# Name your favorite Shel Silverstein poem... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 21, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105 "2003-04-21T19:37:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Jadis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@Jadis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jadis)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/1 "2003-04-21T19:37:14Z")
I was cleaning my bathroom over the weekend, and one of my favorite Shel Silverstein poems popped into my head…I’m pretty sure it’s entitled **The Hat** : _Teddy said it was a hat, So I put it on. Now Dad is saying “Where the heck’s the toilet plunger gone?”_ That never fails to tickle me. So…what’s your favorite? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/2 "2003-04-21T19:43:18Z")
My memory is failing me, but IIRC there was one about someone diving into an empty pool. It had had something about “the most twistable turnable” in it, but I don’t remember if that was describing the dive or the diver. Anyway that was my favorite. Off to Google! ---
**Author:** ![caveman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/caveman/32/7242_2.png) [@caveman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/caveman)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/3 "2003-04-21T19:45:49Z")
_A Boy Named Sue_ ---
**Author:** ![Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e47c2d/32.png) [@Biffy\_the\_Elephant\_Shrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biffy_the_Elephant_Shrew)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/4 "2003-04-21T19:55:22Z")
Gotta be [“Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout Would Not Take the Garbage Out.”](http://homepages.nyu.edu/~tav205/poetry_pers/poetry_pers_fin/shel_sarah.html) I once held a roomful of first graders spellbound with that one. When I got to the line: _At last the garbage reached so high That finally it touched the sky_ One little boy whispered, **"Wowwww…"** ---
**Author:** ![NoCoolUserName](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5fc32e/32.png) [@NoCoolUserName](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NoCoolUserName)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/5 "2003-04-21T20:07:36Z")
My favorite is not a poem, but one page of Uncle Shelby’s ABZ Book: E. E is for Ernie. Ernie is the genie who lives in the ceiling. E is also for egg. Ernie loves eggs! So go into the kitchen and get a nice fresh egg and throw it as hard as you can at the ceiling and yell: “Catch Ernie, catch the egg!” And Ernie will lean down out of the ceiling and catch the egg. (From memory, so may not be exact.) ---
**Author:** ![Jadis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@Jadis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jadis)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/6 "2003-04-21T20:18:13Z")
Biffy, I _love_ that one!! There was another one in that book (I think it’s **Where The Sidewalk Ends** ) about a girl who was faking sick, listing a litany of ailments she had, until she found out it was Saturday and there was no school. Classic! ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/7 "2003-04-21T20:20:37Z")
_There’s too many kids in this tub, There’s too many elbows to scrub, I just washed a behind, That I’m sure wasn’t mine, There’s too many kids in this tub!_ That one’s not my all time favorite, but I had to memorize a poem for a 4th grade assignment MANY years ago, and that was it. My favorite may be the one about the dancing pants. My fifth grade teacher used to read it to us and she would get the giggles so bad every time that she could barely finish it. ---
**Author:** ![Merla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Merla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merla)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/8 "2003-04-21T20:25:32Z")
My all-time favorites, no doubt, are “We can’t find the cat- we don’t know where it’s at- Oh where did it go? Does anyone know? Let’s ask this walking hat.” And of course, “I will not play at tug-o-wars- I’d rather play at hug-o-wars where everyone hugs, instead of tugs and everyone giggles and rolls on the rugs and everyone tickles and everyone grins and everyone snuggles and everyone- wins.” Merla 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![AzRaek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/azraek/32/16739_2.png) [@AzRaek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AzRaek)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/9 "2003-04-21T20:30:33Z")
My beard grows to my toes I never wears no clothes I wraps my hair around my bare And down the road I goes. Poor grammar, lovely meter, fun to recite over and over. ---
**Author:** ![DiabloKitty2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@DiabloKitty2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiabloKitty2)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/10 "2003-04-21T21:22:00Z")
My favorite one was next to the light switch in the library. I can’t remember it exactly, but it goes something like: “Oh no! What do I do? This library book is one-hundred-forty years overdue!” Wow, I haven’t spelled numbers in so long that I’m not even sure if that’s how you spell forty. Or is it fourty? I’m pretty sure the first one is right. At any rate, the poem continues on as the person debates whether or not he should return it and face the long fines or keep it even longer. It’s great. ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/11 "2003-04-21T21:30:48Z")
