# Mystery quote: ''It doesn't do anything. That's the beauty of it.'' **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 26, 2007, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487 "2007-03-26T01:19:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2007, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/61 "2007-03-28T01:44:31Z")
I know the quote, but I never knew there was an internet hunt for the source. I figure **Earl Snake-Hips Tucker** found the actual source and the rest is public consciousness, a la “Play it again, Sam” and “Elementary, my dear Watson”. But darned if my brain doesn’t want badly to place the whole mystery quote. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Scruloose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e68b1a/32.png) [@Scruloose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scruloose)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2007, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/62 "2007-03-28T02:34:11Z")
[QUOTE=Oslo Ostragoth] Got link? [/QUOTE] [Link.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=398132) **Warning!** **14 k of g in a f p d** comes as a word puzzle to take mentally. It usually is taken once a day. Follow the directions on your prescription label carefully, and ask your doctor or MENSA neighbor to explain any part you do not understand. Take **14 k of g in a f p d** exactly as directed. Do not take more or less of it or take it more often than prescribed by your doctor. **14 k of g in a f p d** helps decrease the craving for crosswords or sudoku, but does not treat addiction. It is important that you attend all counseling, support group meetings, and other treatments prescribed by your doctor. Work on **14 k of g in a f p d** regularly. Do not stop working on it without talking to your doctor. If, in the past 7-10 days, you have taken an energy drink or coffee, tell your doctor before taking the first dose of **14 k of g in a f p d**. **14 k of g in a f p d** will cause withdrawal if you have caffeine in your blood. Your doctor may perform a challenge test before you begin taking **14 k of g in a f p d**. A small dose of **14 k of g in a f p d** will be injected into your brain or under your skin, and you will be watched for symptoms of energy withdrawal. If you have symptoms, you will need to wait a few days before beginning **14 k of g in a f p d**. You should work on **14 k of g in a f p d** as directed by your physician. If you take heroin or any other opioid in small doses, you will not perceive any effect. Do not take large doses of heroin or any other narcotic; you may die or sustain serious injury, including coma. Before working on **14 k of g in a f p d** , \* tell your doctor and pharmacist if you are allergic to brain teasers, other narcotics, or any other word problems. \* tell your doctor and pharmacist what prescription and nonprescription medications you are taking, especially anti-diarrhea drugs, medications for cough and colds, pain medication, and Red Bull. \* tell your doctor if you have either of the conditions listed in the IMPORTANT WARNING section. \* tell your doctor if you are pregnant, plan to become pregnant, or are breast-feeding. If you become pregnant while working on **14 k of g in a f p d** , call your doctor. \* if you are having surgery, including dental surgery, tell the doctor or dentist that you are thinking about **14 k of g in a f p d**. \* you should know that this puzzle may make you drowsy. Do not drive a car or operate machinery until you know how this puzzle affects you. \* remember that alcohol can add to the drowsiness caused by this puzzle. \* you should know that if you take small doses of heroin or other narcotics while thinking about **14 k of g in a f p d** , you will not feel any effects. If you take large doses of heroin or other narcotics while working on **14 k of g in a f p d** , you may die, go into a coma, or have other serious injuries. **14 k of g in a f p d** may cause side effects. Tell your doctor if any of these symptoms are severe or do not go away: \* upset stomach \* anxiety \* sleeplessness \* uncontrollable rage If you experience any of the following symptoms or those listed in the IMPORTANT WARNING section, call your doctor immediately: \* confusion \* drowsiness \* hallucinations \* vomiting \* diarrhea \* bone and joint pain \* skin crawling \* stomach pain \* white bowel movements \* skin rash \* tossing your computer right out of the fucking window ---
**Author:** ![tanstaafl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba8739/32.png) [@tanstaafl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanstaafl)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2007, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/63 "2007-03-28T03:29:51Z")
[14 kinds of gifts in a full Puggalika dana](http://www.urbandharma.org/udnl2/nl010604.html)? (May be Dana-parami, but that could be a translation thing?) ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2007, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/64 "2007-03-28T04:25:21Z")
