It’s akin to watching the bobbing glasses of beer during an episode of Cheers.
Have to echo this one. Stop trying to convey how frenetic the activity is by shaky cam. Show me the friggin’ action and I’ll see how frenetic it is.
AMEN! People slice open their palms, or even slice open their thumb. How do you expect to be able to hold anything after that, while bleeding all over it?
Yeah, that is annoying. “No, I’m serious, see, I just racked my gun.” “I don’t believe you, maybe you should rack your gun a couple more times and see if it convinces me. No, not yet. No, not yet. Try again. By the way, how many bullets do you have in that thing?”
Yeah, “science is bad” is a common theme.
Absolutely. Along those lines, I’ve seem filming where they shoot the scene from like the woods or something, with bushes or tree limbs partially obscuring the character. That has been used as shorthand for so long that I immediately interpret it as showing us the viewpoint of some attacker who is going to come onto the scene. I’ve now seen this effect done a few times where that is not the intended effect, and it confuses the hell out of me.
I also hated it when Lucas did this by inserting stuff into the street scene in Star Wars. Too many obstructions coming between the camera and the focus of the scene.
Hey directors, the camera is not supposed to be like we’re some person standing around watching this take place across the street, it’s supposed to be some omniscient view that isn’t really there. Omniscient views don’t get obstructed by random crap.
Yes, I see it everywhere, and it bugs me.
I’ll add to that the current use of a taser as a sedative. Need to knock someone out quietly? Taser them on the neck. Instant unconsciousness. :rolleyes:
Coke bottles are surprisingly solid. I’ve bounced empty ones off the ground.
Yes, the characters have some super secret plot they’re about to break 27 laws and kill three people, and they converse in casual terms in the middle of a room full of strangers who magically don’t notice a thing they say.
Stream Brotherhood on NetFlix. Similar idea.
And drug/gas-induced unconsciousness, too. A couple of bad guys with the brains of a walnut buy some chloroform, dip a rag in it, and slap it over someone’s mouth. The person instantly goes limp. The bad guys do what they’ve come to do. Ten minutes later…
BAD GUY 1: Do we need to deal with that guard?
BAD GUY 2 (looking at watch): Nah, he’ll be out for another 23 minutes.
Aaaargh!
And fight scenes in general. Chuck Norris delivers one punch/kick each to four bad guys with guns. They drop to the ground. He turns his back and walks away, not even bothering to pick up the guns. It’s okay. He hit 'em. They’re out.
When was the last time you saw a barfight in a movie where everyone had bloody knuckles afterwards? How about a broken finger, rib, nose, or jaw? They punch each other, break pool cues and beer bottles over each other’s heads, and nobody ends up in the hospital.
The mangled southern accent in films: Keanu Reeves in The Devil’s Advocate? Ack!
Followed closely by the mangled eastern European accent; pick from whatever: Harrison Ford in K19: The Widowmaker? Sounded like he practiced listening to Rocky and Bullwinkle installments.
I recently watched the documentary Tesla, Master of Lightning. Stacey Keach did the ludicrous voiceover for the Serb genius. Unreal!
That’s a BIG pet peeve of mine - the baby always looks about 3 months old too. I’ve never seen a newborn baby but I understand that they’re pointy-headed, red, squishy and covered in gross slimy stuff - every time I see a perfectly clean, round-headed newborn on TV I’m all “That’s not how it happens!!” :mad:
I can’t stand how in old black & white movies they refer to each other as “dahling” all the time. Did people really speak like that in the olden days?
Cars that still go after being smashed to shit. As if fluid wouldn’t be leaking all over the place, tie-rods bent, etc. Sheesh.
It pulled me right out too. They also used to have him “hearing spirit voices talking to him” from beyond. Pisses me off, knowing that it’s what John Edwards does and it’s a horrible thing to do to someone, pretending you can hear their dead friend. Thankfully, someone must have clued them in on this and he stopped “talking to dead people”. Everything else fake that he does I allow, don’t ask me why.
X-Files did this too once; Mulder comes to a scene where Scully is performing chest compressions on someone. She says, “he’s alive but unconscious!” Well then STOP DOING THAT!
The first Naked Gun movie skewered this perfectly. I don’t know how to post a youtube link that starts at an exact time in the clip, so the part I am referring to starts at about the 4:20 mark in this clip.
I personally have modeled my life on Bad Santa.