[For Sale](http://olp.swlauriersb.qc.ca/poets/silverstein.htm) _One sister for sale! One sister for sale! One crying and spying young sister for sale! … Do I hear a dollar? A nickle? A penny? …_ My older brother likes to recite it to me on a regular basis. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/12 "2003-04-21T21:42:08Z")
My absolute favorite, had I to pick one, would have to be “Sick”. But I’m also quite fond of “Band-Aids” (reciting all of the body parts with band-aids on them, in case he should ever get a cut), the afore-mentioned “Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout”, “The Unicorn” (about how the loveliest of all, the Unicorn, got left off the Ark), and “Sister for Sale” (which is about exactly what it sounds like). Oh, yeah, and “Pancakes”, and “The Walrus got Braces”, and “Drats”, and “Somebody Ate the Baby”, and “I’m Being Swallowed by a Boa Constrictor”, and “True Story”, and… ---
**Author:** ![Helena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c68b51/32.png) [@Helena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/13 "2003-04-21T22:21:28Z")
The one about the dog with a tail at either end. (“Though he’s not so good at knowing just exactly where he’s going, he is very very good at sitting down.”) ---
**Author:** ![Ludo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Ludo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludo)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/14 "2003-04-21T23:01:35Z")
World Eater: > [@](#): > > My memory is failing me, but IIRC there was one about someone diving into an empty pool. It had had something about “the most twistable turnable” in it, but I don’t remember if that was describing the dive or the diver. That is my favorite poemby Shel Silverstein, called _The Twistable Turnable Man_. When I was a kid, I had that poem memorized and I could say it in under 15 seconds flat. It was the typical kiddie trick that my parents would always have me do at family things. My mom got the biggest kick out of it. However, I don’t remember it having anything about a pool. It was just a non-sensical poem about a man who could twist and turn about. Another one of my favorites is the title poem in Where The Sidewalk Ends. And another one of my favorites is one called _Invitation_, which starts w/ "If you are a dreamer, come in/ If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar…You get the point. I could go on and on about Shel Silverstein, but sadly, I am a slow typist, and many years would pass before I could do him justice. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/15 "2003-04-21T23:03:30Z")
> [@](#): > > Some folks love ham hocks > And some folks love pork chops > And some folks love vegetable soup > And Roland the Roadie loves Gertrude the Groupie > But Gertrude the Groupie loves groups There’s also “Stacy Brown has Two.” 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/16 "2003-04-21T23:25:31Z")
> [@](#): > > I could go on and on about Shel Silverstein, but sadly, I am a slow typist, and many years would pass before I could do him justice. Would that, by any chance, be because you’re only one inch tall? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2003, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/17 "2003-04-21T23:49:30Z")
I’ve always liked this one… Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. And if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my toys to break: So none of the other kids can use 'em. Amen ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/18 "2003-04-22T01:38:30Z")
Come in If you are a dreamer, come in If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar A hoper, a pray-er, a magic bean buyer If you’re a pretender, come sit by my fire For we have some flax-golden tales to spin Come in, come in. Also, _Listen to the MUSTN’TS_, _I’m writing this poem from inside a lion_, the one about the crocodile’s tooth and _I’m being eaten by a boa constrictor_. ---
**Author:** ![fizgig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f04885/32.png) [@fizgig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fizgig)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/19 "2003-04-22T01:47:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by AzRaek \* > \*\*My beard grows to my toes > I never wears no clothes > I wraps my hair around my bare > And down the road I goes. > > Poor grammar, lovely meter, fun to recite over and over. \*\* That one immediately came to mind, but so many other good ones have been posted. I like the Silvia Cynthia Stout one, and also the “My dad gave me a dollar bill, 'cause I’m his smartest son” one, though it’s more of a story than a poem. Thanks to the OP for stirring a fond childhood memory. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Trillian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trillian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trillian)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2003, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105/20 "2003-04-22T01:55:02Z")
The Smoke-off Thank you, Dr Demento 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/name-your-favorite-shel-silverstein-poem/170105.md?page=2)