I also remember hearing this quote, and the context I’m vaguely remembering is from _Futurama_, something that Prof. Farnsworth might’ve said. Considering how that show is chock-full of references, I wouldn’t rule it out. ---
**Author:** ![Ghanima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Ghanima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ghanima)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2007, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/65 "2007-03-30T22:26:47Z")
I strongly believe that you guys who think this quote exists elsewhere are wrong. You have just heard it enough times, and imagined it enough times, that you think it’s real. Just look at how many people say “I think it was _this_ actor”, or “I think it was in _this_ movie”…and they are all not only wrong, but these memories are all totally different from each other. Some passages from [this article](http://psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-19950101-000021.html): > [@](#): > > Elizabeth Loftus is a research psychologist who has devoted her life to the study of memory, its mystery and malleability. Of late, she has gained ingenious experiments, which have shown repeatedly that about 25 percent of individuals can be easily induced to remember events that never happened to them–false memories that feel absolutely real. > [@](#): > > The stories are legendary. Elizabeth Loftus has found ordinary memory to be so malleable that she can prompt volunteers to “remember nonexistent broken glass and tape recorders; to think of a clean-shaven man as having a mustache, of straight hair as curly, of hammers as screwdrivers, to place a barn in a bucolic scene that contained no buildings at all, to believe in characters who never existed and events that never happened.” > [@](#): > > If we concentrate on generating images that then get recorded in the web of neurons as if they were real, we might actually convince ourselves that confabulations are true. (This might also explain how some individuals who lie about an event eventually convince themselves, through repeated lying, that the lie is true.) ---
**Author:** ![BlueSilver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@BlueSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlueSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2007, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/66 "2007-03-31T00:31:36Z")
[QUOTE=Ghanima] I strongly believe that you guys who think this quote exists elsewhere are wrong. You have just heard it enough times, and imagined it enough times, that you think it’s real. Just look at how many people say “I think it was _this_ actor”, or “I think it was in _this_ movie”…and they are all not only wrong, but these memories are all totally different from each other. Some passages from [this article](http://psychologytoday.com/articles/pto-19950101-000021.html): [/QUOTE] No offense, but please stop telling me that I’ve made up my memories. You’ve been beating this drum for awhile now and it’s kind of insulting. Obviously, I can’t speak for everyone, but I know that I’m familiar with a very particular reading of the quote ("it doesn’t _do_ anything) that hasn’t been confirmed yet. My belief is that there are probably lots of very similar quotes throughout multiple mediums (books, movies, commercials, etc.) and maybe everybody is trying to fit them into the same mold. That’s not the same as imagining they know something they’ve never heard… Here’s an example of a similar quote that could be fooling people: Memorable quotes for “The Simpsons” Blood Feud (1991) [looking at a giant stone head Mr. Burns has had delivered to the Simpson house] Homer: Marge, what does it do? Marge: It doesn’t do anything. Homer: Marge, really, what does it do? Marge: Whatever it does, it’s doing it right now. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2007, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/67 "2007-03-31T17:22:44Z")
Marge Gunderson: “Okay! But are ya sure?” ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2007, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/68 "2007-03-31T18:22:40Z")
[QUOTE=BlueSilver] No offense, but please stop telling me that I’ve made up my memories. You’ve been beating this drum for awhile now and it’s kind of insulting. Obviously, I can’t speak for everyone, but I know that I’m familiar with a very particular reading of the quote ("it doesn’t _do_ anything) that hasn’t been confirmed yet. My belief is that there are probably lots of very similar quotes throughout multiple mediums (books, movies, commercials, etc.) and maybe everybody is trying to fit them into the same mold. That’s not the same as imagining they know something they’ve never heard… Here’s an example of a similar quote that could be fooling people: Memorable quotes for “The Simpsons” Blood Feud (1991) [looking at a giant stone head Mr. Burns has had delivered to the Simpson house] Homer: Marge, what does it do? Marge: It doesn’t do anything. Homer: Marge, really, what does it do? Marge: Whatever it does, it’s doing it right now. [/QUOTE] First of all, to insist that you remember an actual experience in which the quote in question was said in a movie, TV show, radio, etc., shows that you are ignorant of how memory works. The point to the reference you are deriding is that you **simply cannot state such a thing with positivity.