# NASA denies that it is running child slave colony on Mars **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 30, 2017, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206 "2017-06-30T16:48:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/21 "2017-06-30T22:47:36Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > I am particularly concerned about the children seeing Dejah Thoris running around Mars in the all together. Nitpick: Dejah Thoris does not live on Mars, she lives on Barsoom. Oh, and to her, we humans live on Jasoom. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/22 "2017-06-30T22:54:47Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > Nitpick: Dejah Thoris does not live on Mars, she lives on Barsoom. Oh, and to her, we humans live on Jasoom. And Leelo is from Jupiter, known as Big Badaboom. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/23 "2017-06-30T23:23:18Z")
And not to be nitpicky, but it isn’t slavery. It is Indentured Servitude, to pay off the costs of shipping them to my mines. ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2017, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/24 "2017-06-30T23:46:34Z")
I am finding this news story mildly implausible for a couple of reasons. Any children that are sent on a two decades long space mission wouldn’t be children anymore once they get to Mars. Most of them would be in their late 20’s by now. Secondly, who are they sex slaves for? I have heard talk about a Las Vegas style sin city being built on Mars but I don’t believe it mostly. Look through a telescope yourself. There is no neon strip there and the weather sucks. There is no way pedophiles are flying all the way to Mars for child sex slaves when it is cheaper and easier just to go to Southeast Asia. Child sex slaves are a real thing but I don’t think that most of them are being sent to Mars. My suspicion is that Big Milk is keeping them on dairy farms here on Earth judging by the photographic evidence that they publish on the side of milk cartons. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/25 "2017-07-01T00:45:58Z")
It’s a puzzle, that’s for sure ---
**Author:** ![dba\_Fred](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c37758/32.png) [@dba\_Fred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dba_Fred)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/26 "2017-07-01T12:06:11Z")
NASA and Uranus, _there’s_ the deep, dark secret that should be probed. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 12:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/27 "2017-07-01T12:13:22Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > Nitpick: Dejah Thoris does not live on Mars, she lives on Barsoom. Oh, and to her, we humans live on Jasoom. A calot by any other name ---
**Author:** ![El\_Kabong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/el_kabong/32/496_2.png) [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/28 "2017-07-01T12:52:20Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > NASA [denies](http://www.thedailybeast.com/nasa-denies-that-its-running-a-child-slave-colony-on-mars) that it is running child slave colony on Mars. Well, they aren’t. Anyone with a clue knows the child slave colony is on Titan. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/29 "2017-07-01T13:05:40Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#): > > Well, they aren’t. Anyone with a clue knows the child slave colony is on Titan. Ah, that is why the twenty years! Brilliant! ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/30 "2017-07-01T13:11:06Z")
I would encourage NASA to keep something in mind: It’s not the child slavery ring on Mars, it’s the coverup. (Besides, Mars doesn’t have rings.) ETA: I suppose that’s why this one is being called a colony and not a ring. Out of a pizza joint, that’s a ring. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/31 "2017-07-01T13:13:49Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > My biggest concern is that most of them never made it to Mars at all and NASA is covering it up. What if there was a mutiny on their space ship that triggered a rash of cannibalism? If you think child sex slaves are a problem, just wait until you have to deal with cannibal sex slaves. Cannibal Sex Slaves of Mars? Man…Infocom’s REALLY stepping up their game. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2017, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/32 "2017-07-01T13:21:37Z")
From your original link: “At the beginning of his campaign in December of 2015, President Donald Trump told Alex Jones that “your reputation is amazing” and “I will not let you down” in a half-hour interview on InfoWars.” This is scary. Is President Trump going to launch an enquiry into NASA? :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2017, 11:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/33 "2017-07-03T11:49:52Z")
It’s perfectly simple - Hillary moved her pedophile ring from the [pizza parlor](http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/pizzagate-clinton-conspiracy-theory-led-dc-shooting-article-1.2899371) to Mars. Wake up, sheeple! Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2017, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/34 "2017-07-03T22:11:09Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > It’s perfectly simple - Hillary moved her pedophile ring from the [pizza parlor](http://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/pizzagate-clinton-conspiracy-theory-led-dc-shooting-article-1.2899371) to Mars. > > Wake up, sheeple! That particular pizza parlor was only the latest incarnation of this conspiracy. As we all know this has been going on for over 20 years; over the years insiders have tried to get the truth out, but have had to do this cautiously for fear of reprisals from the powerful forces involved. Back in 1995 some people at Pixar tried with references to Pizza Planet in _Toy Story_, the obvious symbolism of the claw machine, and the villain trying to send Buzz into space. More recently, the \*Five Nights at Freddy’s \*games have both tried to expose the conspiracy and its terrible history, and used numbers coded into the games to point to other pizzerias involved (though obviously all have claimed innocence). It seems likely that this getting too close to the truth is why _FNAF_ creator Scott Cawthon has been forced to cancel the next game in the series. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2017, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/35 "2017-07-03T22:33:37Z")
Now see, I heard it was an animal sex slave colony on Mars. I don’t know if that’s better or worse. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2017, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/36 "2017-07-03T23:18:46Z")
Now there’s a [Suspiciously Specific Denial](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SuspiciouslySpecificDenial)if I ever heard one. ---
**Author:** ![Julius\_Henry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8797f3/32.png) [@Julius\_Henry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Julius_Henry)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/37 "2017-07-04T00:25:34Z")
That would explain why they had to kidnap Santa Claus. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/38 "2017-07-04T01:32:19Z")
> [@Peter\_Morris](#): > > Now there’s a [Suspiciously Specific Denial](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SuspiciouslySpecificDenial)if I ever heard one. Because like I said, they aren’t running it. I am. ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/39 "2017-07-04T03:08:52Z")
To be serious for just one moment, I really feel that NASA should have confirmed this story. I feel like the people involved in this sort of conspiracy nonsense should should be lead down the rabbit hole till their heads asplode. Denial doesn’t work because as **Hermitian** astutely points out, these idiots aren’t going to believe the denial anyway. Confirmation is the answer. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/40 "2017-07-04T06:56:28Z")
> [@Princhester](#): > > Confirmation is the answer. Followed by the offer of a free trip to Mars for anyone who wants to check up in person [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206.md?page=3)