# Name your favorite Doper Smartass! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 17, 2004, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805 "2004-06-17T03:53:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/61 "2004-06-19T07:10:58Z")
> [@celestina](#): > > Hey! Over here. Yes. Me! I want to be recognized as a Doper smartass Ok, so show us what you got. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/62 "2004-06-19T07:21:48Z")
> [@Q.E.D.](#): > > Ok, so show us what you got. 😉 Really. The nerve of some folks. You mean you actually want me to _prove_ that I’m a smartass? After I’ve been on the boards all these years stirrin’ up trouble? I don’t think I have to prove anything. My posts speak for themselves. So there. [sniff] ---
**Author:** ![jackelope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 7:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/63 "2004-06-19T07:41:26Z")
**gatopescado**. That guy takes “smartass” to such an extreme that I’m still not sure whether he’s kidding or just a prick. Awesome. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/64 "2004-06-19T14:02:47Z")
> [@celestina](#): > > Really. The nerve of some folks. You mean you actually want me to _prove_ that I’m a smartass? After I’ve been on the boards all these years stirrin’ up trouble? I don’t think I have to prove anything. My posts speak for themselves. So there. [sniff] And you are…? :dubious: \* 😛 * * * \*The above post is an extreme example of smartassism. Please do not try this at home as it likeky to get you smacked by your SO. :wally ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/65 "2004-06-19T20:44:26Z")
Why, **harmless** , you mean tell you ain’t heard of me? Poor thing. You really have been deprived, hon. [giggle] Well, I don’t know where to begin so’s I can get you up to speed. Suffice it to say that I’m one of the best damn clowns the Dope has ever seen. Oh, I’d like to nominate another Doper, though I hope this nomination won’t provide any setbacks to my claim as being a Doper smartass. I’d like to nominate **giraffe**. S/he’s a pretty darn good smartass from what I’ve been able to see of his/her posts. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/66 "2004-06-19T20:59:17Z")
> [@celestina](#): > > Why, **harmless** , you mean tell you ain’t heard of me? Um, no. But I do remember seeing that location tag before. **Today’s Smartass Update for those keeping score:** \*\*Eve \*\* - 12 - Double Digits! :eek: **lieu** - 6 \*\*harmless \*\* - 5 **Hal Briston** - 4 **biggirl** - 3 \*\*Cervaise \*\* - 3 \*\*Miller \*\* - 2 **SkipMagic** - 1 **Ponder Stibbons** - 1 **Nocturnal\_Tick** - 1 **JuanitaTech** - 1 **No Clue Boy** - 1 \*\*Ethilrist \*\* - 1 \*\*Mangetout \*\* - 1 **lno** - 1 **Rubes** - 1 **World Eater** - 1 **EddyTeddyFreddy** - 1 **the Grapist** - 1 **Cecil Adams** - 1 :dubious: **AskNott** - 1 **Shirley Ujest** - 1 **celestina** - 1 **gatopescado** - 1 **giraffe** - 1 As of **celestina** ’s last post. **Eve** ’s still in the lead, with **lieu** gaining rank fast. Gee, I feel like there needs to be trophies or sumpthin’. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/67 "2004-06-19T21:03:22Z")
> [@](#): > > harmless > Charter Member > Join Date: Jun 2003 > Posts: **1,002** > Location: tally-ho, FL :eek: And when the hell did I pass the thousandth marker? :eek: Bet it was on something silly. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/68 "2004-06-19T21:05:29Z")
> [@harmless](#): > > :eek: And when the hell did I pass the thousandth marker? :eek: > > Bet it was on something silly. 😃 I checked. :smack: It was [the one time I gave actual serious advice](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=4983368#post4983368). :smack: :smack: ---
**Author:** ![imthjckaz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/imthjckaz/32/3223_2.png) [@imthjckaz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/imthjckaz)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/69 "2004-06-19T22:07:22Z")
biggirl, elucidator, lno, rubes, ethilrist, Eve and Lynn of Bodoni are some wise acres imho. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/70 "2004-06-19T22:45:06Z")
“What’s/who’s your favorite …?” threads belong in [**In My Humble Opinion**](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=12). I’ll move this for you. **Cajun Man** for the SDMB ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/71 "2004-06-19T23:15:39Z")
> [@Cajun Man](#): > > “What’s/who’s your favorite …?” threads belong in [**In My Humble Opinion**](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=12). I’ll move this for you. > > **Cajun Man** > for the SDMB Smartass 😛 Plus another vote for **Eve**. Go ahead and look, I hadn’t voted since the first post. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2004, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/72 "2004-06-19T23:46:07Z")