** If you could, you could state the exact situation, in such a way that it could be verified. This is one of the first practical things one learns as an attorney: relying upon memory is a notoriously tricky thing. Everyone who thinks they have seen or heard this quote has an opinion as to where. Some are definite as to the source, but it turns out they are wrong. Others are vague as to the source, leading one to believe they may well be conflating multiple experiences upon the prompt of the alleged quote in question, or simply are “remembering” based upon the suggestion of the quote. It isn’t hard to demonstrate to yourself that this is possible; simply talk one time to a friend about a supposed experience the two of you had together in the past. Without too much difficulty, you can get the friend to recall something that never actually happened. I, too, have thought I have heard the line in question. I cannot put my finger on when or where. Everytime someone suggests something I have seen (for example, _Mr. Roberts_, I think, “yeah, yeah, that’s it!” Then I stop to think more and realize I don’t recall that for certain at all, even if I can just hear Jack Lemmon saying it. So don’t reject the assertion out of hand, and don’t be offended by it. In the absence of some better recollection, you may well simply be mis-remembering. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2007, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/69 "2007-03-31T21:51:39Z")
[QUOTE=BlueSilver] No offense, but please stop telling me that I’ve made up my memories. [/QUOTE] No offense is intended: _this is the way memory works, **for all of us.** _ You, me, your mailman, the Pope, Rosie O’Donnell, everybody. The cited research shows how easy it is to manipulate and reconstruct one’s memories such that one can believe, _absolutely and unshakably,_ in the fact of a provable fiction. It’s the way it is, whether you like it or not. ---
**Author:** ![CC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f1d935/32.png) [@CC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CC)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2007, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/70 "2007-03-31T22:02:05Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] No offense is intended: _this is the way memory works, **for all of us.** _ You, me, your mailman, the Pope, Rosie O’Donnell, everybody. The cited research shows how easy it is to manipulate and reconstruct one’s memories such that one can believe, _absolutely and unshakably,_ in the fact of a provable fiction. It’s the way it is, whether you like it or not. [/QUOTE] I think you are a little too close to this. The reports on the thread, including the one you refer to, are the evidence that memory works that way. There’s no need to belittle the reports, or to suggest someone is ignorant of something. These are the very types of reports that provide cognitive scientists with a foundation for a theory. Labratory and clinical experiments only back up what the evidence from real life is showing - what you said. It’s also a bit arrogant to imply that you know what we remember or don’t remember. You don’t know for sure, either, although I grant the fact that someone hasn’t solved the problem suggests that you are correct. That’s what someone is twitching about. To tell someone that they don’t know anything about the way memory works is to tell someone to ignore their entire experience. It’s the tone, not the ultimate content. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2007, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/71 "2007-03-31T23:26:49Z")
[QUOTE=CC] I think you are a little too close to this. [/QUOTE] I don’t know what that means. Re the rest of it, “your memories are unreliable” **!=** “your memories are wrong.” ---
**Author:** ![BlueSilver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@BlueSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlueSilver)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/72 "2007-04-01T01:44:48Z")
[QUOTE=CC] It’s also a bit arrogant to imply that you know what we remember or don’t remember. You don’t know for sure, either, although I grant the fact that someone hasn’t solved the problem suggests that you are correct. That’s what someone is twitching about. To tell someone that they don’t know anything about the way memory works is to tell someone to ignore their entire experience. It’s the tone, not the ultimate content. [/QUOTE] Exactly. I absolutely agree that memory is malleable. I’ve never suggested that there was anything false about the research Ghanima quoted. That explanation could certainly account for some number of us posters. And since I have no proof otherwise, I have to admit that I could be one of those number. However, I stand by the belief that to insist that every boardmember who still believes a second and more recent source for the quote exists have just made up the memory _is_ too presumptive and at least a little condescending. And the fact that we can’t immediately provide concrete evidence of a second source for the quote in no way disproves its existance. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/73 "2007-04-01T02:27:56Z")
