, 2005, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677 "2005-03-22T03:31:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DrLoveGun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@DrLoveGun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrLoveGun)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/1 "2005-03-22T03:31:17Z")
Would it be wrong to put a cork in it so I can have some fresh air? ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/2 "2005-03-22T03:42:16Z")
Yes. If she’s anything like my wife, the cork could explode out with tremendous force, causing unknown damage and casualties. ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/3 "2005-03-22T03:46:02Z")
It depends on whether or not your wife ‘talks out of her ass’ or not. A cork would just get chewed up and spit back on your face. Likely. ---
**Author:** ![inkleberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f17d59/32.png) [@inkleberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inkleberry)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/4 "2005-03-22T03:47:39Z")
You are mean. Tonight I extract my revenge. Remember, I am a delicate flower of womanhood and you would be lost without my delicate charms. ---
**Author:** ![Chairman\_Pow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/838e76/32.png) [@Chairman\_Pow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chairman_Pow)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/5 "2005-03-22T03:49:57Z")
> [@inkleberry](#): > > You are mean. Tonight I \*\*extract \*\* my revenge. Bolding mine. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/6 "2005-03-22T04:08:49Z")
Ain’t love a gas? ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/7 "2005-03-22T04:25:05Z")
Damnit, I guess this means my wife is cheating on me. Not only that, she even went so far as to actually marry **DrLoveGun**. ☹ Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![Reeder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/8 "2005-03-22T04:30:58Z")
Seems to me there is a rule about joke threads. I might be wrong though. ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/9 "2005-03-22T04:34:05Z")
The only thing being broken in this thread is wind. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/10 "2005-03-22T04:37:41Z")
Extract? Exude, express, even extrude, but extract? ---
**Author:** ![Reeder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/11 "2005-03-22T04:38:44Z")
Ms Bodini doesn’t agree. > [@](#): > > I really, REALLY don’t want to see joke threads in the Pit. ANY joke threads. If the jokes are too nasty for MPSIMS, then they’re too nasty for the Straight Dope Message Board. ---
**Author:** ![Mauvaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mauvaise/32/11084_2.png) [@Mauvaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mauvaise)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/12 "2005-03-22T04:42:15Z")
> [@Reeder](#): > > Ms Bodini doesn’t agree. Is there a rule that a pitting must be in anger and not in jest? Humour doesn’t necessarily equate a joke. Maybe the OP is really sick of the smell that emits from his wife’s ass - god knows I’m sick of the smell that comes from mine! If his wife has IBS, then he has every reason to open a pit thread about the smell! ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/13 "2005-03-22T04:42:31Z")
Maybe she’ll let it go to post 239. The next post would have been 240 anyway. ---
**Author:** ![inkleberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f17d59/32.png) [@inkleberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inkleberry)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/14 "2005-03-22T04:49:39Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > Extract? Exude, express, even extrude, but extract? Extract. Revenge in unpleasant business. ---
**Author:** ![Earthling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/90db22/32.png) [@Earthling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthling)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/15 "2005-03-22T05:12:16Z")
> [@inkleberry](#): > > Extract. [Exact](http://www.bartleby.com/61/86/E0258600.html). Transitive verb. ---
**Author:** ![inkleberry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/f17d59/32.png) [@inkleberry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/inkleberry)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/16 "2005-03-22T05:15:05Z")
> [@Earthling](#): > > [Exact](http://www.bartleby.com/61/86/E0258600.html). Transitive verb. Not for what I have in mind. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/17 "2005-03-22T05:15:38Z")
> [@Earthling](#): > > [Exact](http://www.bartleby.com/61/86/E0258600.html). Transitive verb. Blow it out your ass. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/18 "2005-03-22T05:39:32Z")
Sounds like you have a weapon of mass destruction, a delivery mechanism, and the will to use it. Goodbye California. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/19 "2005-03-22T05:49:49Z")
It’s the San Andreas fart! The true crack of doom. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 5:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677/20 "2005-03-22T05:54:48Z")
Doesn’t **lieu** normally have a nose for these kinds of threads? Maybe he’ll sniff it out later. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/my-wifes-ass/295677.md?page=2)