> [@Cajun Man](#): > > “What’s/who’s your favorite …?” threads belong in [**In My Humble Opinion**](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/forumdisplay.php?s=&forumid=12). I’ll move this for you. > > **Cajun Man** > for the SDMB He’s just mad he didn’t get nominated. 😛 We’ll count **NoClueBoy** ’s and throw **Cajun Man** in the mix. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2004, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/73 "2004-06-20T03:53:35Z")
> [@harmless](#): > > Does that mean I have to take **Wally** off the list? ☹ > I suppose it’s only fair to the rest of the nominees, since no one else could be expected to achieve such a pure state of smartassedness as to deserve their own smilie, :wally: I hadn’t thought of that. How about we amend it to “she’s dead **and** she never posted here, so she doesn’t count”? ---
**Author:** ![bienville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@bienville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bienville)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2004, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/74 "2004-06-20T07:35:45Z")
I don’t know **Berkut** very well, but I think[this comment](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=4984807&postcount=8) is worthy of a nomination. 😃 Look, everybody! **bienville** learned how to link to a single post! ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2004, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/75 "2004-06-20T17:46:46Z")
My smartass vote goes to **NoClueBoy**. My vote for most annoying posting affectation goes to **Celestina** for that “[giggle]” thing. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2004, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/76 "2004-06-20T20:28:16Z")
The rulers of Smartassia? I’d like to nominate **Ukelele Ike** : as Tracy said of Hepburn, “He don’t post a lot, but what’s there is cherce.” ---
**Author:** ![Governor\_Quinn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@Governor\_Quinn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Governor_Quinn)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2004, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/77 "2004-06-20T20:40:54Z")
Yet another vote for **Eve**. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2004, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/78 "2004-06-20T22:08:15Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > Only Dorothy Parker comes close to her wit, and she’s dead so she doesn’t count. In fact, she doesn’t do much of anything these days. She just lays around all the time. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2004, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/79 "2004-06-21T03:18:04Z")
Geez, don’t post for a year and a half and see how quickly they forget! I give you 3 Welcome Wagon threads, 5 Bullet Reviews, the Ego-Stroking Thread, Halvsie the Two-Legged Dog, the Autopost-A-Matic, a Latin Lesson so we could all learn what “vulting” was, (the last 3 made Threadspotting, BTW), and I don’t get ONE STINKING VOTE?! You can all kiss my smart ass. 😉 And I nominate **Eve** , cuz without her that Halvsie thread was going nowhere. I’d also nominate **Jester** , but is he even around anymore? As I recall he went missing before I stopped posting. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2004, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805/80 "2004-06-21T18:29:48Z")
**One last Smartass Update:** \*\*Eve \*\* - 16 - Now that’s just gotten ridiculous! 😛 **lieu** - 6 \*\*harmless \*\* - 5 **Hal Briston** - 4 **biggirl** - 4 \*\*Cervaise \*\* - 3 \*\*Ethilrist \*\* - 2 \*\*Miller \*\* - 2 **lno** - 2 **Rubes** - 2 **SkipMagic** - 1 **Ponder Stibbons** - 1 **Nocturnal\_Tick** - 1 **JuanitaTech** - 1 **No Clue Boy** - 1 \*\*Mangetout \*\* - 1 **World Eater** - 1 **EddyTeddyFreddy** - 1 **the Grapist** - 1 **Cecil Adams** - 1 :dubious: **AskNott** - 1 **Shirley Ujest** - 1 **celestina** - 1 **gatopescado** - 1 **giraffe** - 1 **elucidator** - 1 **Lynn of Bodoni** - 1 **Cajun Man** - 1 **Berkut** - 1 **NoClueBoy** - 1 **Ukelele Ike** - 1 **Jester** - 1 **Crunchy Frog** - 1 I’d like to throw **lainaf** two votes for this: > [@lainaf](#): > > My vote for most annoying posting affectation goes to Celestina for that “[giggle]” thing. **lainaf** - 2 😃 As of **Crunchy Frog** ’s last post. I think it’s safe to say that **Eve** has won by a landslide. Of course, seeing as to how I’m in Florida, so I’ll give the actual result after a few recounts. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-doper-smartass/250805.md?page=5)