Since I opened this thread. I’ll grant that it seems pretty strange for this episode of a TV series that last aired 10 years ago to be the source of it. However, it does have the essential elements of the original quote “It doesn’t DO anything. That’s the beauty of it.” Compare to Meredith’s Harold Harold "Do? I Nothing. . . Nothing. . . That’s the beauty of it. Emphasis on the word “do,” the mention that the contraption doesn’t do anything, and the exact quote “That’s the beauty of it.” So far, no one has provided any reliable source for a quote that is any close than this. Every single one falls far short of those standards. But it seems pretty unsatisfying that the only citation as of this moment is from a forty-year-old TV series that last aired a decade ago. Similarly, it’s unsatisfying that. . . a) the earliest citation for “the whole nine yards” is an obscure 1967 Viet Nam war novel that doesn’t give any context for what it means, b) the “ancient Chinese curse” “May you live in interesting times” is from an obscure 1950 sci-fi story by Eric Frank Russell, c) the stereotypical “Oriental riff” seems to date back to the 1974 hit "Kung Fu Fighting, although many similar riffs exist–but that’s the earliest that that exact one has been traced. I’d lump this episode of “Burkes’ Law” in with those. It seems a little odd, but as of this moment, it’s the best solution yet uncovered. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/74 "2007-04-01T02:42:57Z")
I think you got it, **Earl Snake-Lips Tucker**. You’re the only one in the history of the internet to actually provide a decent cite to back up the claim. It’s an awesome find, to be sure. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/75 "2007-04-01T05:55:25Z")
> [@](#): > > No offense, but please stop telling me that I’ve made up my memories. If not you, then who is it who did make up your memories? It seems like it would be a lot harder for anyone else to do it for you. Personally, my only exposure to this quote has been people quoting it here. I always figured it was from Futurama, since that’s something that’s in-referenced here often, it seemed the right style, and it would account for my lack of familiarity with the original (I’ve been without a TV since before Futurama started). So there’s another data point for you: Whatever it was that popularized this line, it wasn’t something I’m familiar with. ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/76 "2007-04-01T07:31:24Z")
So where have you revealed this breaking news on the web? I’d like to read other peoples reactions to this. ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_Rhosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@Sir\_Rhosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_Rhosis)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/77 "2007-04-01T08:15:24Z")
Star Trek fans may be getting it conflated with a line of Kirk’s from “The Voyage Home.” After having received a pair of spectacles from McCoy in “The Wrath of Khan,” Kirk, while back in time to 1986 in “The Voyage Home,” sells them to an antiques dealer. Spock asks: “…weren’t those a gift from Dr. McCoy?” Kirk replies, “Yes, and they will be again, that’s the beauty of it.” Sir Rhosis ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2007, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/78 "2007-04-01T14:53:18Z")
[QUOTE=Earl Snake-Hips Tucker] Similarly, it’s unsatisfying that. . . b) the “ancient Chinese curse” “May you live in interesting times” is from an obscure 1950 sci-fi story by Eric Frank Russell, [/QUOTE] Actually, according to the _Yale Book of Quotations_, it’s cited from 1939. Sorry for the slight hijack. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2007, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/79 "2007-04-02T10:41:50Z")
Well, if it matters… I just watched my dvd of the Beatles’ animated feature “Yellow Submarine” tonight (Feature Run Time: 1 hour 30 minutes . COLOR . 1968), and didn’t hear the exchange…although that’s where it sounded familiar to me. Still, a cool movie, if you haven’t seen it. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2007, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487/80 "2007-04-02T12:11:48Z")
[QUOTE=Dijon Warlock] Well, if it matters… I just watched my dvd of the Beatles’ animated feature “Yellow Submarine” tonight (Feature Run Time: 1 hour 30 minutes . COLOR . 1968), and didn’t hear the exchange…although that’s where it sounded familiar to me. Still, a cool movie, if you haven’t seen it. [/QUOTE] If by “cool” you mean “legendarily bad”, yes, it is an _extraordinarily_ “cool” movie. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mystery-quote-it-doesnt-do-anything-thats-the-beauty-of-it/397487.md?page=5)