# Name that rank!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [May 9, 2007, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328 "2007-05-09T00:10:34Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/1 "2007-05-09T00:10:34Z")
Below is a list of fictional characters that hold some kind of military rank (from Yeoman on up through General). The trick here isn’t guessing where they came from — though they’re not all terribly obvious — but to get credit for the score, you also have to guess the rank.
Good luck! And watch out for the trick questions… 🙂
Alaric Morgan
Anatol Gogol
Anthony Rogers
Anthony Sir Cecil Hogmanny Melchitt
Beverly Crusher
Cassio Tagge
Celes Chere
Crix Madine
Dmitri Gredenko
Donald Cragen
Eärnur
Edmund Duke
Edward Jellico
Ellen Ripley
Esther McQueen
Father John Patrick Francis Mulcahey
Firmus Piett
George S Hammond
Georgi Koskov
H.M. Murdock
Han Pritcher
Hector Barbossa
Henry Blake
Hoshi Sato
James Bond
Janice Rand
John “Hannibal” Smith
John McLane
John Ryker
Johnathan Archer
Kevin Darling
Kira Nerys
Lucien Lacroix
Maggie Beckett
Major Major Major
Malcolm Reynolds
Margaret Houlihan
Max Eckhardt
Maximilian Veers
Nathan Bridger
Nick Fury
Paolo Cassius
Rachel Garrett
Radar O’Reilly
Reginald Barclay
Samantha Carter
Sarah “Mac” Mackenzie
Sherman T. Potter
Sir Geoffrey Tolwyn
Stanley Tweedle
Steve Austin
Steve Trevor
Templeton Peck
Thomas Riker
Trapper John McIntyre
Valeris
Wade Eiling
Webelo Zapp Brannigan
William Hague
Wolf Larsen
---
### Author:  [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/2 "2007-05-09T00:18:55Z")
Anthony Sir Cecil Hogmanny Melchitt - General (Blackadder)
Celes Chere - Also General (Final Fantasy VI)
Father John Patrick Francis Mulcahey - IIRC, he finally made Lieutenant in about the middle of Potter’s term. (MASH)
Henry Blake - Colonel (MASH)
John “Hannibal” Smith - Also Colonel, IIRC (A-Team)
Johnathan Archer - Captain (Enterprise)
Kevin Darling - Captain (Blackadder)
Kira Nerys - Colonel (Star Trek: DS9)
Malcolm Reynolds - Sort of a trick question. Mal’s military rank is Sergent, though he was captain of the Serenity. (Firefly.)
Margaret Houlihan - Major (MASH)
Nick Fury - Originally Sgt, currently Col (Marvel Comics)
Radar O’Reilly - Corporal, although he had a brief stint as Lt. (MASH)
Samantha Carter - Major, unless she’s been promoted in recent seasons. (Stargate)
Sherman T. Potter - Colonel (MASH)
Stanley Tweedle - Never attained a military rank. He was a janitor. Although he is technically captain of the Lexx. (Lexx)
Steve Trevor - Originally Captain, more recently General. (Wonder Woman)
Trapper John McIntyre - Captain (MASH)
Wade Eiling - General (DC Comics)
Webelo Zapp Brannigan - Captain (Futurama)
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### Author:  [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/3 "2007-05-09T00:23:34Z")
[QUOTE=Tengu]
Kira Nerys - Colonel (Star Trek: DS9)
[/QUOTE]
Although after a moment of thought, she was a Major in early seasons, and I can’t remember when she was promoted. \>\_\>
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### Author:  [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/4 "2007-05-09T00:42:40Z")
Edmund Duke : General IIRC. Starcraft
Edward Jellico : Either a Captain in Starfleet or the Captain of the Solar Queen
Esther McQueen : Citizen Admiral and later Secretary of War, Haven
George S Hammond : General, SG1
Janice Rand : Yeoman, Enterprise
Sir Geoffrey Tolwyn : : Admiral, Wing Commander
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### Author:  [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/5 "2007-05-09T00:56:43Z")
[QUOTE=Fish]
Beverly Crusher
[/QUOTE]
Commander, later Captain. (The trick here is that “Chief Medical Officer” is a position, not a rank.)
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### Author:  [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/6 "2007-05-09T00:57:43Z")
Alaric Morgan - General, also Duke (from _Deryni Rising_ and the sequels)
H.M. Murdock - Captain (_A-Team_)
Nathan Bridger - Captain of the _Seaquest_
Steve Austin - I’m pretty sure he was a Colonel, but I could be wrong
Templeton Peck - Lieutenant (_A-Team_)
Thomas Riker - I believe he was also a Lieutenant, but I could be wrong about that as well, in Starfleet
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### Author:  [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/7 "2007-05-09T01:02:04Z")
Incidentally, Henry Blake was Lt. Colonel, not Colonel.
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### Author:  [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/8 "2007-05-09T01:06:23Z")
[QUOTE=Fish]
Below is a list of fictional characters that hold some kind of military rank (from Yeoman on up through General).
[/QUOTE]
Just a point of clarification, yeoman is a job description, not a rank.