I just saw this one (again) on a TV cop show:
The police have pictures of the bad guy. They’ve spotted him/her in a very public place. There are four plainclothes detectives, and the bad guy has never seen them before. Do they strategically stroll around and position themselves as one of them walks up four feet from the bad guy and whips out the gun?
No.
When they’re all clumped up halfway across the courtyard, one of them yells out the bad guy’s name and says STOP! POLICE!
Sad female solo songs that end a lot of shows like Alias. My wife and I sing along adding our own words like, “When you get real sad because your boyfriend is a bad spy and you had to kill him…life’s like that sometimes…”
Action scenes that are filmed too close-up.
Except in The Life of Brian, there’s an entire scene with the people at the back not being able to hear what Jesus is saying, “the Greeks will inherit the earth?!”
“Blessed are the cheese makers.” 
So, just HOW lucrative is the wooden pickle carving profession? 
FYI, you just add #t=ms to the RL, where * is the number or minutes and seconds. For example, your clip would be http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMn9gvTgMFg&feature=related#t=4m20s
And, yes, if the videos long enough, you can also include the hours, followed by h.
[quote=“Gary “Wombat” Robson, post:69, topic:620674”]
Picking actors who look alike for all of the main roles. With my face blindness, it’s almost impossible for me to follow the plot unless they have different hair colors, hair length, facial hair, body shapes, styles of dress, or SOMETHING.
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The spouse and I have a name for this, which I coined during “Jurassic Park: The Lost World:”
“Brits in Tan Syndrome”
I swear there must have been at least five British guys in tan outfits, most of whom closely resembled each other, in a movie that spent most of its time in semi-darkness or moving so fast you couldn’t focus on the faces. It was very annoying.
A few more, some of which have already been mentioned:
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Vomiting, unless it’s (a) integral to the plot, and (b) telegraphed enough that I can look away before it happens. I hate the sudden shock-vomit.
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Romance in movies that don’t need romance. I would love to more movies with at least one female lead where she didn’t fall in love with someone (or someone falls in love with her) and they end up in a romance. That was one thing I liked a lot about “The Avengers.” Competent female hero and no relationships (other than a professional/friend one with Hawkeye).
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Why does every woman in a big-name movie have to be movie-star gorgeous, even if she’s playing a computer nerd or a grocery clerk? There are plenty of average looking men in movies, some of them even in starring roles. Give us some average looking women, too.
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The “there’s always a parking spot close to where we’re going” thing.
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Don’t get me started on the various types of computer and database bogosity.
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Killing the family cat to show what a badass the bad guy is.
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This doesn’t happen as much anymore, but soft-focus filming on women. The original Star Trek TV show was notorious about this. Every time there was a woman on screen, I could just hear the director in the background yelling, “Okay, break out the Vaseline and smear it all over the lens!”
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Lingering over babies, obviously waiting for the audience to go “Awwwwww.” I don’t think babies are cute, usually. In movies I almost always think they’re annoying, unless they’re integral to the plot. I don’t like the way some movies pander to the theoretical “awww” instinct. (Unless it’s kittens. Then I’m helpless.
) -
This definitely doesn’t happen anymore, but I notice it a lot in old movies. Kids speaking in unnatural voices. Girls usually have that horrible Shirley Temple tone (you know the one I mean–I can duplicate it perfectly audibly but I can’t type it) and boys YELL all their lines. I’ve even noticed some adult females in old movies doing a grown-up version of “Shirley Temple voice.” I want to chuck something at the TV every time I see it.
Very. I sell them for use in the live sex shows in the bars. 
Keep slicing my danged hand though. 
I give you 50 Years of the Wilhelm Scream
I can’t remember the title, but I rented a Russian movie after seeing the trailer on another DVD. It turned out that the amazing action sequence that made up pretty much the entire trailer was the only action sequence in the entire 2-hour-plus movie. The movie wasn’t bad, it just wasn’t what was advertised.
Dammit man, now I have cappuccino all over my keyboard…!!
[quote=“Gary “Wombat” Robson, post:69, topic:620674”]
Dark scenes where I can’t see anything on the screen if I’m watching TV during the day.
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Hello The X Files!! Although I maintain that they do this in shows made in Vancouver so we can’t see that everyone uses the same motel room, or warehouse, or whatever building they’re in as Mulder and Scully
They did a riff on that in Stargate SG-1, newbie Ben Browder looks a lot like old crew Michael Shanks, so Vala makes a comment about the “small gene pool”.
