# Name my twelve year old!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [November 5, 2001, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571 "2001-11-05T07:25:18Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@zoogirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoogirl)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/1 "2001-11-05T07:25:18Z")
Okay everyone, my son has been getting really interested in the Dope, and being a kid of great taste and wisdom, wants to join up! Now, the only problem is, we can’t come up with a cool enough name for him. He likes cats, dogs, wolves, trucks, machinery and cadets. Any suggestions? Now as I may have mentioned, the kid is dyslexic, but possesed of a great imagination, and a fair dose of intelligence, if I do say so myself! I will be reading SELECTED posts to him and writing out his replys–straight dictation, no I won’t be doing any of the composition. Just remember the spelling and typo’s will be mine, though!
So, Dopers, there it is. You don’t get a chance to name a twelve year old too often, so go for it!
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### Author:  [@Mercutio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercutio)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/2 "2001-11-05T07:35:26Z")
Ye of little faith
We’re so going to curropt this poor child’s mind. One example being the “Without your pants on!” thread 😃
I was going to comment that you need to be 13 to join, but then I remembered you only need your parents’ permission and it looks like his mother is pretty gung ho about it.
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### Author:  [@zoogirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoogirl)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/3 "2001-11-05T07:39:38Z")
SELECTED THREADS! SELECTED THREADS!
He’ll be thirteen in January anyway. Besides, he’s got a fifteen year old brother and a dad that plays in a band. Believe me, he could probably shock YOU!
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### Author:  [@Darkscyde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darkscyde)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/4 "2001-11-05T07:43:27Z")
Hmmmm…here goes…Iron Wolf, Kid4X4, Boy Wonder, Wolfboy, KitKat, Bad Dawg…gettin corny yet? Ummmm…Werewolf, Dire Wolf (I like wolves too…cant ya tell?) Well…there’s my offering…take it for what its work my dear. Cheers!!
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### Author:  [@DPWhite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DPWhite)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/5 "2001-11-05T07:44:08Z")
How about Zoo’s Deduction? You know, the IRS deduction zoogirl and zooboy get?
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### Author:  [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/6 "2001-11-05T08:03:14Z")
The age limit here is 13, with or without parental approval. The kid’s going to have to wait until January.
[http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=1218643#post1218643](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=1218643#post1218643)
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### Author:  [@Mercutio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercutio)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/7 "2001-11-05T08:14:12Z")
Well, I was wrong. Thanks bibliophage.
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### Author:  [@zoogirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoogirl)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/8 "2001-11-05T08:14:22Z")
Okay, at least that gives us time to come up with a truely awesome name! He’ll be seeing ya on the seventeenth. We can do a combination “Welcome” and “Happy Birthday” thread. At least there won’t be any question about his permission slip!
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### Author:  [@psychogumby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychogumby)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/9 "2001-11-05T11:50:28Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by DPWhite \*
> \*\*How about Zoo’s Deduction? You know, the IRS deduction zoogirl and zooboy get? \*\*
zoodependent?
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### Author:  [@11811](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/11811)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/10 "2001-11-05T12:52:45Z")
Since he’s been put on hold, I think his name should incorporate the phrase “long-awaited.”
But that’s just me being literal.
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### Author:  [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/11 "2001-11-05T13:30:37Z")
**Wind-Up Canine**
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### Author:  [@Kantalooppi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kantalooppi)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/12 "2001-11-05T14:05:41Z")
> [@](#):
>
> He likes cats, dogs, wolves, trucks, machinery and cadets.
**Machine Truck Cadet MeowWoofHowl**
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### Author:  [@modro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/modro)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/13 "2001-11-05T15:15:41Z")
ZooSpawn
I dunno, it just has a good ring to it 😃
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### Author:  [@Billy\_Baroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billy_Baroo)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/14 "2001-11-05T15:22:58Z")
SingleMalt.
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### Author:  [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/15 "2001-11-05T15:40:27Z")
You’re kid’s twelve, and you haven’t named him yet? What do the kids call him at school, “Hey, you!”?
Sorry, someone had to say it. As for the name, how about zoolander?
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### Author:  [@Ferrous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferrous)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/16 "2001-11-05T18:19:48Z")
How 'bout:
**Mowgli
Whatwolf** (y’know, a play on w(h)erewolf?)
**Truckasaurus** (bonus points for Simpson’s reference)
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### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/17 "2001-11-05T18:42:01Z")
Spawn of Zoo
> [@](#):
>
> He likes cats, dogs, wolves, trucks, machinery and cadets.
Monster Cat-ersaurus John Deer Mike the Mulligan Steam Shovel Solider Boy.
Colassal Boy
Tin Soldier
Bob from Accounting
Runs with Wolves
Dances with Poodles ( heh)
Cat-Dog-Wolf-Truck Boy
The Wolf Who Cried Boy (actual book title)
Not So Bad Wolf
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### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2001, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/18 "2001-11-05T18:48:58Z")
Spawn of Zoo
> [@](#):
>
> He likes cats, dogs, wolves, trucks, machinery and cadets.
Monster Cat-ersaurus John Deer Mike the Mulligan Steam Shovel Solider Boy.
Colassal Boy
Tin Soldier
Bob from Accounting
Runs with Wolves
Dances with Poodles ( heh)
Cat-Dog-Wolf-Truck Boy
The Wolf Who Cried Boy (actual book title)
Not So Bad Wolf
---
### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 6, 2001, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/19 "2001-11-06T02:13:18Z")
Spawn of Zoo
> [@](#):
>
> He likes cats, dogs, wolves, trucks, machinery and cadets.
Monster Cat-ersaurus John Deer Mike the Mulligan Steam Shovel Solider Boy.
Colassal Boy
Tin Soldier
Bob from Accounting
Runs with Wolves
Dances with Poodles ( heh)
Cat-Dog-Wolf-Truck Boy
The Wolf Who Cried Boy (actual book title)
Not So Bad Wolf
---
### Author:  [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)
#### Post date: [November 6, 2001, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-my-twelve-year-old/91571/20 "2001-11-06T02:26:49Z")
WHOAAAAAAA.
Stop the presses.
How did that happen?
Sorry folk?
On the plus side, I just padded my post count 🙂
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