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### Author:  [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/9 "2007-05-09T01:12:15Z")
[QUOTE=Kat]
Incidentally, Henry Blake was Lt. Colonel, not Colonel.
[/QUOTE]
Oops, yes he was.
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### Author:  [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/10 "2007-05-09T01:15:51Z")
Yes, it is just a job position, but “Name That Job” didn’t quite have the same ring. 🙂
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### Author:  [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/11 "2007-05-09T01:52:57Z")
Hector Barbossa - (Naval) Captain, although it’s more of a position than a military rank. (Pirates of the Caribbean.)
James Bond - Commander (ret.?).
Anatol Gogol - Colonel General. (James Bond books and movies, I think sometimes as head of KGB.)
Edward Jellico - (Naval) Captain. ST:TNG.
Crix Madine - General. (Empire Strikes Back. I think they didn’t subdivide General grades.)
Sir Geoffrey Tolwyn - Admiral (Wing Commander II, maybe others.)
William Hague - General. (B5.)
---
### Author:  [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/12 "2007-05-09T02:22:25Z")
[QUOTE=Fish]
Dmitri Gredenko
Maggie Beckett
Webelo Zapp Brannigan
[/QUOTE]
Dmitri is (was?) a former Russian general from _24]_
Maggie Becket was a captain in the…marines? I think, though it may have been the army. (_Sliders_
Zapp Brannigan does not have the first name Webelo. I think you’re confusing the fact that at one point, he was called a Webelo, a rank in Cub Scouts. It’s a joke, since often it’s mentioned that some great leaders in the US were Eagle Scouts. A Webelo is a very easy rank to achieve, so it’s poking fun that Zapp is incompetent and could never actually attain the rank of Eagle.
However, that being said, most of the time, Zapp is a captain, but he was also referred to as a 25-star general.
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### Author:  [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/13 "2007-05-09T02:33:28Z")
[QUOTE=bouv]
Zapp Brannigan does not have the first name Webelo. I think you’re confusing the fact that at one point, he was called a Webelo, a rank in Cub Scouts. It’s a joke, since often it’s mentioned that some great leaders in the US were Eagle Scouts. A Webelo is a very easy rank to achieve, so it’s poking fun that Zapp is incompetent and could never actually attain the rank of Eagle.
However, that being said, most of the time, Zapp is a captain, but he was also referred to as a 25-star general.
[/QUOTE]
According to [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zapp_Brannigan), he really is named Webelo Zapp Brannigan and is a General Major and a 25 Star General. Although the ranks could be his own fantasy.
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### Author:  [@Jurph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurph)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/14 "2007-05-09T02:36:49Z")
Major Major Major wears the rank of major, having been automatically promoted to that rank from Private during boot camp. Officially, he is a major; however he has never been commissioned. Additionally, he’s done a great job and his promotion package would doubtless be approved if he didn’t have such a perfect name for the rank. So he is simultaneously a private, a non-commissioned officer, and a major, and would likely be a LtCol(s) if anyone would ever put his package in.
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### Author:  [@alphaboi867](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alphaboi867)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/15 "2007-05-09T03:12:38Z")
[QUOTE=Tengu]
…Samantha Carter - Major, unless she’s been promoted in recent seasons. (Stargate)…
[/QUOTE]
Last time I watched Stargate she was a Lt. Colonel.
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### Author:  [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/16 "2007-05-09T14:21:17Z")
Tengu:
> [@](#):
>
> Father John Patrick Francis Mulcahey - IIRC, he finally made Lieutenant in about the middle of Potter’s term. (MASH)
Actually, he had been Lieutenant since the beginning of the show; it was Captain that he achieved at the time you’re remembering.
For the OP:
Georgi Koskov - General, from the Bond film _The Living Daylights_
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/17 "2007-05-09T16:25:09Z")
Ellen Ripley - Warrant Officer, Weyland-Yutani Corp., USCSS _Nostromo_
Walter “Radar” O’Reilly - Corporal, U.S. Army, 4077th MASH
Hoshi Sato - Ensign, Earth Starfleet, _Enterprise_ NX-01
Valeris - Lieutenant, Federation Starfleet, USS _Enterprise_, NCC-1701-A
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### Author:  [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/18 "2007-05-09T16:26:21Z")
[QUOTE=Tengu]
Radar O’Reilly - Corporal, although he had a brief stint as Lt. (MASH)
[/QUOTE]
I remember the made-up rank of “Cpl-Capt” Hawkeye gave him also, to get into the Officer’s Club when they went to pick up BJ.
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### Author:  [@JSexton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JSexton)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/19 "2007-05-09T16:51:03Z")
Ellen Ripley - Lieutenant (Aliens)
Firmus Piett - Admiral, deceased. (Empire Strikes Back)
John McLane - Detective (Die Hard)
Maximilian Veers - General (Empire Strikes Back)
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [May 9, 2007, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-that-rank/403328/20 "2007-05-09T17:17:55Z")
I don’t think Ripley ever made lieutenant, did she? I’ve always seen her referred to as a warrant officer.
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