# NASA denies that it is running child slave colony on Mars **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 30, 2017, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206 "2017-06-30T16:48:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/41 "2017-07-04T08:25:25Z")
For them and their whole family! Transportation to be on Ark Fleet Ship B. Telephone sanitization, account executive management, hair dressing, tired TV production, insurance sales, personnel management, security, public relations and management consultancy provided free of charge. Accommodation on Mars, oxygen and return fare not included. Management do not warrant that any representations regarding mutant star goats are accurate. The transportation, all names, characters, and incidents intended by this venture are fictitious and no identification with actual Golgafrinchans (living or deceased), Golgafrinchan itself, buildings, and products is intended or should be inferred. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/42 "2017-07-04T15:33:43Z")
> [@Julius\_Henry](#): > > That would explain why they had to kidnap Santa Claus. Please, you spell it S-a-n-t-y C-l-a-u-s, HOORAY FOR SANTY CLAUS!!! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2017, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/43 "2017-07-04T16:00:29Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > Please, you spell it S-a-n-t-y C-l-a-u-s, HOORAY FOR SANTY CLAUS!!! You can’t fool me, there ain’t no Sanity Clause. ---
**Author:** ![Corner\_Case](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/corner_case/32/234_2.png) [@Corner\_Case](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Corner_Case)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/44 "2017-07-25T18:02:06Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > If you think child sex slaves are a problem, just wait until you have to deal with cannibal sex slaves. I think “cannibal” sex slaves is really a self-limiting problem, don’t you? ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/45 "2017-07-25T18:03:48Z")
> [@Corner\_Case](#): > > I think “cannibal” sex slaves is really a self-limiting problem, don’t you? Cuts down on the oral sex. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/46 "2017-07-25T18:27:45Z")
It poses one of those rocket science problems that NASA is understandably famous for. If one cannibal sex slave will feed ten cannibal sex slaves for a day, and there are 100 sex slaves to begin with, how long will they last? ---
**Author:** ![Gorsnak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gorsnak/32/7587_2.png) [@Gorsnak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorsnak)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/47 "2017-07-25T18:35:51Z")
It’s the Tsiolkovsky rocket equation all over again. Not only do you have to send extra cannibal sex slaves to feed the cannibal sex slaves, but you have to send _even more_ cannibal sex slaves to feed those. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/48 "2017-07-25T18:36:31Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > Any children that are sent on a two decades long space mission wouldn’t be children anymore once they get to Mars. NASA aint a bunch of dummies, they sent them in stasis. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/49 "2017-07-25T19:25:01Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > NASA aint a bunch of dummies, they sent them in stasis. I bet those NASA guys are clever enough to slap some “CANNIBAL SEX SLAVE STEW” labels over some Dinty Moore and send them on their way. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/50 "2017-07-25T19:36:59Z")
Transcription error–it is about cannibal sex _salves_. Those bites can get infected. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2017, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206/51 "2017-07-25T21:13:53Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > 1. If they are not running it, who is? Will someone take responsibility? ISIS. They take responsibility for every terrible thing that happens to anyone, anywhere. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/nasa-denies-that-it-is-running-child-slave-colony-on-mars/790206.md?page=2)