# N Korea develops new 'super drink' **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 5, 2010, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062 "2010-06-05T15:11:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Covered\_In\_Bees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7ab992/32.png) [@Covered\_In\_Bees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Covered_In_Bees)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/21 "2010-06-06T00:18:07Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > From what I’ve [heard](http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/23/magazine/23counterfeit.html), they trade in really good counterfeit American hundred dollar bills, counterfeit Viagra and very pure methamphetamines. This sounds like the beginning of a very fun weekend! EDIT: Well, if the Viagra weren’t fake. The fake money could be passed off somewhere I’m sure. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/22 "2010-06-06T01:08:59Z")
From the North Korean article: > [@](#): > > It, with effects of both preventive and curative treatment, helps improve mental and retentive faculties by multiplying brain cells. > > It also protects skin from wrinkles and black spots and prevents such geriatric diseases as cerebral haemorrhage, myocardium and brain infarction by removing acid effete matters in time. > > It, much higher than quality cosmetics in anti-oxidation capacity, is efficacious for different skin diseases, including allergic dermatitis. It also makes skin fair. And it makes skin fair! Awesome! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/23 "2010-06-06T02:46:18Z")
Is Kim Jong-Il the inventor? Wouldn’t surprise me if the North Koreans claimed he was. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/24 "2010-06-06T04:10:10Z")
Our Dear Leader has given us the most healthful and advanced energy drink in the whole world, so that we may work longer hours in the factories and fields and be ever more vigilant against the American Criminals. Soon we will be a nation of immortal super beings, recognized by the entire world as the most advanced, most wise and most auspicious nation on all of the Earth! Just please, dear god, give us some rice! ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/25 "2010-06-06T04:16:27Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > Is Kim Jong-Il the inventor? Wouldn’t surprise me if the North Koreans claimed he was. Since he is the inventor of _everything,_ of course all praise goes to Kim Jong-Il! He works endlessly and tirelessly to improve the wonderful life of all of his worshipful subjects. Why he works so hard he even missed the last Mass Games, and 8000 participants had to perform without his inspiring and illustrious presence. The man is truly a saint…er, god. Long live The General! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 10:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/26 "2010-06-06T10:39:58Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Our Dear Leader has given us the most healthful and advanced energy drink in the whole world, so that we may work longer hours in the factories and fields and be ever more vigilant against the American Criminals. Soon we will be a nation of immortal super beings, recognized by the entire world as the most advanced, most wise and most auspicious nation on all of the Earth! > > Just please, dear god, give us some rice! But as long as American drink Red Bull, we will have air superiority. ---
**Author:** ![shijinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@shijinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shijinn)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/27 "2010-06-06T11:21:02Z")
> [@](#): > > … For every shot you take, Americans will appear one level lower than they actually are. … _hic_ ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/28 "2010-06-06T13:51:16Z")
> [@wunderkammer](#): > > It also removes all of your “acid effete matters”, whatever those are. > > I’m guessing they’re similar to free radicals, but…pansier? 😃 But don’t be silly, there are no free radicals in North Korea. ---
**Author:** ![wunderkammer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ed8c4c/32.png) [@wunderkammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wunderkammer)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/29 "2010-06-06T17:32:20Z")
And you win the thread. ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/30 "2010-06-06T18:59:11Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Wait till they learn whiskey can make a man bulletproof… Which goes a long way toward explaining Tony Stark. . .😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/31 "2010-06-06T20:29:38Z")
> [@wunderkammer](#): > > And you win the thread. Agreed. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2010, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/32 "2010-06-06T21:42:24Z")
[Auto-Vending machine]Welcome to **Kim’s Jr** , would you like to try our _EXTRA-BIG-ASS-KIMCHI_, now with more _ **MOLECULES!** _ ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2010, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/33 "2010-06-09T07:07:33Z")
I thought they’d discovered something similar to the [Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_Galactic_Gargle_Blaster#Pan-Galactic_Gargle_Blaster), but with ingredients available on Earth. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2010, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/34 "2010-06-09T10:23:02Z")
Does it involve kim chi? ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2010, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/35 "2010-06-09T12:24:39Z")
Seoulent Green? Ah no, wrong Korea… ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2010, 12:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/36 "2010-06-09T12:29:30Z")
Kim Jong-il pees in every vat. God pee is revivifying. All his people can then have part of him as themselves to cherish. ---
**Author:** ![Mahaloth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mahaloth/32/1079_2.png) [@Mahaloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mahaloth)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2010, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/37 "2010-06-10T02:23:12Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > Is Kim Jong-Il the inventor? Wouldn’t surprise me if the North Koreans claimed he was. I think they are crediting scientists in this one. I’m sure they made it for the General, though. He should drink it. He looks like he needs it. I swear, he looks like he could die any minute. Probably all that Hennesy. ---
**Author:** ![Bayesian\_Empirimancer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6de8d8/32.png) [@Bayesian\_Empirimancer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayesian_Empirimancer)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2010, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062/38 "2010-06-21T14:12:47Z")
> [@Covered\_In\_Bees](#): > > Ya know, when cells start multiplying in people’s brains usually they call it brain cancer. > > And all these “microelements” just sounds like fancy talk for “dirt” but that’s just me and my opinion. 😃 Now I ain’t too smart, but from these here parts, we call that neurogenesis, mostly in them smeller “olfactory” systems thing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/n-korea-develops-new-super-drink/542062.md?page=1)