# NASA denies that it is running child slave colony on Mars **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 30, 2017, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206 "2017-06-30T16:48:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Hermitian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hermitian/32/470_2.png) [@Hermitian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hermitian)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/1 "2017-06-30T16:48:13Z")
NASA [denies](http://www.thedailybeast.com/nasa-denies-that-its-running-a-child-slave-colony-on-mars) that it is running child slave colony on Mars. This brings up two questions: 1. This is exactly what they would say if they _were_ running a child slave colony on Mars. Can we trust them? 2. If they are not running it, who is? Will someone take responsibility? ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/2 "2017-06-30T16:59:19Z")
My biggest concern is that most of them never made it to Mars at all and NASA is covering it up. What if there was a mutiny on their space ship that triggered a rash of cannibalism? If you think child sex slaves are a problem, just wait until you have to deal with cannibal sex slaves. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/3 "2017-06-30T17:06:54Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > 1. If they are not running it, who is? Will someone take responsibility? My money is on the Arcturans. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/4 "2017-06-30T17:07:53Z")
Sure, **Shagnasty** , try to distract us with stories about cannibalism. What are you trying to hide? Why are you so intent on diverting our attention from Mars? ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/5 "2017-06-30T17:21:33Z")
So _that_ is what Elton John was talking about! ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/6 "2017-06-30T17:22:47Z")
That’s cold as hell. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/7 "2017-06-30T19:13:55Z")
Of course THEY are not running it. I am. So technically, they are correct. Just had them build a rammed-earth (mars?) pizza oven for me. Now the problem is the lack of cheese. Hopefully the next European probe doesn’t crash, because it is supposed to be carrying 100kg of Mozzarella for me. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/8 "2017-06-30T19:19:51Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Just had them build a rammed-earth (mars?) pizza oven for me. Now the problem is the lack of cheese. Should have built it on the moon. ---
**Author:** ![watchwolf49](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9c0ed/32.png) [@watchwolf49](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/watchwolf49)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/9 "2017-06-30T19:34:49Z")
I _knew_ it … that’s a _fake_ child slavery colony on Mars then !!! ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/10 "2017-06-30T19:41:25Z")
Where do you suppose the fake children are coming from? How deep does the fakery run? Is it a Baby Face Finster dressed as a baby type fake or Blade Runner replicant baby type thing? Why is Billy Crystal not on TV more? Why is it a shipment if it’s delivered in a car?Where _have_ all the flowers gone? All will be revealed in next week’s Soap. ---
**Author:** ![Hari\_Seldon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hari_seldon/32/5173_2.png) [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/11 "2017-06-30T19:56:50Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Should have built it on the moon. Come on; you don’t make pizza with green cheese. But why not bring a cow to Mars. So NASA who faked a moon landing or several is now running child slaves to Mars. Wait till the conspiracy theorists hear about this. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/12 "2017-06-30T20:04:19Z")
> [@Hari\_Seldon](#): > > Come on; you don’t make pizza with green cheese. But why not bring a cow to Mars. Low gravity milk gives a lighter cheese. ---
**Author:** ![PastTense](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pasttense/32/14550_2.png) [@PastTense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PastTense)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/13 "2017-06-30T20:06:51Z")
Is the colony located near the canals–so they could take advantage of the structures left behind by the alien civilization? ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/14 "2017-06-30T20:07:16Z")
Just make sure that you don’t use any brown cows. Who wants chocolate cheese? ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/15 "2017-06-30T20:11:09Z")
If they aren’t running a child slave colony then why do they need women? Though, that might explain why the red planet is so angry? ---
**Author:** ![Trancephalic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trancephalic/32/380_2.png) [@Trancephalic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trancephalic)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/16 "2017-06-30T20:11:15Z")
So where were the spiders, while the fly tried to break our cheese balls ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/17 "2017-06-30T20:15:10Z")
> [@Trancephalic](#): > > So where were the spiders, while the fly tried to break our cheese balls They’re partying with Dr Manhattan and his buddy the Leopard Messiah. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/18 "2017-06-30T20:20:30Z")
> [@G0sp3l](#): > > If they aren’t running a child slave colony then why do they need women? Though, that might explain why the red planet is so angry? Mars steals all of the women from the outer solar system. This explains why Uranus and Neptune are blue balls. ---
**Author:** ![Trancephalic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trancephalic/32/380_2.png) [@Trancephalic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trancephalic)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/19 "2017-06-30T20:24:17Z")
That makes me angry. Very angry, indeed. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/20 "2017-06-30T20:24:37Z")
I am particularly concerned about the children seeing Dejah Thoris running around Mars in the all together. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206.md?page=2)